Hello all, this is my first time posting in one of these forums. I’ve been reading through and it’s given me a lot of hope but I’m still feeling pretty depressed and anxious about this. I am 22 years old and I was diagnosed a month before my 22nd birthday (happy birthday to me right). I honestly had never even really heard about herpes and growing up in a catholic household I never even had “the talk”. I’m also Asian American and I feel like it’s so taboo for me to have it I honestly feel so disappointed in myself and I keep replaying when I believe I got infected because I should’ve just known better. Getting my herpes diagnosis did help me come to some realizations though. Before herpes, I honestly was pretty reckless with my sexual health and I thought sex was validation. I’m not saying I am a slut I didn’t sleep with a lot of people but also so what?! I’m in my 20’s my last year of college I should be allowed to have fun, right? But here we are. I just feel like I can’t be care free when I’m going out now and it just sucks because now when I’m around all my friends I just can’t stop thinking about how I’m the only one who has this. I feel like if they found out they’d all judge me. I feel like I can’t even tell my family because they would disown me and cut me off. I don’t know I just feel like my life is over and reading through this forums I know it’s not but being young with this just sucks. I’m not even sure what strain I have but I’m scared that I might have passed it on to one of my closest guy friends. I thought I was being safe I am on suppressive meds and he only performed oral sex for maybe 10 seconds so I didn’t think it would be enough to transmit but a few days later he told me he was feeling different symptoms (sore throat, cough, had a high fever). He was diagnosed with chlamydia and I was too scared to tell him I had H (I know I should have told him before but we were so drunk and I know that that is not an excuse but I am still embarrassed). I don’t know what to do now, his symptoms went away but I’m just dreading the day that he might pass it on to someone and I just feel so guilty. Any advice?
I also have some general questions. I am not sure what strain I have but I read here that it’s very rare to get hsv2 in the mouth so do you think I have ghsv1? I think I might have had an outbreak a week before this happened but it only lasted a few days. Please any advice for the future or with my situation would be so helpful. And if there are any Asian Americans on here, how did you get through getting this diagnosis??