KittenP

Ok, whoa. No, we aren't going to do anything without him first talking to his wife. My question was what activities can we do that won't transmit HSV 2. Yes, I'm on suppressive meds and I know with condom use the risk is low. But it's still there. And if his wife isn't ok with taking on that risk, I respect that. But there has to be some things we can do with no risk. For example, if I were to give him a hand job that is not going to transmit HSV 2 to him, correct? Aren't there other things he and I can do that are sexual but no risk? Another thing I can think of is spanking. We have a D/s dynamic. I'm looking for suggestions like those so that he and I can still enjoy intimacy but maintain his wife's boundaries if she tells him she wants them.

I have HSV 2 for over 20 yrs and have been with my husband that enitre time. We are fluid bonded. But we just opened up our marriage and I now have a new partner and the two of us are also deeply in love. I disclosed my HSV 2 status prior to us meeting in person and he didn't have much of a reaction. Now that we've gone on a few dates and have done some making out, I brought it up again to ask what he's comfortable with and what his thoughts/questions/concerns are. He told me he dated someone with HSV2 a while back and his wife wasn't ok with him exposing himself to ANY risk. So he wants to navigate this carefully. Here are my quesrions: 1. What are the sexual activities we can do that won't put him at risk at all? For example, I can use my hand on him. Can he on me? What things can he do to me with 100% safety? 2. Can anyone give me a link to reliable statistics on risk with using condoms? And dental dams? Thank you everyone. We're deeply in love. We've known each other years. And now that we've finally gotten together we want this to work in a way that makes him AND his wife feel safe.