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Everything posted by Sumshine

  1. You could have gotten H prior to marrying your husband provided you had sex with others before marrying him. It can lay dormant for years and its possible you never passed it to him. I never passed it to my late husband. Or, if your husband didn't specifically ask for the herpes test to be included in his std testing, they could have excluded it. That is very common, I have no idea why
  2. @NJRunnerMomI totally agree with you. I plan to use conventional dating as I feel like you do. If they are into you, H doesn't matter
  3. @JuneBSorry for the delay. In the first 15 years I did not use anti viral meds. The last 10 years, I did. We were very careful. He had absolutely no problem using condoms which was entirely his choice and we also had more oral sex than anything (who doesn't like that) whereby the transmission rate is almost nothing orally
  4. Hi! It's extremely rare to get hvs2 orally.. I'm mean, the risk is something like 1%.
  5. I'm a veteran 35 plus years. I should know all there is to know lol.. however, it does seem that I read that the longer you've had H, the less you shed, but I can't seem to locate that answer. So, the question is: does the virus she'd less the longer you've had it aside from anti-viral meds. Thanks!
  6. "Positive singles" and "Mpwh are the most popular. You don't have to post a picture, but it definitely helps. There is a feature that allows people to apply for access to your private photos at your discretion.. in other words, your photos can remain private! I think this feature is common on most online dating sites. I just want to reiterate, I got this at age 23.....I'm 62 now. Conventional dating with disclosing was the ONLY option. I had numerous, steady relationships prior to meeting my late husband. I've had a wonderful life full of travel, beautiful home, excellent career, wonderful family and friends! I may also say that there's no reason to tell anyone about your status unless you are sleeping with them. It's really no one's business unless you want to share it.
  7. I'm sorry this has happened, but your life isn't over! You'll be just fine and you will find someone who either has H or who doesn't care that you have it. I've had this a very, very long time (35 plus years) and have found that there are a lot of decent people on the H dating sites!!! After all, we are all good people!!!! I would suggest trying it, but don't just limit yourself to it. I married a herpes negative man who has now passed, be he didn't care about H because he was so in love with me. It happens! He never aquired H from me after 25 years and we had a fantastic sex life!
  8. Are there any new topics on here from this year or am I navigating this site incorrectly? Thanks
  9. Have you tried switching to acyclovir?? I would definitely give it a try. I started on Valtrex about 10 years ago as my first experience with antiviral (I've had hvs2 for over 30 years) and I had constant prodrome symptoms on valtrex. I switched to acyclovir and never had another outbreak or any other issues
  10. My late husband of 25 years never got H from me. I've always disclosed as I've had ghs2 for almost 35 years. I've never passed it on that I'm aware of. I've remained friends with most of the people from my past. The right person isn't going to care about H
  11. I was married to a wonderful man for 25 years who didn't care I had H. He passed away March 31st 2020. He never aquired it from me. There are plenty of people who aren't going to care about H if they care about you. That's the bottom line!!! He loved me and never even mentioned H other than to say " I'll be the last person you ever have to tell." I'm still young and will definitely be disclosing my status as I have since age 23. If someone doesn't accept it, they aren't the one!
  12. Don't beat yourself up over it. The chances of you passing it to him is extremely low given how long you've had it and you used a condom. I never passed this to my late husband of 25 years. We had him tested yearly. When he comes back, sit him down and tell him. Don't cry or freak, just tell him. Also, tell him the chance if him getting it was extremely low. Are you on anti viral? If so it was only 2% risk of him getting it from you. Just educate him and see what happens.
  13. So, I went to Terri Warren's question and answer forum and found the answer to my question. I was almost sure I read in her book, that I no longer have that if you only have ghvs2 you are highly unlikely to ever aquire oral or ghvs1. So, now we know lol. Thank you for responding though. If you go to her forum and pose this question in the search box, it will take you to her answering this exact question
  14. Thank you! I'm asking because a potential partner has 1 and 2, but has never had an outbreak and has no idea if his hvs 1 is genital or oral. He's never had a cold sore.
  15. Hi! I've had this literally forever lol. 35 plus years and have read about everything there is to read and actually have never passed this on to anyone not even my late husband of 25. I have hvs2 genital can I get hvs 1 too? Thanks!
