Carlos

i am thankful to have found The (h) Opp and its creator Mister Dale. i am thankful for my family who have housed me, embraced me, guided me through the past 3 years (a challenging 3 years). i am thankful for the 46th street clubhouse in NYC (they know who they are). i am thankful for my health: i have a solid, functioning brain, 4 limbs with all digits intact, lungs to breathe with, a heart to feel with, ETC. i am thankful for my bed!!!! i am thankful for all the work opps that have come my way (and the ones that will be approaching). i am thankful for allthe entries i've read here in the forum; you are all an inspiring bunch. i am thankful for my sobreity and my higher power. i am eternally grateful for my existence here on planet Earth (never a dull moment). much love! C

Dear Daisy... what the two posters recommended, I concur with 100%. There is no formula as to WHEN TO HAVE THE TALK. it all depends on the couple and when the person with herpes feels is the right moment. The great thing is that you have abstained from sex and chosen the path less traveled (getting to know each other). we live in the Hook-Up era. with that said, remember that this isn't just about you. He is in your life at this moment for a reason. has he spoken to you about his past sexual activity? Is he a condom man, or is he the bareback type... is he monogomous? is he bisexual? is he polyamorous? Sorry to dump all this on your plate, but you must remember: IF YOU CONTRACTED HSV FROM AN EX SO EASILY... WHAT ELSE IS THERE TO CONTRACT FROM ANOTHER GENTLEMAN CALLER? This is your health you're dealing with... NOT protecting some guy's feelings or appeasing him for the sake of validation. YOU ARE NUMERO UNO every single day of your beautiful life. I'd say have your desktop or laptop on and logged in to this site... if he has questions, you can bring him to the blog area and you both can read about the virus, etc. If he rejects you based on your status, I ain't gonna sugar coat it... it will suck for a couple of days. But you will come out knowing a few things about this Man you didn't know before: 1) He does not know the ABCs of STDs--this means he's chosen the bliss of ignorance. 2) He jumps ship at the sight of a pimple. You need a man who's a compasionate trooper. 3) He mislead you into thinking he was wholly attracted to you, i.e; he has been dishonest during courtship... which means he's another douche bag using romance to get into your panties. This is the beauty of disclosing to someone; herein lies the beauty of engaging intimately and showing vulnerability... if the guy fails, and fails badly... Baby, that is no Man. That's a fucking child. Lastly, I'm just gonna look on the bright, bright side of your situation and visualize him saying something like: "That's okay, baby, I can totally handle it. Herpes doesn't diminish how hot I think you are." Or... "Baby, me too. I also have herpes, I was just waiting for the right moment to tell you; you beat me to it, I owe you a romantic dinner." Best wishes. Much Love. CARLOS

HEAR WHAT OPRAH WINFREY HAD TO SAY ABOUT MEN : If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be. Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends". A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend. Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better. The only person you can control in a relationship is you. Avoid men who have a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently? Always have your own set of friends separate from his. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up. Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later. You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within. Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are. Even if he has has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less. Never let a man define who you are. Never borrow someone else's man. If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you. All men are NOT dogs. You should not be the one doing all the bending... Compromise is a two way street. You need time to heal between relationships. There is nothing cute about baggage... Deal with your issues before pursuing a newrelationship. You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you. A relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals. Look for someone complimentary...not supplementary. Dating is fun... Even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right. Make him miss you sometimes... When a man always knows where you are, and you're always readily available to him, he takes it for granted. Never move into his mother's house. Never co-sign for a man. Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others. Scared of being alone is what makes a lot of women stay in relationships that are abusive or hurtful: Dr. Phil says... You should know that: You're the best thing that could ever happen to anyone and if a man mistreats you, he'll miss out on a good thing. If he was attracted to you in the 1st place, just know that he's not the only one. They're all watching you, so you have a lot of choices. Make the right one. Ladies take care of your own hearts. (Oprah Winfrey) I'd like to add... for my faithfully straight men... the same rules apply to women! It is never a one-way street. Takes two to Salsa ;) Yours truly, CARLOS

