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Sumshine

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Posts posted by Sumshine

  1. I've disclosed for 41 years. Lost my husband close to 4 years ago whom I also disclosed to many years ago (over 30). Once I disclose, I feel I've done my part. I do, obviously, do my part to keep them safe, however, if anyone was to aquire it, I'd feel 100% that I did all the right things and everything I could to avoid passing it on and would not beat myself up over them acquiring it. 

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  2. I lost my husband of 27 years 3 and 1/2 years ago. I disclosed to him and he told me he'd be the last person I'd ever have to tell, and he was until he passed. I've had this 41 years and have disclosed more times than I can count. I am a female, I keep myself in excellent shape (not sure if that has helped) and have never had an issue with the disclosure. I am about to disclose to somebody that I met recently. I will do it matter of factly and give him the transmission information right from this site. He will either accept it or he won't! And I will move on either with him or without! I'm a very blessed woman. I have amazing family and friends and my life is completely full! I'm happy to have a companion to experience life with, but I'm also happy to do things on my own. Life is exactly what we make it!

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  3. And just think......one out of 4 of all those people who ridiculed you, have herpes!!! I think that's the stats. Good grief! It's hard to believe there are that many ignorant people out there!!! I've had this 41 years and have disclosed countless times and can't believe someone would be so deceiving. My late husband said he'd be the last person I'd ever have to tell, and he was until he passed. I recently had a relationship with someone who actually had H too. We no longer date, but I'll be disclosing soon to another man I've recently met.  I just tell them mater of factly, answer any questions they have, give them the transmission facts right here from this site and move on! Best of luck to you in your future! 

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  4. Wow! I'm so sorry it didn't work out! I've disclosed my entire adult life (got H at age 23) and really never had anyone say no to a relationship. Having said that, I got H over 40 years ago when there was no internet!! So, I definitely think the internet has hurt the H world in that there are so many horror stories out there about Herpes! It scares people! In reality, you don't ever die from it!!! My late husband loved me so much that when I told him I had H, he just said "can't you put a bandaid on it?" Lol!!! I said "yes, that would be your condom!" He ran to the store, got condoms and we never looked back! 27 years together (25 married) and he never got it from me! 

  5. It's not the end of the world!!! I've had H for 40 years. Had an awesome marriage to my late husband. We were together 27 years total. 2 living together and 25 married. He was H negative! He never got it from me. Get control over your life and move on. It's not life threatening! It's not going to kill you!  You have a child to raise! Go out and have a good life! It's what you make it! Life goes on! I'm dating again 3 years after my husband's passing. I'm building my dream home! Move forward my friend!

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  6. Hi! My late husband never aquired my hsv2 and we were married 25 years plus lived together first. Once I told him of my status and we talked about it, he said he'd be the last person I ever had to tell. We had him tested every year. We had oral sex most of the time (transmission rate is less than 1% to his oral cavity that way) and who doesn't like oral!!! There are ways around transmission. You can get him to read the book written by Terri Warren called "the good news about the bad news." She's an expert on H. She's had many relationships with men with herpes and has never gotten it. It's a small book and sn easy read. If he continues to bring you down, I'd tell him "if you can't move past this, then you need to move on!" 

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  7. My late husband of 26 years (25 married and one living together) and I chose to use a condom during intercorse (totally his choice) and nothing while doing oral sex. It worked absolutely perfect for us. I went on anti viral about 8 years before he passed and we used nothing after that. We had a great sex life and he never aquired H from me. We never felt cheated or any less intimate doing it how we chose to. It's so rare to pass it orally, so we rolled with that 90% of the time!

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  8. I decided to put it in my online dating profile just to see how it goes. I just put "I aquired hvs2 at age 23, feel free to ask me about it."   I'm new to online dating as well as dating in general as I was married 25 years to a herpes negative man who passed away almost 2 years ago. I always just disclosed my status prior to meeting my husband and really had no problems. I have decided to use this approach to see how it goes and to weed out people......they can just keep scrolling if not interested! I have been on the dating site almost a month and have had 3 men who are interested. Of the 3, I met two. One is extremely nice, but no chemistry the other one I really like and we are going on our 3rd date tonight! Both of these men knew a lot about herpes and basically just asked questions and in the end, wanted to continue dating. I take very good care of myself and am into weight traing (20 years now) which really helps me with confidence (I am very comfortable in my own skin) and takes care of any undue stress! We'll see how things unfold! Prior to computers lol....40 years ago. I waited until I felt a mutual attraction and knew things were trending towards a  more affectionate relationship 

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  9. From what I understand, the primary oral hvs2 outbreak is usually the only outbreak you'll have orally. Have you both thought of going to the Westover heights website run by Terri Warren? You can read the 1000's of questions that have been asked and answered by her for free. You can also pay to have your questions answered. She is an expert on herpes. Your question may have already been asked and answered on her site

  10. Hi! I've been on here if and on. I try to be encouraging as I'm a 40 year veteran of Hvs2. I've had a wonderful life aside from losing my husband of 25 years in early 2020. I thought he'd be the last person I would ever disclose to, but God had other plans. He never gave my H status a 2nd thought and never aquired it from me. I recently joined a dating site whereby I have chosen to disclose my status in my profile. I have 3 dates lined up with men I have spoken to by phone and and who all have heard if it, but just wanted to be educated on the subject. We'll see how it goes. I've never made a big deal out of H and it certainly doesn't rule my life! It isn't just up to these men to accept me, I have a choice in this too!

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  11. I just want to jump in as a white female who was given H at age 23 and I'm 63 now. You are all wonderful people who have a ton to offer!!! Hold your head high and own the notion that you are wonderful human beings. I promise someone will come along and not give a rats about your H status! It will happen. My late husband of 25 years (26 all together) didn't give H two thoughts as he was so in love with me. He never acquired herpes from me as we were very careful. I never felt it necessary to tell anyone I wasn't sleeping with about my status.  I disclosed a lot In my days leading up to marriage as there was no choice. No online dating and no computers! You just disclosed and went on. Most men just asked me to educate them. I've had an absolute amazing life and I don't expect that to change now.  I'm in excellent shape via weight training, I'm intelligent, out going own a farm and retired early. I have a lot to offer and I'm worth someone's time!!! I'm equally as happy on my own as well. 

     

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  12. I don't have an answer, but it's so rare to get hvs2 orally. I mean, it can happen, of course, but gosh it's extremely rare that it would happen during a one time event and that you would get hvs2 genitally as well from one encounter. Did the Dr's elaborate at all as to what it could be, if it's not herpes??

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  13. The chances of you getting H in your mouth from oral is extremely low. I think 1% and that's from someone who has it genital. My late husband and I had mostly oral for 25 years. I am positive and he was negative. I never passed it to him. We had him checked annually. 

  14. You could have gotten H prior to marrying your husband provided you had sex with others before marrying him. It can lay dormant for years and its possible you never passed it to him. I never passed it to my late husband. Or, if your husband didn't specifically ask for the herpes test to be included in his std testing, they could have excluded it. That is very common, I have no idea why

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