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Healingjourney

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Everything posted by Healingjourney

  1. @VhYolo I wish I could say I feel better. I’ve had zero relief for the three weeks since I found out and now it appears to be breaking on my hands after avid hand washing and hand sanitizer this Is another challenge I am unprepared for. I am at rock bottom and see no relief in sight.
  2. Are you in Bali? If I go to the doctor here and it’s positive, will they call the police?
  3. This is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to write. I’ve read a lot of your posts and I’m so inspired by all the strength I see. Right now all I feel is darkness and despair. I am all alone in Bali (traveling 3 months already and 2 more months to go) and feel my vagina changing tonight and expect the painful part to come any day. I am terrified, absolutely terrified. My friend said she would hardly walk or sit on a chair. How am I going to go through this alone in a foreign country with a 20kg back pack. I just want to hop a plane and go home tomorrow but my home life isn’t a comforting place either. I feel so alone and don’t know where to go or what to do. Yes I’ve been taking Valtrex and resting. I have support from friends on the phone but nothing makes me feel better. I will be honest I’ve contemplated suicide, I’m ashamed to say it, I know it’s ridiculous. I’m angry that the person who gave it to me knew he was in an active outbreak and I don’t have a time machine to go back. I feel like I’ve ruined my life with one bad decision. I’m sick, scared and alone, I don’t know what to do.
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