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Orngpeelmafia

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Everything posted by Orngpeelmafia

  1. I've been taking it for two years and it hasn't stopped my enjoyment of an adult beverage that I enjoy quite often (yolo). Hope is right check with your doctor but if I remember my doctor also gave me the green light.
  2. I did find this on Facebook...the comments made me want to throw up. "That's herpes, shingles is different, herpes you get from having sex his mother should've taught him better." WHAT THE ACTUAL F*CK. No knowledge all ignorant bullshit spewed into the world from people too lazy to care. This needs to change. I know everyday this site grows as does the community within it and with each gained member there's another person making a change but things like this make me feel like all the progress I've made has been for naught. It won't stop me nor does it hinder me...but what about the people who haven't found their acceptance? What about the kid? What about his girlfriend or friends who are now terrified for what herpes could be. What about his teammates?!?! I am furious for them.
  3. So you're going through the healing process :) and it's good to read you have a spark in you to fight your way out of the hole you've found yourself in. DONT GIVE UP! I promise it gets better if you keep fighting. I've had relationships with H+ and H- people after I found out. I thought I would end up with a dating pool of zero people and now I am one of the people you speak of looking at this as a positive! I find myself being more selective now not out of fear of rejection but really looking at people to see if they're worth my time :) I found a lot of love for myself through this journey and I think you will too. Don't give up. But allow yourself to be mad or sad or whatever you are feeling because you need to...just don't stay there! <3 it gets better
  4. Okay I had a few moments to stop shaking with rage. Maybe I can add a little depth to this post. Sorry for my long stint off the boards I've been away from the web and out in the world. Herpes is such a small part of my life now I have days where I don't even think about it. The people close to me in my life know and so does every person I consider being intimate with and through numerous disclosures I haven't been rejected...I thank all of you for that by the way for all of you have offered strength and knowledge for me to take a long journey and accept myself. This is why I'm so angry!!! This once HUGE life shattering moment in my life has now been reduced to next to nothing. I'm strong and confident and I refused to let a rash beat me and I won. Person by person I am changing the world around me...each disclosure I have doesn't always end in sex (I have learned to say no to temptation! Even in the face of eager acceptance) it has ended in a win because I have an educated talk with someone and they look at a part of the world in a new light. I started having hope that soon I would see changes due to the ripples I have been making. THEN THIS TRASH POPS UP. How dare not only a news channel but a FAMILY do this to a human being?!?! This isn't news! Okay I'm angry again and I'm gonna stop before I start throwing around profanities and saying things I haven't had time to fully process. Ugh.
  5. Thanks Fox News. REALLY. I need your input guys...right now I'm so disgusted with the media. This kind of shaming and ignorant (excuse my language) bullshit needs to stop. http://www.myfoxphilly.com/story/26310922/viral-disease I can't believe this is A)considered news and B) handled so poorly.
  6. So I know totally how you feel...how I overcame that was realizing that I was still holding onto that stigma. I knew all the stats and had come a looooong way in terms of acceptance but I was still in that "I'm a walking contagion" mind frame. Even as it lessened and I was able to function out in the world like a normal human being the thought of being physically intimate was downright SCARY. It's hard to think of being close to someone and not think "omg what if this is the one day I'm asymptomatically shedding" or some crazy thing like that...that's how my brain worked at least. At the end of the day if you are knowledgable and open and honest with your partner and do everything in your power to keep them informed and they still think you're worth it then relax because anything that happens from that moment on is out of your control. Now, that being said, it seems like there are other things at play here that may be causing your feelings of unease when it comes to sex. Herpes may be the lead role in that show but emotional abuse takes a big toll on ones self image and can do a lot of damage in the self respect and self love departments. Again I speak only from my experiences but I have also been in situations where verbal abuse ran rampant and after hearing the million ways I wasn't good enough I started to believe it and once I was out of that relationship I couldn't feel sexy because I couldn't love myself. Just recently after a breakup I found myself slipping back into that very dark realm and the best advice I have for you is work on loving you. Do things that make you feel good and smile. Do things that take your mind away from the negative and make you feel accomplished even if it's just taking a walk around the block. The more you work on loving you the more you'll find love for yourself and the more love you have for yourself the more beautiful you will become to yourself :) after that it's sexy land again!
