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Confusedanddepressed

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Confusedanddepressed last won the day on July 13

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  1. Hi everyone! I wanted to update with a disclosure story and maybe it’ll help someone who’ll see this one day too! I recently found out my status and it crushed me. The first night I told my boyfriend he was shocked as well but super supportive. He held me while I cried and reassured that he still wanted this relationship and a future with me. He promptly got tested and we are awaiting his results. I told him there was a chance I could have had this a while and he could totally not have it while telling him all about suppression therapy and statistics. He doesn’t care either way. He doesn’t see me any differently. And told me that even if he doesn’t have it, that’s not something he’s too worried about because I was worth any risk. I think I may love him more now than I did before. He’s my best friend but I know the stigma and fear associated with this. Gratefully, if this is my first true OB it was super mild and I only thought I had BV (which I do have that too apparently??) but he has held my hand through it all and I’m determined not to let this define me. Hopeful for the future and that I’ll have the same courage to tell my best friend one day too. I also wanna change my name from confused and depressed because only positive affirmations belong in my life! (I’m not sure how yet though lol?)
  2. I am totally trying this!! Thank you so much! You rock 🙂
  3. Hi everyone! I’m a 24yr old AA female living in North Carolina. I was just diagnosed yesterday and am still in shock. I cried all day afraid of the life I’ll have to live with now. I didn’t have the “typical” first outbreak. In fact, it was so mild I didn’t realize anything too serious was going on. I’m not sure how long I’ve had this but I have to disclose to my boyfriend soon and I’m afraid of rejection. There’s so much stigma around this and I guess that’s fueling my fear. Any advice??
  4. Thank you so much for this! I got up the courage to disclose and it went better than expected! He was understanding & reassuring. I don’t feel as gross and I’m hopeful it’ll get better!
  5. I’m not sure if anyone will read this but I hope so. I just found out today that I have genital herpes. I’m not sure yet exactly which strand it is. I have a boyfriend. He just recently asked me to be his girlfriend and I love him a lot, we’ve been seeing eachother for quite a while. He’s a really great guy. And I’m afraid to tell him. I guess I just don’t know how. And I feel so full of shame and embarrassed. I haven’t told anyone. I feel really alone. I’m too embarrassed to talk to anyone about it. I don’t know how long I’ve had it. I didn’t have some painful experience (thankfully) like others do. So I didn’t know. I figured it was a simple vaginal infection. Anyone have any advice on anything dealing with this virus? The doctor didn’t really talk to me about it. I just feel so low.
  6. Hi all, feel free to read my previous posts to provide insight I would definitely appreciate it! Adding on from my previous posts, I went to the doctor and was told I had BV and provided with some type of powder to drink to rid of it (I’m in another country and I’m only used to pills) . That was 10/15. Fast forward to now, I’ve noticed that every time I drink alcohol now, my genitals/anus gets super dry & itchy. I had a glass of wine on Thursday and now my butthole (sorry tmi) started to feel dried out. I wiped after using the bathroom today and saw blood specs. I’m not sure if it’s because it is so dry or what? And why would I get itchy or dry after drinking alcohol? Could it be a yeast issue still? Before I was given yeast infection medicine last month I wasn’t experiencing an itch but after I took it it seemed to irritate me down below. I won’t be able to get tested until I return to the states in two weeks but I’m literally so worried about what could be going on 😞 help.
  7. Hi all, Is constant calf, knee, butt, and eye twitching herpes related? I’m constantly having these issues that everyone is contributing to me stressing about possibly having herpes and not actual herpes? Feel free to read my previous posts and weigh in on your thoughts! Anything helps until I can get tested 😕 I am a bit stressed. This twitching has gone on for about a month as well.
  8. I went to the doctor to try to get these dry white patches on my Genital area checked for herpes. They appear on my underwear line, inner thigh, and pubic area. They itch sometimes but not often, usually when I wash down there it gets irritated. I assumed it was herpes because I had spent so much time googling symptoms (probably not the best thing but I was nervous). Anyway, the gynecologist took one look and goes “this isn’t herpes?” . So I asked if she thought she needed to swab the area and she replied no and told me there wasn’t anything for her to swab. Does that sound correct? Or should I trust the gyno about my symptoms and chalk it up to something else?
