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Hard2believe

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  1. I believe my ex is the culprit too. When the nurse told me that with an antibody count as high as mine I've probably had it for sometime and BOTH of the fellas I've been with gladly welcomed me to go them to their appointment, which each requested, to share their results with me... the ex is the one who stands out to me too. Thanks so much for responding!
  2. Oh yeah...I would definitely suspect he's your source too. Neither one of the two I've been with have had breakouts while I've been with them. My counts were so high, that nurse said I've had it for a few to several years more than likely. I asked her if it was unusual for women over 40 to come in with their first breakout. She said that, actually, she's seen more women from ages 40 to mid-60's than any other age range over the last 5 years. She went onto say that there's no explanation why I've gone so long without my first breakout, but some go years before the first and years between them.
  3. That's what I thought, but I made them both take me with them to the different health departments where they each were tested. I wouldn't accept results except from the source and in person. My ex is the only one left who could've given it to me through his affairs and that exposure. I'm just shocked it took this long to appear. That's what baffles me. My iGg results were high to the point that the nurse stated that I've probably had it a long time due to the high count I have. Thanks for responding!
  4. Hey guys. My life has never been textbook, but has been incredible over the last almost 7 years...until two months ago when the unexplainable occurred. I'd love to hear your thoughts. (Grab a cup of coffee and get comfy for this one!) Six years ago, after being married for 20 years and having two kids along the way, I finally get the courage to leave. Back up years prior to me leaving...even after the many affairs he had begun as early as two months into the marriage, I was determined to win him over and make the best of things. My firstborn came 13 months later. Fast forward 20 years, several affairs, and another beautiful child later... both kids are older with one in college and the other in high school begging me to leave their father. I realize the 6 figures and set retirement aren't worth my constant emotional pain, anquish, depression and heart medications, and high level of stress. So, I leave with the younger child. This was a pivotal moment in my life. From that point, and for the next year, I was in the most heightened state of stress I've ever encountered in my life...yet, no b.o. or any signs or even a hint of any std. I meet a wonderful man a year later. We fell in love. We were involved for 5 years and they were highly stressful. What I didn't know when we were first dating was that he was headlong into a drug addiction. No physical signs to have given me warning of this. (No needles, he smoked and ingested it) So, before I finally realized the addict must be the one to finally reach out for help, I found myself on a mission to help him out of that darkness. He finally got the help he needed 3 years ago and remains clean and sober now. Unfortunately, during the last three years of his clean time, he was still being what is called a 'dry addict', which includes sneaking around with active users, mostly females, and keeping them as what is called 'reservations'. If you've ever been to an NA meeting as a support person, you'll know what I'm talking about. This timeframe was the second most stressful one in my life...yet, no b.o. at all. In fact, still no signs of anything and we tested yearly... everything was always negative. Ten months ago, the only man I had known since the breakup of my 20 year marriage and I decide to take a break. We were both tired and my life was about to completely change as I had just graduated from college and had an amazing position in a medical facility waiting over an hour away. My life was changing and I was excited. One month, several texts, and one call later...I found myself sitting in a restaurant one night staring into the eyes of the love of my life...whom I had met and dated 31 years prior...and who never left my heart. We've now been together for 9 months and we're happy, but it's not been without it's own challenges bc of our separate life experiences through the years. Here's where things took a bizarre turn and have brought me here to this forum...two months ago, my back started aching as if my sciatic was about to flare up. This was nothing unusual. I also started feeling like I was going to have a cold, but it never developed. Again, nothing unusual. My bf and I spend a weekend together. After the first night of that weekend, I found myself on the toilet holding my sephora foundation powder compact mirror underneath my..."kitty"...for lack of a better term without using my medical terminology...with my hand almost touching the water in the toilet. I had felt something a slight bit painful on the very edge of the vaginal opening when wiping off... and, yes, I flushed first before scoping things out. There was only one bump without a head or papule, or vesicle. So, having never seen anything like this before, and having been fanatic about knowing everything going on with my body and health for years, I reach for the only thing I have with me to make this thing go away...camphor and neosporin (I swear by those and vic's vapor rub... which I didn't use at that moment thankfully...that would give an entirely new meaning to the crass term "hot twot".) The bump got more painful by the next day. I immediately went to the health clinic. They burst the one bump as now it had a clear head on it. I believe that hurt worse than anything about it. They cultured it, went ahead and put me on valtrex, and called me 3 days later with the results. I'm now positive for hsv2. Everything else, the gamut, was negative. Here's where things have become quite interesting and where I'd love to hear your thoughts. I've had the only two men I've been with, since being married, get tested for everything, including having the iGg blood test for hsv2 and mouth swab for hsv1...twice and two months between each round of tests. They've both provided me with their original test results from their respective health departments. THEY'RE BOTH NEGATIVE FOR BOTH HSV1 AND HSV2. My current bf and I even had sex the very night before that lovely little bump showed its face. They're both negative! Okay, so how is it the only two men, with one having gone through a very high risk lifestyle for several years and the other being obsessive about his health and had even broken up with an emt (prior to his 10 year marriage with his ex) bc there was just a possibility of a needle stick exposure...both be negative and I'm positive? I've been through way more stress during my marriage and going through medical school than anything that precipitated that b.o. Now, you might be thinking that the only guy left is my ex. The only parting gift he left me with was the cancer causing strain of hpv, which self eradicated two years after we split up and having surgery to remove the issue it tried to cause...and the first man I was with, post split from the ex, at the time tested negative for that as well. So...how is it that I'm the only one with this? It's the unexplainable. I've never cheated on anyone I've ever been with. I've been on the receiving end of that kind of activity and refuse to cause it for someone else, plus my conscious would kill me. So, put that thought out of your minds. Yes, I'm one of the few left who value monogamy. So, I continue to take my valtrex every morning and go about my life, forgetting I even have this most of the time. There's only been the one bump, that one time so far. Btw...having "the talk" was more than difficult, but the love of my life chose to stay with me saying he would help in any way that I needed, would study about the disease and treatments, and that we would get through it together. So, life hasn't ended bc of this diagnosis. I'd love to hear your thoughts. Yes, I'm a closet novelist. I do apologize for the length of this post, but hope you enjoyed my story with my diagnosis.
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