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nicola12

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Everything posted by nicola12

  1. I found out a while ago that I have hsv2 and I unknowingly infected my new boyfriend. Fortunately, after a few fights and heated discussions, we're still together. So since we'd like to get intimate again, seeing that sex is an important part of the relationship...what I'd like to know is if we can go ahead and have unprotected sex seeing that we're both already infected. I will ask my doctor but for now, I'd like to know. Especially oral sex or is that off the table?
  2. I recently found out I was infected with hsv2 about 4 months ago. Being 23 and now starting in life, especially sexually, having herpes can seem like the end of your world. I started seeing a guy that I really like and I decided to get tested. Unfortunately, we did this backwards. We had unprotected sex thinking we were both clean in health. I mean, there were no physical signs. I went a few weeks later to get tested. Yup... you know the rest. My life has been downhill from there. One, I have no idea how/when I got infected. Was it him? Did I get it from someone else on one of my stupid nightouts? I'll never know. But I feel as though I gave it to him. I've had numerous sexual partners, I'm no saint. Sure I've used condoms but anything could've happened. I've been depressed more than ever. Of course I disclosed my status to him as soon as i found out. I recently moved to another country, so I sent him a text message because I was scared shitless to tell him via skype or even a call. I was such a coward. I knew what his reaction would've been so I took the easy way out. He ignored me for a few weeks but now he talks to me every now and then. He still refuses to get tested though. Maybe he's in denial. I told him I was going back to his neck of the woods in a few weeks and he accepted to meet me to talk. Maybe there is potential for us to start up again but it all depends on how he feels when he sees me. To be honest, I'm scared. Not even sure I want to go. During these last few months, I got my first outbreak, I swore my heart dropped. Or atleast, what I thought was my first. Because now I'm more vigilent down there more than ever. My mind was racing. I had to lay down and take a minute. As an overthinker, it was 2x worse the way my mind was racing. I'm a 2nd-year med student, I consider myself averagely pretty, great personality... How can I be myself now that I have an incurable STD?... And disclose all of this to my family and/or potential boyfriend(s)? My self-esteem has completely gone through the door. I told two of my closest girlfriends about my current predicament. They said all the right things but they don't get it. My choices, my world... just became so much more limited. So I started googling and I found this great site. Real people with real experiences and I must say I feel a bit better reading some of these stories. You are all so brave. I really hope I can go back to that point in my life where I'm once again confident. Kinda hard to do in this stigma world we live in. You know, I beat myself up every day. I'm a future doctor for crying out loud. How did I let this happen to me? I'm a paradox. I don't know. I just needed to put my thoughts down. Thanks for reading if you've gotten this far.
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