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  3. SUGA29

    5 yrs later

    I am a 29 year old black female with hsv 2, I've had it for about 5 years now. When i found out my mind spiraled, i've had my dark moments as well and trapped myself in a hole for sometime. I hated and blamed myself sometimes i still do, but over time i've learned to love myself and my body even more. Patience is always key, i have met some incredible people, who did not judge me at all despite my condition, even though the relationship did not work out with them i still decided to push myself away and spare the pain because i didn't want to get hurt. You are so loved lady and you are so worth
  4. I’m an asthmatic and recently contracted COVID. I believe my husband brought it home from work unfortunately. I’m on day 8 and my breathing is getting real bad. My doctor gave me azithromycin and prednisone if I feel like I need it. We all know prednisone and any immunosuppressant don't mix well with herpes. Years ago I would have zero issues being on prednisone for my asthma but starting two years ago I’ve had bad herpes symptoms even while on antivirals ehich I’ve had to tweak my dosing etc. The passed several months I’ve felt great “down there” so I’m worried starting prednisone for my brea
  5. I’m glad you’re working on finding a therapist; I think the right one can really help you work through the feelings surrounding this. I have heard stories from people saying they were told “be happy it’s not HIV”, which I find to be dismissive and quite honestly, cruel. You can relieved you don’t have HIV while simultaneously being dismayed that you have HSV-2. I, luckily, was never told anything like that by the doctors I’ve been treated by, but I would not take kindly to a comment like that. I’m sorry you’ve been spoken to that way. My initial outbreak was more systemic- really high fe
  6. No, unfortunately having one doesn’t make you any less likely to acquire the other.
  7. Does having one sub type of HSV make you less likely to acquire another? So, I have GHSV2. My partner has oral HSV. I do not know the sub-type but see from a a previous post that oral HSV2 is super rare. I have never had an oral outbreak and therefore assuming I do not have it there.
  8. I decided to take suppressive therapy for the first time two years ago. By this point I had been HSV2 positive for 18 years. At first everything seemed ok but I started to notice very strange side effects of muscle twitches and jerks. Has anyone else had these strange side effects from this medication. I decided to quit Valtrex and the symptoms subsided. When I take it for outbreaks for three days twice a day I do not notice these symptoms. I am inclined to think this medication is hard on the liver and kidneys and perhaps causes a mineral imbalance? Any idea?
  9. I have known about my HSV status since the age of 19. To the best of my knowledge I have never transmitted it. I took meds only for outbreaks and have been in many short and long term relationships. I am married now and have been with my partner for seven years. He is not aware of my status. I decided to take Valtrex to suppress the virus but noticed side effects of the medication that I did not like and have since stopped taking it. Obviously someone is passing it or else we would not be here!
  10. I have been HSV positive for 20 years. Married and divorced and back in the dating game I disclosed to everyone and also got really sick of "the talk" and the rejection. I agree that so many people have it and don't even know. It's a skin condition that is more stigmatized than HIV. I made a decision to stop disclosing and then I met someone with whom I have been for seven years. He has no idea that I have this. I have had outbreaks here and there and take medication and abstain from sexual contact during these times, but I know he could still contract it. Or, perhaps he already does and ha
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  12. So I want to start out by saying I am in an active outbreak. Anyway I had to have major dental work done the other day and when I came home took the prescribed meds and they made me a little loopy so I went up to lay down. Well I scrated my area a bit which is something I trypically avoid doing anyway I started dozing off (non pain med me would have washed their hands). My partner came in the room which woke me up a bit and he held my hand. Like a typical man he adjusted and scratched his area which is not unusual then went to the bathroom. Ok so this may be stupid but I also have anxiety
  13. Opinions or information would be great. My backstory, one year ago I had my first outbreak. Normal flu like systems at first followed by a small cluster of blisters on penis. I knew exactly what it was but didn’t know when or how I contracted it. Ashamed to go to the doctor or get tested I hoped for the best and prayed it wouldn’t come back. Less than two months later. Again , and again. After three outbreaks I got online and went to GetRoman. Was prescribed daily 1000mg valtrex. Somewhat surprised the virus? But I could tell my body constantly wanted to have an outbreak. Here I am one year la
  14. Thank you both for your replies. @minerva, thank you for your kind words and @mr_hopp, yes I have reached out through my doctors and am waiting to get an appointment with a therapist. I found your website actually because I was mostly looking for answers to a lot of physical problems I was going through as a result of the HSV 2 diagnosis that I felt like all of my doctors weren’t really helping with, and I’m great for these forums because it made me feel like it wasn’t “all in my head” as I was being told and that other people were going through it as well. This initial outbreak lasted for alm
  15. Having vaginal itching symptoms for 6+ months. No lesions to date / anything that looks like google image search. 2 months ago (last sexual encounter was 18 months prior) had intense itching small paper cut down there. What was troubling for me was the swollen lymph / achey muscle flu feeling. Did a blood test - negative. My WBC count and neutrophils doubled in the past month. vaginal itch hits every 4 days like clockwork. Past few weeks horrible symptoms of swollen lymph (groin and armpit) muscle weakness , muscle twitching, —- Red inflammation in my nose that initially itche
