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New2GH

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New2GH last won the day on July 24 2018

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  1. @pecan, Hi pecan, I don't think it's anyone's place to tell you how you should or should not be handling this nor should anyone be sizing up how you handle the virus versus how anyone else handles the virus. Herpes affects us all differently (both emotionally and physically) and sometimes forums such as these are the only outlet we've got. I think some people just don't want to hear such a somber reality when it comes to the virus and instead are bent on keeping things light and fluffy to suit their needs. I think you have a right to express yourself and be heard and not be made to feel like you've got issues with getting a grip. So please don't apologize. You are going through a lot and have other things you are dealing with to add to the mix (like many of us do). So as long as you are not violating this forum's guidelines then post away without apologies of any kind. Lots of people read posts on this site daily and you never know when your story can help someone else. I do hope you will be able to get the western blot issue sorted out somehow even if it means shopping around for a doctor that will listen to you and order the test. Sending you some positive vibes and just know that your story matters and that you should be able to tell it the way you want to.
  2. @Shortcake, Hi, was the tingling constant for you? How long did you have the tingling for? Thanks!
  3. @Ubikwity Every time I read a post or response of yours it soothes my soul. Thank you for being you and sharing your wonderful self with us 🙂.
  4. I'm glad you brought that up because I've definitely caught her contradicting herself. My gut says I caught it within the three months preceding onset of symptoms (with my last possible exposure being four days before symptoms began). I could fall into the common scenario of having symptoms 2-10 days post last exposure but also could fall into scenario where symptoms appeared from an exposure that was almost three months old (I had several partners during that 3-month period). Prior to those three months I was celibate for about half a year without any kind of symptom. So that's why I'm thinking my infection was recent or within three months or so of diagnosis. Otherwise I've been carrying it for a very long time and it only decided to mess with me when it did. All possible scenarios. I'll never know and I don't speak to any of my past partners and (with what I know now) wouldn't trust anyone to tell me the truth anyway.
  5. Hello @bonnie_1987, My igG index value was a 10.40 and when I asked Terri Warren if I had a recent infection she told me it was likely an older/established infection at that index value. As you know this is a common question and so Terri's answer is usually that index values such as ours are not likely to be recent infections. I hope that helps. You can check out her forum (if you haven't done so already) and read her responses to this very question from others. Take care.
  6. @Ishmael, you know that it's not just unethical to me. IT'S UNETHICAL PERIOD! I would ask anyone else who is reading this to chime in but this is not my thread. You are advocating for non-disclosure (within a certain context) on this forum. Don't you think it's a slap in the face to other users here that were on the receiving end of non-disclosure within that context?? Really?? I guess you are saying that they should have known better? Ramble away if you must but, as I mentioned previously, I'm not taking anything that you have to say to heart.
  7. Even if she's never had sores/an outbreak she could still be contagious through viral shedding. Why should she not disclose?? @mr_hopp, could you please chime in here? Thank you.
  8. Hi @RainyGal, maybe you can find this sheet useful in regards to transmission. I hope all is well.
  9. @Ishmael You have been caught red-handed and you are just trying your best to save face here. You could man up and admit that you did suggest to another user on this site (RainyGal, link to that post provided in this thread) that you would NOT disclose and instead carry on like normal if you were in her shoes (positive only for HSV 1 through blood test and never any sores anywhere). It's as clear as daylight in your response to her. Slice it any way you want. In my book this is something that is UNETHICAL and therefore leads me to question the ethics of the person who would suggest non-disclosure in this context, or any other context for that matter. She cannot know for sure if her infection is oral or genital and she is contagious either way because of viral shedding. Your response was the only response to RainyGal's thread and she may have decided to take what you said you would do in her case and run with it, putting others at risk. Could her next partner be one of the 20% that doesn't have HSV 1? Absolutely! Doesn't that 20% deserve a voice here? Heck, even if 99% had HSV 1 I would still advocate that the remaining 1% should still have a say. But maybe that's just me. ANYHOW, moving forward the whole reason I brought all this up was to convey to @benzgtx (and really anyone else for that matter) to not take to heart any advice or criticism that is coming from someone whose ethics are in question. I know I wouldn't! @benzgtxI'm sorry that your thread was hijacked. It most certainly was not my intention. But for what it's worth you are getting a lot of views!
  10. @Ishmael, so then people that don't get cold sores don't have to tell their partners even if they know they are infected with type one via blood test?? A yes or no will suffice.