  9. So I wrote prior about this issue but wanted to give an update... bare with me I’m sorry it’s so long! Okay so here is what’s going on. So the last time I had sex was 8/13 and it was protected sex. Around 8/23 I started noticing a strong odor coming from my vagina. Kinda how it smelled whenever I would have Bacteria Vaginosis. Then shortly after I got really itchy in my Genital and inner thigh & butt area. But the itchiness would be off and on. Some days I would itch and others I wouldn’t at all. Also if it were really hurt sometimes I would get irritant with itching. The odor began to smell really fishy like as well. I also had a scab on my labia that I would scratch. So fast forward to 9/13 I had random unexplained shooting pain in my vagina area any time I would get up after sitting for awhile. That too, went away after the day. I then noticed the scab area on my labia was now a red bump that hurt. I think it went away after a week. I then started getting a discomfort in my lower abdomen area and on 9/24 it hurt if I walked really fast or too much. It went away or it would kinda come and go occasionally. I discovered in this time one of my eyes got red and I got a tingly feeling on my lip and a little bump came that didn’t hurt at all after I scratched my lip when it itched. It too went away after a day or so (the eye). The lip bump was just kinda a scab. I opted to go to the hospital 10/1 to see what was going on. My abdomen hurt when the doctor pressed down on it during a pelvic exam. It also kinda hurt when she entered me a bit. She treated me for a yeast infection but said an infection was also found in my urine. So anyway, I took the meds but when I got home I decided to examine my genital area and I see what looks like a rash on the corner crevices of my vagina where the pubic area is. And there are whitish rashy scaby type areas near the entrance on my inner thighs. I hadn’t noticed it before. I immediately chalked it up to herpes (I’m a bit of a worry wart as well) I decided to once again go back to the hospital to be seen. I went and showed the problem area to the gynecologist and she told me it wasn’t herpes at all. She looked at the areas closely and seems to think I just have a skin issue and not the virus. So again, I left. I have been a bit itchy down there lately but I also haven’t shaved/waxed in a while because I’m too afraid to so that may be adding to the problem? I have been having some discomfort when I walk due to the rubbing of my genitals on my jeans. I again examined myself to find a red line that appeared to be kinda raw, no blisters or anything though? should I take both of the doctors words or does this seem like herpes? I’m just worried because I’m a student studying abroad in France and I’m super scared and confused. Please offer any guidance or advice of what this could be? If it is an outbreak...would it last this long?
  10. Okay so here is what’s going on. So the last time I had sex was 8/13 and it was protected sex. Around 8/23 I started noticing a strong odor coming from my vagina. Kinda how it smelled whenever I would have Bacteria Vaginosis. Then shortly after I got really itchy in my Genital and inner thigh & butt area. But the itchiness would be off and on. Some days I would itch and others I wouldn’t at all. Also if it were really hurt sometimes I would get irritant with itching. The odor began to smell really fishy like as well. I also had a scab on my labia that I would scratch. So fast forward to 9/13 I had random unexplained shooting pain in my vagina area any time I would get up after sitting for awhile. That too, went away after the day. I then noticed the scab area on my labia was now a red bump that hurt. I think it went away after a week. I then started getting a discomfort in my lower abdomen area and on 9/24 it hurt if I walked really fast or too much. It went away or it would kinda come and go occasionally. I discovered in this time one of my eyes got red and I got a tingly feeling on my lip and a little bump came that didn’t hurt at all after I scratched my lip when it itched. It too went away after a day or so (the eye). The lip bump was just kinda a scab. I opted to go to the hospital 10/1 to see what was going on. My abdomen hurt when the doctor pressed down on it during a pelvic exam. It also kinda hurt when she entered me a bit. She treated me for a yeast infection but said an infection was also found in my urine. I’m just scared because I’m in France studying abroad and won’t be home until December. Please help, I’m severely depressed.
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