why HE or SHE left you. Most of you know my history, but for those who are reading my funk for the first time... I am a veteran HSV2 man... on top of that, homosexual to a fault (I truly love Men). On top of that, Actor (I truly love my craft... I'll even do crappy theater just to keep creativity flowing). And on top of all THAT, I'm from Colombia... the land that invented Machismo, Tropicalismo, Magic Realism, and redefined the meaning of Anger. Luckily, I come from a deep pool of good genes and I'm kinda pleasant to look at. If you're asking, at this juncture, who is this clown and who invited him? ...well, all things will be revealed in a need to know basis. For now, what I want you to wrap your pretty little head around is this: HERPES IS NOT THE REASON WHY-- I was diagnosed in the Spring of 2002. In the past 11 years I have met a number of men and have gotten in bed with them. I wish I could say I disclosed to all partners in a timely fashion, with integrity and poise... I wish I could, but I'd be bullshitting you. I messed up at least 3 times, (disclosing after the deed). One drifted out of my life before I could gather up the courage. Two of them I disclosed to over the phone (I was too ashamed to do it personally). Two others I disclosed to via email. In other words... I beat around the bush a lot. Dancing around the fact that I needed to do the right thing not just for me, for HSV2 can be a conduit for HIV infection amongst men who have sex with men, but for the poor guy making his way down my pants. Good news is, as time went by I became comfortable with having Gential Herpes. I did a lot of forgiving... did not just forgive the guy who infected me (an Ex-BF) but my parents and any one else I was holding hostage in my mind. "Take thee to a nunnery," said Hamlet to Ophelia. So I hired a psychotherapist. 9 years on the couch helped but was not sufficient. My subconscious was too powerful for Dr. Saunders to tame. It took some tough love on behalf of the Universe to teach me how to act, how to BE. The richest source of luck we have is other people: relationships... all of them, especially the crazy ones that leave you like you just got hit by a bus. The beautiful, short-lived ones too. And the great ones that seem to go on forever, until it's time to say goodbye. I dated men who panicked, or accepted my (h) with coolness, or stayed to try to work it out. I also met guys who upon my disclosure said with an enthusiastic yelp: "Me Too!" But after all was tallied-up, I'd be left thinking that it was my infected body what caused love to sour. I mean... what else could it be? I did my soul-searching, my positive affirmations... put in some serious couch time at Dr. Saunders'... read books, practiced Yoga, got a BFA... I'm a catch! If it weren't for the damn Herpes. I couldn't have been more wrong. And if you've been thinking pretty much the same thing since your diagnosis... well... brace yourself because, IT IS NOT THE (h). Somehow chemistry wouldn't gel between those who expressed nonchalance and me. Why the heck not? They were decent guys... Why wouldn't I just hold on, give love time... I mean, how many gay men are going to be cool about my condition? The same occurred with those who were infected. Why am I not in a long-term relationship with one of them? If we have this great commonality, why couldn't we work things out? And of those who expressed a sincere desire to stick around... where did the sincerity go? Lastly, of those who panicked... why didn't I try harder to sell the other 99% of me (which I think is pretty great, right?) Romantic relationships are complex, centered around my capacity to love and be loved... The complexity has to do with where I stand in the self-loathing department. Most importantly, this rule also applies to the other person. 11 years of trial & error and amend-making, have taught me that one of the basic reasons why I cannot keep a man is because I am not clear about the qualities & characteristics I desire in a partner. Not just the external aspect but his temperament, grace, ability to respond, communication style, maturity, level of honesty, etc. Is he a man who wears his wounds with honor? Or is he a trickster, a gyp, moving from banana to banana like a freakin fly? The reason HE or SHE left has more to do with them... than with you... or your herpes. Moreover, the reason why that particular person came into your life was to push you further... a little bit further... to your center. A place where you must arrive alone and stripped... a place where your heart booms with love for the self first. Once I get there, if I get there in this lifetime, then and only then will I be able to share all the qualities and characteristics I've sharpened and polished... (a diamond in the rough you are). Then and only then can I step into a relationship and give of my self-generated love... instead of taking for the self alone. Relationship is the place where one goes to give, not take. In the meantime, (h) can be a beacon of light guiding me through dark pathways. Somehow, herpes is stripping layers of dust off of my soul. Peace will come to me. And to you.

