22&Depressed

@Amando thank you! That’s what I thought! Dating someone in the same boat as you takes off so much anxiety wow

Hey there! Sooo this might be a silly question but I need clarity! I was diagnosed with GHSV1 in August. Minor OB and thankfully I have not had another or any signs or symptoms since. I recently started dating someone who has OHSV1 (a long history of it) and I was wondering...if they perform oral on me, can that trigger an OB? Im not having an OB and its unlikely I will have one this weekend (when we see each other) but if they already have the virus too, can they get an OB from that? Also, do we know what the chances are of transmission via sex if they already have a long history of HSV1 in their system? With a condom? Without? I don't plan on ever taking antivirals unless it ever turns into a persistent issue! Thanks in advance!!!

Type 1 is significantly better. You may never have an OB again and if you do, it'll likely be once or twice a year (IF that). The shedding rates are a lot less and it is nearly impossible to transfer it genital to genital. Be happy 🙂

I know how you feel. I got diagnosed with GHSV1 in August and I fell into a very deep depression. I didn’t leave my apartment for about 2.5 weeks, my family almost had me committed for the things I was saying to them, I thought my life was over. It gets better with time. It hasn’t even been that long and I already feel so much better just from doing a lot of research. My whole family has HSV1 but orally and guess what? We actually have better statistics than them! They both OB nearly once every other month (30 and 55) whereas our recurrences and rates of transmission to others genitals’ is way less. We have a more MILD version of the ‘cold sore’ virus just on another body part. That’s the truth and hopefully thinking like that will make you feel better. Some days I completely forget I have it, other days are worse where I panic...so it comes and goes! But for the most part, I’ve realized it’s practically a non issue. Reach out whenever if you need to talk

I have this too. It’s dishydrotic eczema. I had from long before I got GHSV1

That’s okay! That’s what I was trying to say. Its like, if anyone has MORE so of an obligation (though everyone should have the same obligation), it should be those who have oral HSV1. Thanks for addressing that 😊

So only if she has a reason to believe it’s genital she should disclose? Isn’t that the double standard and stigma we’re trying to eliminate? Especially given the fact that it recurs more/sheds more/is more likely to transmit from the oral location? This is the problem. No one thinks anyone who has HSV1 is obliged to disclose when they are the ones spreading it to genitals. The logic in this is absurd. And what you said above perpetuates it. Im not attacking you at all I’m just pointing out that this is the very issue in society that makes those who have (really) the better combo of HSV1 and it’s location feel worse about themselves. I had a tough time coming to terms with disclosing my HSV location but now that I have because I want to, others who do have GHSV1 shouldn’t feel that they have to disclose their same virus just because it’s on their genitals - EVERYONE should disclose. @RainyGal if you’ve never had an OB but test positive for it, I wouldn’t disclose. Unless you want to. In which case it could be something something done in passing.

@New2GH or just saying you haven't really experienced anything yet anywhere

@Amando @Elle27 thats the problem! They wouldn't walk away from someone who has cold sores and its the same thing but actually LESS of a risk. Its like they'd actually be significantly more at risk if I did have them orally...I just feel like if you have HSV1, you have HSV1. Its one virus. The fact that a certain location can throw people off is boggling. About letting someone decide for their own health, I totally agree and thats why I said Im 100% about telling people I carry the HSV1 virus. They can make their decision from there. But alas, its still a dilemma

Backstory: I got diagnosed with GHSV1 in August after a very mild outbreak (3 bumps, no pain, no tingling, no itching, no sickness, etc.). I have not had a recurrent outbreak since. Now that I am thinking about dating again, I am having a moral dilemma. I believe in disclosing you carry the virus. Whether it’s oral or genital, you are putting somewhat at a potential risk so ALWAYS disclose that you test positive for HSV. What I am on the fence about is disclosing *where* I get (got, as of now I don’t know if it’ll ever come back) the virus. At the end of the day, people who have it orally are putting others at WAY greater of a risk. I was recently speaking to a new guy and I told him I carry the HSV1 virus. He did not care at all as most people who say that and think of cold sores don’t make a big deal of it. To me, that is disclosing. I told them I have HSV1 and to look it up. They should be more cautious if I were to have it orally as that is 99/100 times the risk for transmission. They are assuming the risk if they accept it regardless of the location it manifests when I’m putting them at less of a risk than the 80% of the world carrying it orally who do or don’t know they even have it. What are your thoughts on disclosing you have HSV1 but not disclosing where? NOTE: I don’t feel like being flamed for this. I want to hear from others who have GHSV1 and what they think about this and what their policy on disclosure is. Also, please don’t say “if it’s not as big of a risk having it genitally, why don’t you just tell them where it is”. Unfortunately, most people are ignorant and just don’t understand these things unless you live through it.