  7. Everyone deals with herpes a little differently...I've been on suppressives for almost two years now (with a couple months off while I was single here and there just to see how my body reacted) just because if I happen to be put in a situation where I feel comfortable disclosing I want to already be on medication....so it's really up to you and what you will feel will be good for not only your body but tor peace of mind...I know the first year suppressives helped so much with me not overreacting to every little itch or ingrown hair. It's a lot to take in...but once you shed that stigma life gets pretty normal. You're letting a stigma born out of misinformation become a catalyst for your negativity and self doubt...YOU ARE NOT A VIRUS! And your boyfriend is probably just as upset as you are going through all the same feelings :( take a deep breath....it's gonna be okay. Start reading the success stories on here...going through and reading dancers posts will help a lot she's an amazing woman full of strength, wisdom, and a hell of a lot of knowledge and she tells it like it is. Everyone who has just been diagnosed will tell you their world is shattered...everyone that's had this for a while and started their journey of self acceptance will tell you that when they picked up the pieces, the picture they started to make was even more beautiful than the one they saw before :) make sense?
  8. @dancer if you could let me know the name of that program...I feel this is something I need to see...for science ;) and then to figure out how I can do that hahahaha @inspired I do really like the idea of becoming close with someone on another level and @dancer is right tantric sex is pretty intense...trust and open communication is very much an important factor in a healthy relationship and if you two have found a way to strengthen that bond that's amazing :)
  9. The closest I got was having my one dr at planned parenthood write down the name to this forum because she said she'd pass it on to other patients...but that's it :( I wish that along with the cdc pamphlet people could get the address to this site...
  10. Well my whole confusion is this: I'm all for expanding sexuality but this just sounds like regular forplay to me...but with gloves. So I did a little googling and HOLY CRAP ITS EXPENSIVE. I like the idea of separating an orgasm from climax though. Have you ever thought about exploring sexuality and climax through other parts of the body? It's quite amazing how much of our bodies we take for granted. :) just a little food for thought!
  11. Epsom salt bath followed by a blow dryer on "cool" setting instead of toweling off...trust me ;) that was the most comforting moment during my first OB and it helped dry everything out a bit so it didn't sting so bad! Also you're not dirty. Knock that off. :) I say that kindly!!!!! You are not dirty or any of the negative things going through your head. Everything's gonna be alright :)
  12. Well hi and welcome! You have come to the right place for good facts and support :) So do you have HSV-1 or HSV-2? Did you find out by having an outbreak and then being tested or did you just request a blood test at your last STD testing? Are you aware that the majority of the population has HSV-1 orally and a blood test won't tell you WHERE you have HSV just that you HAVE it? Did the person you had sex with know they were HSV positive? Were they on suppressive therapy to reduce transmission rates? Did you know condoms aren't a 100% guarentee against any std (or even pregnancy for that matter)? Did you know that most OBs don't look like the google images and most cases go undiagnosed because people brush off their symptoms as heat rash/razor burn/an ingrown hair? My point is there are a LOT of factors that go into transmission and being safe. Most people think this is highly contagious because they acquired it from someone who unknowingly had it and passed it on...most people don't think "oh I have a cold sore on my lip and that's herpes I won't go down on my partner until that clears up" and that's why HSV-1 is the cause for about 50% of all new genital cases (hi there! I got HSV-1 on my nether bits!) also HSV is not a part of regular std testing you have to request specifically to get blood tested. Doctors don't spend time learning about HSV because medically speaking it's no big deal. This is not life threatening so they know symptoms and that's about it. The emotional damage cause by an ignorant stigma isn't taken into consideration. Speaking from two years of being an HSV vet under my belt I can tell you the doctors are right when they tell you it's no big deal :) I know how you feel...when I was first diagnosed I felt like a walking contagion and was scared to touch anyone. I felt like if I looked at someone wrong they'd get herpes hahaha. Herpes is passed from direct skin to skin contact so while condoms can lower the transmission rate by about half (because you're covering a larger area of skin that's involved in sex) that doesn't guarentee a 100% safe pass through sex. I abstain if I'm with an H- person and I have even the tiniest itch or even razor burn just to be safe. It's hard to say no sometimes but I have a clean track record with transmission (as far as I know) because I abstain when I feel any symptoms, use antivirals to cut transmission rates in half, and also use condoms to lower that rate again by half. It's also easier for women to contract HSV than men because of our biological structure...we've got an easier access point for HSV with the way our lady bits are designed the skin lets in the virus waaaaay easier than guys. I hope that helped a bit and there will be some other people commenting soon who will offer the same stats and such...I know it's hard to believe life will ever be the same again but I promise it gets waaaaaaaay better :)
  13. @dancer you bring up an interesting point with yeast...ever do research into the candida diet? I had someone go through the cleanse it's crazy.