  16. Hey everyone forgive me here - first time posting, and really unsure what’s going on with my body. I’ve read some of your stories and appears we may be going through something similar. Was in a monogamous relationship that ended 1.5 years ago. No sex (his religious beliefs) Lots of oral and skin to skin contact. Shortly after it ended had vaginal itching and UTI symptoms (burning urethra and frequency - no pain when urinating). Did STD testing (did not include HSV) / urine test — everything negative. 6 months ago in the summer — (no sexual contact in that entire year) itching
  17. The herpes virus isn't in semen unless the fluid from an active outbreak mixes with it. Herpes is passed from skin-to-skin contact/friction. Only 1-2% of all oral HSV-2 cases are oral, which means it is very rare to pass it in that way. (Of course avoid oral sex if you feel prodrome symptoms.) Here's an article that should give you all the data you'll need: https://www.herpesopportunity.com/post/spreading-genital-herpes-hsv-2-from-oral-sex ... especially this clip from my interview with Dr. Leone:
  18. Hi @MG_25 and I'm so sorry this happened. I have met a lot of women in my coaching practice who have gotten herpes by sexual assault. It can certainly feel like sexual assault is already enough to process and heal from, then herpes on top of that can feel like too much. But you will get through this. You deserve to be treated not just with respect, but with deep love and reverence. Feeling safe, considered and taken care of in relationship is what I wish for you above all. And like @~Minerva~ said, the fact that you are reaching out for support shows you are committed to your healing. It takes
  19. Sorry you're going through it! That person was right that for the majority of folks their first herpes outbreak is the worst; but during the first 6 months to a year, your body is still working to build up immunity to the virus, so especially during periods of stress (yes, PANDEMIC anyone?), your body can't mount a good enough defense to keep the virus at bay. It's good to check in to see if there are any other underlying things going on, but my hunch would be the intersection of it being less than a year for you and living through an incredibly stressful and disconcerting time for us all. Let
  20. If both of you have had HSV-2 for at least a year, then the chances of auto-inoculation (spreading it to other parts of your body) are very small. Just avoid sexy time during actual outbreaks of course (but you can still play intimacy games where that area is "off limits") ... Super sexy!
  21. Take it slow and talk about it from a grounded place with your boyfriend. Let him know about your anxieties from a place of caring about him and his sexual health. Don't let yourself spiral about it. Stay positive and optimistic. Herpes is rarely the cause of disconnection; it tends to be more about our ideas about having herpes that can disconnect. After all, genital HSV-1 specifically is much less likely to transmit genital-to-genital than HSV-2, so the chance of your boyfriend getting genital HSV-1 through genital sex is minimal at best. In fact, Terri Warren told me once she has never seen
  22. My girlfriend wants to do oral on me and "swallow". I know for vaginal sex definitely we'd have to use a condom, but not sure for oral. I know HSV2 prefers the genital area. Would it be better for her to just use her hands to avoid the extended oral contact and then just make me "finish" in her mouth? The "swallowing" thing apparently is important to her because she's persistent with it. So is it in semen? Having the green light to just "do it" sounds too good to be true. So I'd like to know how to do this safely. Thank you. (I was diagnosed more than 10 years ago and I'm asymptomatic)
  23. Think of it less like a continuum from low to high and more like a yes/no to having herpes or not. More or less antibodies don't mean more or less herpes.
  24. Herpes blood tests are frustrating to say the least. Unfortunately the most common ones give unclear results, commonly giving false positives and false negatives. For a definitive result, get a Western Blot test. Here is more details about herpes blood testing.
  25. Touching yourself and then touching him is fine (when you aren't having an outbreak, of course) since asymptomatic viral shedding is random and only sheds enough virus to potentially be spread via direct skin-to-skin friction. (Check out the free e-book and handouts to see the rates of viral shedding.) And no worries about you spreading your HSV-1 to your own mouth by giving your partner oral sex. What you're asking about there is called auto-inoculation, and it's actually harder to do than you might think (except in extreme circumstances like touching the fluid of an active outbreak then
  26. The truth is, it's impossible to tell where the original site of infection was (and hence where you are contagious) without an actual outbreak that is swabbable. So the doctor should have said that instead of saying you don't have any STIs. (Which gets into a whole other cockamamy discussion around how something isn't an STI when it's on your lip, but it becomes an STI if it traverses below the belt.) This is the gray area a lot of people are in who get a blood test but haven't had an identifiable outbreak. The best thing to do is to tell future partners exactly these details that you shared h
  27. Please don't let that mindset get the best of you. I held onto that mindset for way too long. And it crippled me. If I kept believing that, then I wouldn't have met the woman who is now my wife and the mother of our child. It feels like a big risk to put ourselves out there in general, then having herpes feels like it amplifies that risk of being rejected. But if we're honest with ourselves, we've always had that fear of rejection. So if we can use herpes as leverage to excavate our own vulnerability, knowing that the person we are meant to be with will see our hearts, our integrity, our trust
  28. IgM is certainly horribly unreliable, but IgG isn't too much better. Both carry false positives and false negatives. To be sure, look into getting the Western Blot, which is the gold standard in herpes blood testing: https://www.herpesopportunity.com/post/herpes-tests
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