Welcome to the forum, Noel!

Have a beautiful week, ya'll... wherever you are :) Big hug. Carlos

Hello everyone! Thank you for taking the time to read (the initial post). I wrote it with all of us in mind. It took me many years to arrive at that point. A full-fledged perfectionist, I had to learn the hard way: perfection is unattainable... and ultimately deceptive. I had to learn that in my desparate seeking, I was forgoing the truth about the human condition: it is in constant flux, seeking not perfection, but evolution. And the truth about ME: that I am GOOD just as I am. I had to lose everything in order to open my eyes. I had to get my heart broken several times, until it opened up. Love goes on. Hearts don't stop booming. I have faith, now more than ever, that everything happens to me for a reason.

Adrial, that's a beautiful find! WOW! :)

Good jobs, guys! here are two by Neruda. “You can cut all the flowers but you cannot keep Spring from coming.” “Let us forget with generosity those who cannot love us” ― Pablo Neruda

A University of Chicago study reports that “we turn to others not so much for guidance, but for rational construction or confirmation of our own way of seeing things.” Journalist Harold Swope warns, “I can’t tell you the formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure: try to please everybody.” source: Barbara Stanny. "Overcoming Underearning"

Thank you for reading! Much love--Carlos :)

Adrial is my friend on FB and surely he comes across my dry humor--which at times can take on a self-deprecating tone--a tone i've adopted not because i enjoy belittling myself, but because i have a tendency to be too private, too contained, too self-absorbed, too serious. Just earlier tonight, after a long day of casting appointments, I stopped at the local sports bar for those of the homosexual persuasion and sat there sipping on Cabernet for a while. 3 glasses later, my neighbor to the right struck up a conversation: "What do your tattoos mean?" he asked. I have 3 so the explanation was in-depth. eventually he confessed that he had been intimidated by the way I sat there at the bar, looking straight at the TV, glancing sporadically to my right or left as if judging my fellow strangers. But i wasn't. i was just winding down from a day of casting calls, and trying to get my mind off the fact that my unemployment benefits are drying up. I was also feeling quite intimidated myself--sitting alone at a gay bar in NYC. The point of this detailed tale has more to do with SEX than meets the eye. How? you ask. well after analysing the easy enthusiasm the strange fellow began to show as the night went on, it dawned on me that i have been so sexually repressed... for years. i'm not saying i was attracted to this man or that i wanted to jump his bones. No. i am saying that i have sat in social settings not living fully in my sexuality, the energy that exudes from each of us whether male or female, gay or straight. Just an hour ago, i started chatting with a FB friend who resides in LA... a visibly attractive man of rare masculine beauty. yet he confessed to me that he does not see that in himself... that it was a "work in progress". I paused... because i can relate. What i am trying to explain here may not have to do with physical beauty, whether you have a six pack, or whether you have JLo booty or Jennifer Aniston hair or Ryan Gosling looks... what i am trying to get at is something deeper, an ESSENCE, a sexual awareness that emanates from self-worth... like a loud yelp to the world: I am MAN. I am WOMAN. I am a SEXUAL BEING and I have a place in the world. Rejecting this essential part of who we are reinforces the stigma around our skin condition (clinically known as Herpes Simplex). I have forgotten about my sexuality... not my urges... or my horny episodes... but this gift which Nature gave to us all. May i dare sit anywhere and exude this essential aspect of me, of my body, of my soul--despite my skin condition known as HSV--and relish, or luxuriate, in the fact that God loves my cock and testicles because God created them... God loves your tits and your vagina because He/She created your tits and your vagina... these "privates" as we've been conditioned to label them are instrumental in the grand scheme of things... and because they are made of skin and once in awhile may exhibit a rash/sore/outbreak/whatever... they do not stop being beautiful and glorious and even magical! yes... magical! we are sexual beings with the power to create babies, to propagate the species, to fill the Earth with our spawn if we choose to... WE ARE GOD. maybe i'm talking in circles here... if i am, bare with me... i just started thinking about my LA friend's lack of self-love for his body, his sexuality... which is mind-boggling and illuminating. i don't know--he may be HIV poz but that's beside the point--i cannot forget that this body i reside in is a gift and that HSV (or whatever virus may reside in it for you) cannot be a reason to belittle the totality of this exquisite creative machine... lets dare to sit quietly, whether in private or in a public setting, luxuriating in the fact that our sexuality (homo, hetero, bi, trans, etc) is DELICIOUS and PURE and UNIQUE and LOVELY and DESIRABLE... for the simple reason that God intended it to be so. Go to bed each night and caress your skin, your genitals, your buttocks, your lips, your feet, your thighs, the body part you like most and especially the body part you like the least, and softly--without aggression or malice--make love to yourself, communicate with silent touches, take time off from the grind at the gym or the yoga studio where all that we're doing is tearing up our muscle in an effort to grow stronger or lose weight... FUCK THAT... caress the belly fat, run your finger tips across your big thighs (or skinny thighs), invent the language your body would want to hear. This i think is acknowledging my worth, acknowledging this wonderful creation which we are leasing as we trek through life on Earth. i decide to remember that when i die, my flesh will brown--wither like a rose--and return to the earth. but what a sexy beautiful rose it is.

