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nobody555

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nobody555 last won the day on February 24

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  1. Hey there, So I was totally on your boat for a good 6 months. I eventually had to call my doctor and it wasn't until she put me on 1 G or 1000 mG of valtrex that my OB stopped. The second I would stop taking it, my OB would start again. This lasted for about a year unfortunately. Its been over a year for me now and I hardly ever get an OB and I am not constantly on medication. I only take medication when I have an OB which has only been once since my year mark. It gets better I promise! Always here to chat if you need someone to talk to!
  2. It may seem that way, and I felt like that too at first but eventually I started realizing so many people around me had it. Roommates, family members, boyfriends. Most commonly it was cold sores but I was very surprised some had HSV2 too. Its so common its insane so dont feel alone! Most people just dont talk about it because of our society.
  3. I have told 2 people; one being my mom and I found out SHE HAD IT TOO! it was nice being able to go through the hurt with someone else who knows how you feel. I had talked about it a lot with friends, not necessarily saying I had it but just some facts that I learned and how common it was, and friends have disclosed to me that they have it. Its very common and I feel unless you talk about it, the more in the dark you feel which is so not true! 🙂
  4. I had pretty severe symptoms for the first year. OB every week constantly and the tingling 24/7. I got put on valtrex 1000 mg which helped me a lot. Once a FULL year has hit you will notice your symptoms calm down. I am so sorry you are in so much pain. I am here if you need to talk. I promise life gets better and soon you wont even notice it.
  5. You are not alone and that is just not true. I know it feels that way but you did nothing to deserve this and someone will love you! I am here to talk. Check out any of my stories if you want some inspiration. I promise everything will be okay.
  6. I feel like theres nothing you can do to go back, but if you really care about him you should tell him because you did put him at risk. Some people don't ever have symptoms so if for some reason you guys broke up he could keep passing it along. Its the right thing to do and you know that but that doesn't mean it's not hard. I'm here for you!
  7. Not sure what the stats are but not all this information is correct. My brother and I were both vaginally delivered and my mother is HSV2 positive. Both of us were perfect and healthy. I got my little gift from my boyfriend when I was 23 not my brother from birth. So if you know and are careful having natural child birth is perfectly fine.
  8. I think I was pretty lucky after my diagnosis. I only dated one guy and disclosure was successful so I don't have much advice. But what I can say is I worked on myself drastically to forgive myself for having faults and flaws. I decided I was going to become who I always wanted to emotionally and physically. The gym helps me a lot. Once I met my boyfriend I dated him for a few months without sex to 1. make sure he was worthy of my vulnerability and secret and 2. To allow him to understand who I am without this bomb dropping info. A lot of people like to disclose right away to avoid getting attached but the way I see it is nobody asked us if we wanted this so why would someone else risk it unless they have a REAL GOOD answer. The answer is "because he/she is so amazing I don't care". I didn't disclose to my boyfriend until I KNEW I really cared about this man and my own shame and fear of rejection came second to protecting him. When I disclosed I simply stated this is what I found out. These are some facts. And this is what you now need to decide. Do you have any more questions? Then he asked many things. My boyfriend cared deeply about me but his main concern was having a family which I knew so I learned facts ahead of time about all of that. I believe it knowing your audience is key. Bottom line is you should not feel horrible about yourself. You are amazing. Use confidence to lay it out on the line. Nobody is perfect. We all have baggage. You did nothing different than anyone else on this planet, we just happened to get unlucky.
  9. Im so sorry this has happened to you but welcome. This is a good place to get information and there's so many of us on here if you need someone to talk to. Yes you can still spread the virus without visible sores! It's called viral shedding. People don't think they can give the virus when they don't have sores and this is probably how more than half of us on this site now have this gift that keeps giving. The transmission rate depends if you are a a female sleeping with non-infected or vice versa. But being a female, Ive researched it was 1% being on antivirals and using condoms while not having an OB; female with non infected male. It goes to 2% if on antivirals but not using condoms. I believe its a little higher male to female like 3 or 4% but I'm not exactly sure what the numbers are. Hope this helps!