Did they take a swab of it at the time to confirm its HSV1 and not HSV2? Yes, while GHSV1 is supposed to me milder than HSV2 and oral HSV1, I think it varies person to person so its still possible. I dont think theres any correct answer as to whether its normal to have 3 to 4 HSV1 outbreaks a month because of this - everyones body is different. I've read a lot of stories about people with GHSV1 outbreaks frequently and some who get 1 every few years. Do your best to be your healthiest and definitely speak to a health professional about what youre experiencing

@mr_hopp @Notgoingthere thank you! Ya I feel like Ive definitely had this before, just now that I've been diagnosed I've been panicking about little things. Also, yesterday I masturbated and showered and then noticed 3 little "freckles" at the tip of my penis. I have definitely not had them forever. Is this an outbreak? They're little brown dots, they don't hurt at all and they're not raised. I definitely had no sensation or tingling on my penis before and they also didn't show up as sores or anything. They literally look like freckles. Any explanation for this?

I know Im most likely being paranoid but I gotta ask... I was diagnosed with GHSV1 in August. I had my initial very mild OB which went within a few days and have not had any OBs/symptoms since. Today I felt a little bump inside my left nostril. When I touch it, it hurts. Classic Im freaking out. Can you get herpes INSIDE your nose? If so, is that what its like? It just feels like one bump inside on the wall of my nostril and it hurts when I put pressure on it. @mr_hopp

I am a male with GHSV1 too, but I hear that for women your period is really triggering for it to OB. Maybe speak to your doctor about upping your dosage around your time of month! Sorry you're going through this 😞

Got a rimjob from a guy I was dating and then felt 3 little bumps a few days later in the shower. Got it swabbed the next day and was positive for HSV1. Live and learn. Today I was with my cousins and my cousins having a pretty bad oral outbreak. Just reminds me I have the same thing in another area and thats okay 🙂

Hey @Strength123 I was diagnosed about a month ago and if you read my first post from then...I’m at a very different place already. I mean, it comes in waves/rollercoasters of emotions and I have some times when I get down about it but then I always revert to the facts. This is a lot more common than we think. Especially given the prevalence of casual sex these days, so many being unaware of having it, etc. I’d say the number are even greater than the stats published. We just have the burden of knowledge. And that’s the problem. Most people who have it don’t know they do and because of that, they don’t get to feel the way we do. But they’re still living their lives because they don’t know and it doesn’t change you! Just because you do know doesn’t change you. You’re still the same person with a good career and a warm home. It really is just an inconvenience - a skin inflamation which comes and goes every so often. i haven’t had to disclose yet but from reading others’ stories on here, humanity is a lot more understanding than we think. At the end of the day, HSV1 and 2 affect BILLIONS of people around the world. We’re not the minority. People know that. You will find the right person with time! I know I plan on it.

I hear you. Before I got tested, I thought I should just ignore it and play ignorant even though I too had self diagnosed myself and was sure of what it was. However, Im happy I found out because then I researched more about HSV1 particularly and having it in the genital area and now Im informed and know how to deal with it! Makes it easier.

Firstly, you can have HSV1 or HSV2 on your genitals! More and more diagnosis’ of GHSV are GHSV1 being transmitted through oral sex. The next time you have an OB, try to get it swabbed ASAP so they can determine the strain. It’ll help you with choosing what to do go forwarding in terms of managing it. I have GHSV1. Secondly, the area where you are first infected is where the virus will stay. So if you have HSV1 or HSV2 on your genitals, oral sex is SAFE (for you to perform on another person, having someone perform it on you is another story because you have the virus down there). However, If you do have GHSV2, you could have HSV1 orally as well which would put your partner at risk. Maybe get a blood test to see where your antibodies are at.