Hello everyone! This is a great thread! James81, your writing is hilarious, heartfelt, and very unique. I was born in Colombia but raised here in New York City. I'm fluent in both Spanish and English. And I understand you perfectly, don't sweat the language barrier. Your posts got so much heart and that is what matters here. I wanted to address the question you posited earlier: "Why we got soooo stressed about HSV?. Why we feel like shit? honestly! why? I guess it has something to do with the combo sex/virus/heartbreak/mistrust/lies/ignorance?" I was diagnosed with HSV2 in the spring of 2002--I had just turned 30 then and I felt my life was over. Eleven years later, guess what... Life is still going as normal with its peaks and valleys. I've dated some guys who were cool about my HSV status; others stumbled face-first into a panic... with my help, surely! Oh by the way, I'm homosexual. I use the term Gay often, but I prefer the polysyllabic "Homosexual"... I feel so rebellious saying it, for the word didn't exist in American lexicon until 1892. The word "Gay" was a code word used among closeted homosexuals at gatherings: "I don't know about you, but I'm feeling a little gay," a married man would say to another, fishing for a sexual encounter. Anyway, I've led myself astray... My point is that I believe HSV stigma rises from a great internal conundrum--which is a normal aspect of the human condition--a battle between your desire for safety (status quo) and a desire to push forward into the unknown (change). When the status quo desire is stronger within me, I stop living according to my values... I settle for less... I sell myself short. And deprivation and self-deprecation become the norm. It is my opinion that we use the Herpes Simplex Virus to reinforce the idea that we are diseased and unworthy. Soon we are caught in that great conundrum, not knowing why we feel so shitty. I've been a strong believer that America's schizophrenic view of sex and sexual orientation were the source of this malaise. But lately I have been reading about financial recovery and my relationship to money... I came across a book that talks about the "Starving Actor" syndrome and "Under-earning". I am a homosexual actor. HaHa. And surprise! Every insight found in a book that does not mention STIs and just focuses on money can be directly applied to HSV... it all boils down to self-worth: the value we place on our spirit/mind/body. I'm 41 and as I said, been HSV+ for over a decade. I'm amazed--and this happens on a daily basis--to discover that the source of our desires and their manifestation is within us. Adrial's method of HSV disclosure goes to the heart of this. I've said more than what I intended... I'm on a mission here breaking through the Starving Actor Syndrome. Sending you all much love, C

Hello! I haven't been around these parts as frequently as I would like... hope all of you (and that stud Adrial) are doing well. I think about you often. A facebook friend wrote the quote I'm pasting below; he was feeling inspired and spiritually gratified. I thought you'd enjoy it... it could also work as a just-rolled-out-of-bed-where-is-my-coffee type of affirmation... for those of us who go to bed happy and wake up a little cranky. HaHa. Much love, CARLOS "I am free. I am happy. I wear the smile that assures security and fulfillment beyond any obstacle, setback or misfortune that may occur from here to forever. I have arrived at a place where my flaws no longer hinder me but excel my prosperity. I already have been, and will be, but more importantly: I Am. I do not set myself above the troubles of the world but I will not use it as an excuse or a crutch for pity's eye. My head remains elevated because I know that I will do what the ones before me hoped I would; in my own way. And I know that I am surrounded by the same because these words were inspired and formed from them all. From YOU all. From the stigmas, stereotypes and expectations, I have risen yet remain grounded, certain of my place and my mission. Further I will trek. Higher I will rise. Join me? There's more than enough room." --D. E. Smith--