  10. I had constant OB for 3 months until my doctor switched me to 1 gram of valtrex and that helped immensely. I know how you feel but I promise it will get better. Nothing is ruined that is just the stigma talking. You are so much more than this skin condition. Message me if you need someone to talk to ❤️
  11. So weird I am here a year later. I remember going on this website trying to find a glimmer of hope to get me through the terrible news. I never in a million years thought I would be where I am today. A year ago I was devastated and heart broken, thought my love life and future were over. Let me tell you, this was the furthest from the truth. I was in a low place a year ago. I basically gave up dating and focused solely on my career. I worked out everyday and took care of myself as best as I could. This time allowed me to understand myself and forgive myself. All of sudden, I met the love of my life at the gym haha! I thought he wouldn't accept me but I am allowed to have fun and make friends. Turns out he really liked me and I geared up to tell him my little secret. (disclosure post is on here as well if you want to look that up) Anyways flash forward 8 months, he is everything I have ever wanted in a man. He treats me like a beautiful queen. Something I have looked for pre herpes but never found. Now I have a man who loves every part of me and accepts even my flaws. I use to think all the time how much I hated myself for having this gift that keeps giving. But I am so much stronger now. Nothing even comes close to trying to overcome the stigma and becoming so vulnerable to open yourself up to rejection. I am a better person because of this and I would have never saw myself to be like this a year ago. It is possible to be happy and fall in love. I PROMISE! Herpes does not define you. Forgive and love yourself. The rest will come with time. Message me if you need someone to talk to. Always here to listen!
  12. My advice personally, that everyone differs on is when to tell him/her. I didn't tell my boyfriend until he really knew me. I believe if you only give them that information without them knowing anything about you, that's all they see and run. Our gift is a little bit of baggage, yes but on a first date you dont tell them about your crazy dysfunctional sided family or your family history of cancer. Just anything baggage like. I think my disclosure went well because he knew me and he saw me. He just accepted my baggage as bad with everything else that was good. I know dating for awhile before telling is hard because of "wasted time" but who's to say that guy even deserves your vulnerability. You dont know how worthy he is to truly get to know you unless you also get to know him. Just my advice, everyone is different 🙂
  13. I finally told my boyfriend my little secret. I was terrified. Heart pumping, facts ready, on the verge of crying. We had just watched an episode of dexter so I thought to myself, well it could be worse, I could be a serial killer right? I sent him a text earlier in the night that we needed to talk about something so he would keep asking me about it. Although I pushed it off, I couldn't avoid it. I sat him down and told him about my surprise blood test and what it meant. I told him how much I cared about him and wanted to protect him. I told him he had to not only get tested but also decide if being with me is right for him. He kind of chuckled, which I was offended at first because I was in tears but his response was nothing what I expected. He said "do you think thats going to stop me from being with you?" He told me that I was the most amazing person he's ever met and I made him a better person. While I couldn't stop crying from happiness and relief, he even cracked a joke saying "it was just another bump in the road on the way to the rest of our lives" which I thought was both clever and funny. Really helped me stop being in my head and made me realize how small this issue truly was. He asked a bunch of questions and just held me until I was okay. And guess what? He even had sex with me that night. He did not care. He saw me for me not this disease which I felt nobody would ever see again. He makes me feel like the most beautiful girl in the world and I am seriously on cloud 9 that a beautiful man, inside and out, can treat me with such respect and love even with this little skin condition. Trust me ladies, he is the most handsome man I've ever dated. And sweetest. He texted me this morning telling me that he doesn't know how I do it because he cares even more deeply about me now than before I disclosed. I feel so connected and close with him, something I probably wouldn't have ever experienced without herpes. Who would have guessed herpes gave me something truly positive besides my STD test. haha! I hope this helps anyone feeling down and unloveable because that is just not true. You are worthy of anything you desire; success, happiness, and yes even LOVE.
  14. I know exactly how you feel. I was diagnosed over a year ago and I was right where you were. I was also 23 but I had constant outbreaks. I dont think I went more than 3 days without a OB. I had to go on a super high dose of medication. Ive learned to live with this disease and I even found the love of my life! I actually just disclosed to him last night and it went better than I expected. It is possible to be happy again I promise you that. I read all these posts when I was first diagnosed and did not believe I would ever be accepted or even loved ever again, but thats just not true. You have done nothing wrong and you are worthy of any life you desire. Here if you need to message me personally (: Please remember you are not alone.
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