I was diagnosed with GHSV1 after I had an outbreak around my anus. I've been doing laser hair removal on my butt/anus for over a year now...can I continue to go? Or will the laser trigger an outbreak?

@chk22 I was just diagnosed with GHSV1 and I had nerve tingling too. Just more so felt like aches particularly in my left leg, a little bit in my foot and bit in my groin. I didn't experience that level of fatigue though but I've heard thats normal!

Okay I think I have a few answers. If your partner ever gets cold sores then you wont be able to pass it to him orally because you cant re-infect him with a virus he already has (80% of the GLOBAL population has HSV1 so this is promising)..."For a person who has had herpes cold sores from herpes simplex virus 1 (HSV1), it is unlikely for HSV1 to be transmitted to the genitals through oral sex. Having been infected with HSV1, the immune system has already manufactured, and kept on reserve, antibodies to this virus. Thus, when the virus is encountered again, the immune system is already well acquainted with its enemy and can initiate a quick and efficient counterattack. On the other hand, for someone who has never had herpes cold sores before, infection with HSV1 through oral sex can result in a true primary episode of genital herpes. By some estimates, 50 to 90 percent of the American adult population carry antibodies to HSV1" I cant find some of the other stats I've read again now but I know that GHSV1 sheds a lot less then GHSV2 and it is very rare to transfer it genital to genital because HSV1 doesn't like the genitals. Thats why they GHSV1 has (statistically, though it depends the person) less OBs and sometimes doesn't even breakout again after your primary OB. So its more difficult to transfer genital to genital but still possible. I cant find the exact percentages.

@Ishmael absolutely. That is something I didn't think about! Thanks!

@Ishmael I think they should too! Just think its unjust that on top of being made to feel less than for having HSV genitally rather than orally, we are also told we must have these compromising disclosure conversations when people who get it orally are not held to the same standard

In the same boat as you and looking for the same answers!