“If that were God's plan, it's a bad bargain; I don't want to have to deal with a God like that...My sense is God and I came to an accommodation with each other a couple of decades ago, where he's gotten used to the things that I'm not capable of and I've come to terms with things he's not capable of...and we care very much about each other.” ― Harold S. Kushner

Dear Heart_of_Gold2 these quotes have hit the nail on the head precisely at the moment needed! THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU. Had a rough w/e, which should've been a great w/e... but perhaps I rely too much on the fantasies in my head. Whatever it may be... Tupac's quote just gave me a jolt of enthusiasm... I posted it on my Facebook timeline. Have you read Tupac's poetry? If you haven't, I strongly recommend it: The Rose that Grew From Concrete. Much love... CAV

Just wanted to share an interesting article I read in Science Daily. Click and be startled (in a good way). Share your thoughts! http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2013/02/130201090820.htm

hey NRG1117, I hear what you're expressing; you're in a vulnerable place and I've been there, so I can relate. Yes, it's hard to ward off the noise/insecurity that comes up when you've disclosed to someone you're hot for and you want him to embrace you wholeheartedly. Yet I know you can get through this; that you will be okay. I also feel the urge to pull you away from extreme statements such as: "There is really no hope. The mate who is right for me has to be ready and willing to possibly contract the virus. We can take all the precautions there are, but without abstinence, it may/will eventually happen." There are couples in which the HSV negative person remains negative. I speak from personal experience. I've been involved with a guy since late 2009. It is not an emotional/romantic relationship, but there is friendship with benefits. I disclosed from the get-go and he was cool about it. 3 years later, there's no sign of transmission. And I'm sure there are plenty of examples (probably even better ones) to debunk the theory that all is hopeless. I guess what I'd like to achieve here is to guide you away from adopting stories that will not serve you and become a self-fulfilled prophecy. You deserve better! If you need to talk further--or just vent--feel free to contact me privately. I can either offer advice or just lend an ear. Best wishes, Carlos

That's an intense quote by Erdrich, isn't it? It made me pause, her choice of words... So primal and Buddhist.

Hey NRG111U... if this is your first time posting (I haven't seen your fantastic all consonant name before) then WELCOME! I'm 41 and was diagnosed soon after I turned 30 (Spring of 2002). Yes, outbreaks grow milder and your immune system--that's if your nutrition is on point, if you exercise, if you rest properly--will fight off the virus. Yet your body is unable to kill the virus so shedding occurs even when there are no symptoms present. I believe that a combination of anti-viral medication (daily valacyclovir 500mg) and some herbal supplements such as ASTRAGALUS, OLIVE LEAF EXTRACT, and the amino acid L-LYSINE, aide the body in warding off the virus. Many people will offer differing opinions regarding valacyclovir (or valtrex). I too was skeptical; fearing the medication would rot my liver or something. But I consulted two doctors (one of them an HSV specialist) and they both eased my mind... they said valacyclovir is not damaging. I take it (plus the herbals and Lysine) because it eases my mind regarding transmission. I commend you on how pro-active you've been regarding disclosing to your boyfriend. I think that's awesome! You should feel very good about yourself. I think giving him that book (which I've yet to read, and I've read a few) plus the CDC info was a positive, fearless step. I wish both of you the best! In regards to who transmits more, male or female, I would dare say, it doesn't matter. HSV1 and 2 are just part of an 8-strand family of skin viruses (chicken pox and shingles also included). Hence HSV's portal of entry is skin and it hides in the central nervous system... it doesn't care about gender or socioeconomic standing ;) On a final note: it's admirable that you care so much about protecting your boyfriend; and that you've gone thru great lengths to educate him. Ultimately, the person at the heart of this situation (or this new opportunity to learn) is YOU. protect yourself: you body, your mind, your soul. Whether the boyfriend sticks around or not, YOU ARE NUMBER ONE. Best, Carlos

Came across another by Karen Louise Erdrich, known as Louise Erdrich, who is an American author of novels, poetry, and children's books featuring Native American heritage. “Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won't either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself you tasted as many as you could.”

