LoveYourselfFirst

I am a 21 year old college student. I found out when I was 20 I have HSV1 genital... I’ve only had one outbreak which was my first initial one in January and haven’t had another one since. Trust me, herpes does NOT define you or make you who you are today. You are still the same person you were before despite having that. & there are guys out here who aren’t jerks and are mature about it who won’t let something like herpes come in the way of love or them wanting to get to know you. I’ve read about people in marriages and long term relationships who is with a partner who has it and their partner still has not passed it to them. I’ve only been with one person since I found out I have it and we’ve had sex without a condom numerous times also with a condom and he still doesn’t have it. There are different ways that you can prevent from spreading it to your partner you just have to know your body when you feel an outbreak is coming and use protection if you and your partner decides to do so. I know you’re going through a hard time right now but it will be okay. We all, and I mean every single person in this support group feels and have felt the same way you are feeling now. You are not alone! You can message me anytime you need someone to talk to. I understand how you feel completely and things will get better. Just know that you are not alone and there is a man in this world who won’t let something like herpes come in between what you guys have together.

I just want to say thank you to everyone sharing their stories and all of the uplifting advice I’ve gotten on here. I recently disclosed my status to a guy I really like and see myself being with for a really long time and it went wayyyyyyy better than I thought it would. I want to share my story because I feel like it would help anyone who is thinking about how or when to tell their potential partner and lover. A little back story: I have HSV1. I’ve had it since February of this year and have only had 1 outbreak since finding out i have it. I got it from my lying/cheating ex boyfriend who didn’t tell me he had it. Back to me telling him: So we’ve been seeing each other for a few weeks now and I couldn’t be happier than ever. I felt things were starting to get more serious and we were starting to be more intimate wanting to do more than kiss but every time we would get closer to doing oral or having sex I’d stop and say we should wait a little longer before we do that. I just knew I had to tell him because no matter how long you wait or when you do it, it’s never going to be easy to tell them so I just said to myself, “You know what, if he truly loves me and wants to be with me, this wouldn’t come between us.” So I did it. I told him how I got it, how long I’ve had it & educated him on the info I have learned since finding out I have it. They will ask questions so make sure you educate yourself on it so whatever questions they ask you will be able to answer. And if they ask you a question you don’t know, say “I don’t know the answer to that question but I can look it up and educate myself on it and find the answer to it” after me telling him, I thought he’d never speak to me again but by the grace of God, he wasn’t upset and said to me, “why didn’t you tell me sooner? That doesn’t change the way i look at you. I understand and don’t judge you. You had no control on how you got it. I still want to be with you despite what you have. You're smart and are educated on it so i trust you” that brought me so much joy and made me so happy I just wanted to share my story with you. I know it will be SO HARD for you to come out and share your story but no matter if you wait to tell them the second, third, fourth date or week or month, there is never an easy way to say it so just say it. You never know how someone will respond or take it. There will be that one jerk/asshole who is immature and not educated on it but there is always that one guy who is so sweet and understanding and won’t let something like that come between what you guys have. Good luck to anyone who is thinking about telling their partner. I hope your disclosure is a success like mine was. Best of luck!