So now that I've officially been diagnosed with GHSV1, I've been doing a lot more research on that specific strain/location of the virus. While I'm still shaken up by my less-than-24-hours-ago diagnosis, I am learning a lot more about it and that is helping me deal with the situation. The lady who gave me my diagnosis said that because it was GHSV1, my recurrences will likely be 1-2 a year IF it even ever decided to come back, due to HSV1 not really liking the genital region (*side note: please correct anything I'm saying if it is wrong! I'm repeating things I've been seeing/reading online and am very new here so I may not have all the facts/am accurate! 🙂 ) My entire family actually has HSV1 so I guess I was bound to get it someday. However, the rest of them have it orally. The only people who know about my diagnosis are my mom and my sister (again, who both get it orally). Both of their reactions were "so what? who cares", which was comforting to hear, at least. I resonated with what they were saying, that it really wasn't a big deal and the issue more so stems from a psychological stand point and how others (if they were to find out) are so quick to judge without knowing the facts. While no one really pokes fun at people getting cold sores (although my sister said in high school people did make fun of her but I think it was more so in a teasing way because cold sores really aren't seen as so "shameful" while genital herpes is), herpes down there is made out to be a lot worse. In relation to HSV1 (I know both HSV1 and HSV2 obviously share a lot of the same makeup, but depending on where they are located/how they are transmitted there are differences in how the behave? Correct me if I'm wrong please!), me and my whole family have literally the exact same virus. Technically, genital herpes means we all get "cold sores" in a more discrete area of our body. When you say it like that, its not as scary. For some reason, the term "genital herpes" sounds a lot more like a cartoon villain moreover than "cold sores" does (I think just from media, the stigma created back in the day, how its perceived, etc.) What I explained to my mom and sister was that what will most effect me in this diagnosis is having to disclose to people that I once had a very mild outbreak. They both laughed at me and said they've never once in their life told me before kissing somebody/being intimate that they have cold sores every so often and that that isn't something I need to disclose. I'm a very ethical and moral and honest person so I told them that it wasn't up for debate, I had to say something in advance. And then I started thinking... (for arguments sake! Like I said, I will always disclose because I think thats the right thing to do but lets just have a little debate with some facts for a second) 1) My sister and mom never felt the need to tell anyone they dated that they got a cold sore every few months because it seems like thats not something people would tell you to disclose since it isn't made out to be such a big deal. They aren't telling me to be dishonest when they tell me they think its absurd that I feel the need to tell someone that, they just were never told they should when simply put, I have exactly what they do. Maybe its because when people find out they have a cold sore, no one freaks out. They don't even go get tested for it. They just know it's a cold sore, take something over the counter or Valtrex (which my sister uses) and thats that. So then why do we who have it genitally (and Im referring to HSV1 specifically) feel the need to do so? If having HSV1 on your genitals is essentially having "the oral cold sore virus" down there, why should we? Isn't that just furthering the stigma? If you have it on your mouth, its no big deal. Just dont kiss someone (obviously) when you have an outbreak or feel one coming. But if we have it on our genitals (or have had it, potentially even just one time 6 years ago - not my situation but I'm saying for others and for arguments sake), God forbid we don't say something. Shouldn't it just be dont have sex (obviously) when you have an outbreak or feel one coming? Someone could say well what about asymptomatic shedding... 2) Lets look at some of the facts (if they're not correct, please let me know!!!): one article I read said "[the risk of shedding when there is no outbreak for] genital hsv1...is very small because genital hsv1 doesn't shed very often at all. It sheds far less often than genital hsv2, and considerably less often than oral hsv1". In that case, shouldn't there be more of an obligation to those who carry it orally to disclose that information? "They are contageous around 18% of the time from their mouth area, whether they are having a cold sore or not. Those with a genital type 1 infection are only contageous 0-5% of the time from their genital area, so they are very rarely the source of the infection. The way GHSV1 is almost always transmitted is just oral-->genital, during oral sex, by a person who gets cold sores." Technically, have HSV1 on your genitals is like a "good" combination: because HSV1 doesn't thrive in that part of your body, it may lay dormant after an initial outbreak. And if it does emerge sometimes, it has lower rates of shedding and therefor transmission given you take the other necessary precautions (condoms, meds, etc.) (also, this is a summary from what I understand so fill in the blanks if there are any!) 3) Say before coming to disclosure, your partner casually mentions that sometimes they get cold sores...If he already has antibodies and is immune to HSV1, wouldn't that make the fact that you have or sometimes get an outbreak below the wait? You cant give someone a virus they already have."GHSV1 has a 3-5% transmission rate which can be lowered by condoms and suppressive therapy. Oral HSV1 has a 9-18% rate" so why are those who have it genitally and less likely to transmit under more pressure to be so up front when those who have it orally are more likely to spread it via oral sex? If I were to start dating someone and after 6 months they got a cold sore, I (this is me personally so tell me how you feel) would not panic or feel betrayed by it. Because sores (in any form, on any body part) should not be a huge ordeal. Like so many say on here, herpes becomes something that is just a non-issue and more so an annoyance/nuissance. Thats how someone who doesn't disclose they get cold sores on their lips must feel, and I wouldn't think anything of it. But if I had an outbreak on my anus 6 months into a relationship and my partner asked why we couldn't get intimate and I said "oh Im having a cold sore on my butt, should clear up in a few days" I would get scorned. I would be looked down upon for being "dishonest" and not disclosing that information and not giving my partner an option, etc. when in reality, if I were HSV negative and my partner got cold sores, no one would say that of them. No one would look at them as "putting me at great risk" when actually at the end of the day (and exactly how I was given this) was from someone who had a non-stigmatized, non-issue-according-to-society, cold sore. And according to science/data, their oral HSV1 is what is increasingly putting people at risk of getting GHSV1. This is not an attack on those who have it orally! Haha. I know it may come off that way. I'm just trying to understand why there is such a great divide and why those who have it genitally are under more pressure to be so upfront just because of its location (in relation to HSV1, which again is "no better" than HSV2 but I have just been using the facts linked to GHSV1 for this debate). Let me know your thoughts.