  11. @Lelianney Wow your story breaks my heart. Herpes definitely has it out more for some than others. It definitely had it out for me and since my diagnosis almost a year ago it has been a hell of a ride. You are definitely justified and entitled to vent and be heard. I hope that someone with a more similar experience to yours will chime in with perhaps some words of encouragement for whatever that's worth. Sometimes just letting it out helps, and I hope you felt at least a little better after you clicked submit.
  12. @Ishmael, So the message you are conveying is that it's okay for someone who has oral HSV1 to not disclose since it's common in the population?
  13. @Ishmael As we know, a positive blood test for type one only tells us we have it but not where we have it. And as we also know it is becoming more and more common to have type one genitally. So there is no way to know for sure without sores and only a positive blood test for type one. If I didn't already know I had it genitally, I would disclose that I have it and that it could be oral or genital. I would want to protect the other 20 per cent that don't have it.
  14. @benzgtx, Geez mister, you really ruffled some feathers with this post! But as someone who also has HSV-related neurological issues, I can totally understand your frustration and need to vent. Sometimes forums like these are the only places we are left with to do so. Honestly, I scared most people in my personal life away (longtime friends, close family) when I tried to reach out and tell them what I've been going through. It's sad, but most people are just not interested in dealing with such raw and real emotions, or dealing with anyone who is in the dumps. It's a buzz kill, it gets in the way of a good time. So it's no surprise you got some backlash. Basically people just want to conveniently water herpes down to just a "skin condition" and don't care to hear about the darker side of herpes since most people won't be as unfortunate as we both are to, not only live with the stigma, but live with HSV-related health issues as well. Perhaps sharing atypical HSV experiences scares most HSV folks unnecessarily, BUT I think it also helps them to put things into perspective (that at least they don't have the issues that we have in addition to the usual things that come with being diagnosed with HSV). I know that if I didn't have atypical symptoms I would have looked at your story in that way and been very thankful that HSV wasn't causing me so much trouble. Also, I'm sure that down the road some other poor soul who's been atypically impacted by HSV might find your thread and reach out and you can help them out through their difficult time. It is bound to happen and to me that would make your post worth it even if you aren't "offering" anything at the moment. But either way, it's clear that people want things to be kept light and fluffy in here. It's okay though, I'm here for you even if you come across as pessimistic because I understand where you are coming from. Feel free to private message me anytime, heck I"ll even give you my number if you ever want to talk. I'm here for you and for what it is worth I hope that somehow, someway your condition improves so you can get back to a normal life. That's all that I want for myself as well. PS.. As for you being called out for being pessimistic or negative just beware that some of these same people that are pointing the finger are downright condoning or partaking in non-disclosure, so I question their ethics. I'm of the mindset that when someone points a finger at someone they are pointing three back at themselves. If I had to choose between an unethical or pessimistic person, I would go for the pessimistic person any day. But that's just me 🙂.
  15. @benzgtx, Thank you for your real, raw, and honest post about the lesser heard of yet devastating effects this virus can have on some of us. I myself have been suffering from neurological issues going back to about two weeks before diagnosis (eleven months as of yesterday and counting!). To say that the past year has been a living hell for me is an understatement. Prior to this I was a happy-go-lucky man full of life. Now I'm just a shell of the man that I was. This has affected every facet of my life. I joined this forum and Terri's forum to learn all I can about herpes but also to see if anyone had gone through the symptoms that I have. I did find a few but it took months as my herpes presentation is atypical. However most of those people were no longer active on these forums so I couldn't get a hold of most of them. Anyway, yes herpes isn't necessarily just a skin condition for some of us. I've read hundreds if not over a thousand posts at this point about herpes symptoms and if it is one thing I've learned is that all bets are off when it comes to this virus. It acts in so many different ways in different people. And yes, the psychological toll it takes is immense. If I could turn back time, I would have just remained celibate to be brutally and truthfully honest. I happen to be one of those that (because of fear of contracting an STD) didn't fully partake in all the sex that I would have liked to. And still I ended up here. My best friend spent the past two decades sticking his d*ck in any hole he can find and yet he gets to walk away unscathed!!! Shows you how f*cked up and grossly unfair this world is! Had I known that someone performing oral on me could cause infection even without sores I wouldn't be in this lifelong boat that's I'm in now. I get that we should be here to uplift and put things into perspective. But it's also important to know herpes for what it is: a lifelong, incurable viral infection of the nerves/nervous system. As such, neurological issues are possible/plausible. Anyhow, I'll continue to hope for the best for both our situations. And yes, in case anyone wonders, I've been to a bunch of doctors and specialists and gotten a bunch of stuff done (numerous labs, MRI, nerve study, etc.) to rule out other possible causes to no avail. I am otherwise a healthy person that leads a very healthy lifestyle.
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