  16. I understand! I just feel like since, obviously people are getting herpes in India, that they'd have some sort of outlet.
  17. Can you join a herpes dating site in India? If so, maybe you could meet someone that way. It's just a thought.
  18. He was so crazy about me that he just didn't care about the H at all. His first response was " can't you just put a band aid on it??" I said "well, yes, that would be a condom!!" He absolutely 100% did not care at all to wear a condom. He never one time complained about it. We had oral sex 95% of the time.....who doesn't like that. When we had regular sex, he wore a condom which was purely his choice. We did this until I started the anti viral, and then he never wore a condom after that. I had had H 20 years before he and I got together so my viral shedding was already significantly lower which happens after having it for so long. So, in addition to the low viral shedding, the anti viral cut it down even more. We had a very normal life together and great sex life. I think if someone really cares about you, H doesn't matter. Now he's gone and I'm still young (62) and in excellent condition. I still workout religiously and am certain (at some point) I'll be disclosing again. I'm just not worried about it at all.
  19. Sorry, I don't get on here much at all. My outbreaks were very much the same over the years until I started anti viral. Nothing terrible, but I wanted no outbreaks! I have not had one since I started the meds. It's been over 5 years now.....I think.
  20. It sounds like your Dr is grasping at straws. If you never had cold sores (you or your husband) then that's out the window. Yes, you could have had this a very long time (from another relationship) and it has been dormant, that's definitely a possibility. Do you know if your husband has been faithful 100%? If so, sit him down and tell him! If there aren't trust issues in your marriage, why would he think you cheated?? Especially if you are discussing this with him. I hope everything works out for the best. I think you have to bring it up. Best of luck to you❤
  21. So, I've had H since I was 23. I'm 61 now. I disclosed every time before sex and really didn't have too many problems at all with men not accepting it. I had one guy say he needed to think about it. He came back two weeks later and we dated for several months. I then met my late husband (he just passed away 4 months ago) who was head over heals in love with me and said he would be the last person I'd ever have to tell. He was correct. We almost made it 24 years married. He never got H from me. We had him checked every year. We mostly had oral sex (90 % of the time), but when we had intercorse, he chose to wear a condom (totally his choice)....then when i started anti viral meds, I had no more outbreaks at all and we stopped the condoms. I am now facing dating at some point. Not ready just yet as I'm still mourning. However, I am extremely fit as I weight train 5 days a week. I eat clean and take several supplements along with anti viral. From past experience, don't freak when you disclose. If you freak and cry and carry on, then they will definitely freak too. Just be frank and a bit matter of fact because it really is not a big deal. Remember to include in your disclosure that you are safer knowing you have this than all the other people who have no idea they have it! I've just been surfing some of the positive singles sites and trust me, there are millions out there with H and a lot of awesome people to choose from from lawyers, teachers, doctors. Ceo's etc normal people just like us
  22. Perfectly stated! I'm in this almost 40 years....was in my early 20's when I found out. Hvs2!!! What the hell?? I went through all the emotions as well. I had all positive disclosures which led to the man I've been with 22 years now. He is negative!!! We are careful! Just wanted to say I've lived and still am living a great life full of travel, friends and family😊
  23. I've had hvs2 for almost 40 years. I rarely ever think about it. I have never had a negative disclosure. I've only had to disclose a few times and ended up with a lifetime partner who could care less about herpes and has never acquired it from me. I NEVER made it a big deal because, for me, it's not!!! I have hvs 2. Yes, I had lots of ob's in the first couple of years. In time, they have all but stopped. It has not kept me from doing one thing in my life! I have a great career, spouse, family and life long friends. Have traveled the world. I've had a great sex life and have never passed this on. So, for me.....it's a very tiny, tiny part of my life.
  24. First off...he has no basis to sue. He chose unprotected sex rather than to go across the street to get a condom. He should have brought one because it sounded like he planned on sex come hell or high water. Then, when the glove broke, he just kept going! I'm sorry, but he sounds like a jerk to me. How does he know he doesn't have H since he seemed to not want to bother with a condom....probably his usual practice. The encounter likely did not transmit to him
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