  14. @blueeyes it was a very amazing learning experience to say the least. This was before I found this place and was relying on the positive singles forum to try and reach out to anyone to just talk about what I was going through. He was an old high school crush I ran into at a local bar one night and we hit it off. Took about two months of making out and partying and having fun together before he started to pull away. I remember if I spent the night I would sleep in my jeans hahaha I was so afraid that if I didn't and then disclosed and he freaked out that he'd say something like "oh my god you slept next to me did I get it too?!?!" Crazy I know lol I tried so many times to say it to him and just couldn't. I spent hours upon hours rehearsing my disclosure in the mirror and countless times just ended up bawling my eyes out I was so scared of rejection. so one night were out grabbing drinks and he looks at me and says "you know I'm not going to claim to know why you're being so weird but I have a really good hunch and if you open up a little you may find you're not as alone as you think" so I took a deep breath and let it all out and came to find out I wasn't as alone as I thought. Turns out he was a bit of a jerk in the romance department but the time we did spend together was wonderful...and I will forever be grateful to him for showing me it's not that big of a deal. He had been living with h for a bit and had come to terms with it and just didn't care. He also showed me the other side of "herpes doesn't make a person" because even though he has h and we connected on that level and I felt I finally had someone who understood...I wanted a relationship and he didn't and things got a little messy. I built up this image of him in my head that wasn't entirely true and a big part of it was because I had found "someone like me" when in reality were all just people :) TL;DR dating is tough :D
  15. I remember having a moment like this...and when I finally disclosed it turned out he had herpes too hahahahaha
  16. "Can't shake the thought of what guy is going to take the time to get to know a girl without sex let alone a girl with herpes." Ok so lemme kick that thought out of your noggin right now :) You. Are. AMAZING. And herpes isn't going to change that. Nothing will if you don't give it the power to. I had a hard time believing it for a while...but what I didn't realize is I was using herpes as an out...it was easier just to blame herpes and throw in the towel. Well lemme tell you I'm glad I changed my mind and started going out again. It was scary but it was also very eye opening. People don't care as soon as they hear the facts IF you're honest and courageous...and anyone who finds it to be a deal breaker probably wasn't worth it. It sucks sure but it really isn't any different than a guy saying "ew you have tattoos that's really not attractive" or something. It hurts to hear but in the end it's their loss not mine :)
  17. You haven't cut down a tree with a dull ax and your bare hands. MAN CARD REVOKED! Jkjkjkjk Herry I love you :)
  18. Herpes can't do that. You're confusing HSV with HPV. HSV is herpes (herpes simples virus) HPV is a type of std that can cause genital warts and some strains may cause cancer (human papilloma virus) HPV is extremely common and most strains of the virus don't actually do anything and the body fights off infection but certain strains can cause problems with the cervix, genital warts, and in certain cases cancer. This is part of why we get PAP smears...they're not truely defining but they help as a warning system if you have an unusual pap more in depth HPV testing will be done. It's also my experience that the more you overthink every little bump the more you'll stress and actually bring on an OB that wasn't there to begin with. The mind is a powerful thing and while it's good to keep track of what's going on with your body keep in mind that not everything is herpes :) your body is finding a new version of "normal" so there's going to be some prodrome and such for a bit but I envisioned it as my antibodies and the herpes having an epic medieval style battle in my body hahaha weird I know but it worked to help calm me down and deal with....it made me giggle and laughing helped calm me down and staying calm helps keep the herp derps away
  19. What dosage were you prescribed? Could be that you just need to up the dosage a bit... Hormones are a pain in the rear end they can put your body through all types of stress. My gyn recommended I go on the pill to help prevent OBs...without a spike in hormones my body isn't stressed out and I don't go through as many OBs
  20. @rainy if you just go to the planned parenthood website you can find one near you :) and even though you'll check the little box that says "herpes testing" make sure you ask your doctor again...my diagnosis was visual no swab or anything even at planned parenthood (though I will say if there's any gyn that knows herpes by sight it would be a doc that sees it on the daily) I eventually went back and asked for the type test. Year and a half later and I'm finally typed :)
  21. Herry and dancer said it at. And I have to agree with dance...sounds a little crazy to be upset at losing a thing you don't want doesn't it? And the crazier thing still is YOU CAN STILL HAVE IT :) true story been there done that realized even though I still could I didn't want to. You're allowing this virus to control you...and it seems like there's no other choice...but there is everyone here with a little bit of time under their belt will tell you the same :) with time and some hard work on loving you life returns to normal! For me I need time to realize my body wasn't going to spontaneously combust in bumps hahaha the more the days passed and my body didn't change the more I realized it was all in my head and that's where the real work came in (still under construction but hey it's gettin there!) and my life is pretty normal nowadays....well MY version of normal ;) Take a look at your day and see what's changed from your normal routine...and if nothing's changed that should say it all. If you realize you're not going out to your favorite place to eat or you're not hiking or walking or running anymore GO :) life doesn't have to change for the worst my friend
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