Dear Janice... I just came across this thread. I'm sorry to hear about your friend who's dealing with cancer. That's really tough. We've lost a family member to cancer this year, and what's worst, her daughter just got a cyst removed that was precancerous. You're right, cancer makes herpes simplex seem like a nuisance. It pains me to hear that you've been in so much pain these past couple weeks. I'm not going to go into some elaborate "do this" and "don't do that" speech here. Sometimes it's just best to be present, quietly, and move through the unpleasant emotions together. If it's raining, let it rain... right? I wish you love, and I wish you health. And I'll say a prayer for both your friend and you. Stay strong. You're an inspiration and we need your light around these parts! Your friend from NYC, Carlos

Here's another blog entry with plenty of inspiring thoughts... http://tinybuddha.com/blog/reframing-rejection-getting-rejected-doesnt-always-have-to-hurt/ Happy New Year! Much love, Carlos

dear Skroy--my love--we ain't got wings so forget 'flight'. Most importantly, what you're feeling is justified... Yes, having herpes feels like sh!t. But feelings are vaporous; notice how one day you're feeling this, the next, that. Right now, this new man in your life has come with a message. What that message is, that's for you to discover. All I can offer you at this time, as a 41 y/o gay man with a serious NYC attitude, is this: YOU ARE NOT--AND COULD NEVER BE--dirty, unwanted, unlovable, alone, damaged, unworthy. If everyone who has acquired the HSV virus--be it genital, labialis and what not--came out and got together for a party, we'd need several football stadiums and then some! So I just debunked the 'alone' myth. Adrial wrote a book on 'disclosure'. You can downloaded for FREE here: http://eepurl.com/b4IPP It's back-to-back wisdom; don't waste another precious moment belittling yourself... educate yourself. You've earned it; you are valuable and have a place in the world like everyone else. As time goes on, you will become freer from stigma: mostly, it generates within us. Like a story you've written--with you in the leading role--HERPES reminds us that we have done something sinful and we're now paying the price. But all you did was have sex; and the partner who passed the virus to you is most likely unaware he's a carrier. That is true in most cases, for many people with HSV are asymptomatic. Yet the HERPES story goes on to assert that sex is a dirty deed. IT IS NOT. SEX IS GOOD. HSV is just a skin condition that happens to be contagious. If it wasn't sexually transmitted, would HSV carry the stigma? NO. It wouldn't even be considered an STI... So the source of our shame is in how we define sex, it's in how we label it, sinful. Welcome to the forum! I recommend you read other people's posts; you'll be surprised how normal this experience is... and how manageable. You're going to be okay; in spite of the fear, you're going to be all right ;) Best regards, CARLOS

hey Dimples... thanks for the update. I read about this vaccine earlier in the year; it works with T-cells. I hope volunteers step up. It might be tricky since most people have HSV1 (if the person had chicken pox as a child, HSV1 is present). So to get people who are HSV2 but not HSV1 is going to be tricky. I was diagnosed in 2002 (10+ years ago) and my doctor was so nonchalant about the result while I was dumbstruck. He said, a vaccine will be available in our lifetimes because of HIV/AIDS, i.e., those of us with genital HSV2 are at high risk of HIV infection. Why? because HSV1 and 2 are skin disorders that recur as lesions in the sexy areas of our bodies, hence a portal is present for HIV infection. At first it was believed that men who have sex with men would be the most affected... but HSV 1 and 2 are ubiquitous, affecting people regardless of sexual orientation. There isn't enough Valtrex to further a cause like ours. If I could volunteer I would, but IN 2011 I discovered (via blood test) that I carry both HSV1 and 2, although I experience very mild outbreaks in the genital area (sometimes buttocks) but never above the waist. So strange. I got chicken-pox at 15. OK... I'm babbling now. Thanks again for the link Dimples (great name by the way!) Stay strong. Stay safe. Best, CARLOS