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GreyhoundLover

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  1. I found out about three weeks ago I have HSV-2. I decided to share with a few close friends, as I knew I would need emotional support. What I didn't expect was how hopeless their responses would leave me feeling about my future. My best friend (female) immediately told me about a guy she had dated about four times when he disclosed to her he had herpes. She walked away because "nobody wants herpes!" When I pointed out that I was going to be the person everyone walked away from now, she tried to backtrack and say she hadn't liked him enough anyway, but it was too late. I got the point. I also shared with a lifelong friend (male) who was my first boyfriend. We live several states away from each other now, but talk regularly on the phone and flirt and tease about visiting each other for a hook-up. His immediate response, after wanting to take a baseball bat to the guy who gave this to me, was the say, "Herpes is a deal-breaker for me and for most men." He, too, said, "No one wants herpes." So now I'm feeling like I don't even want to try dating ever again. They're right. No one wants herpes. It is probably a deal-breaker for a vast majority of people when it comes to relationships. I don't consider myself a bad person -- I've been through a ton of therapy in my life to learn how to have healthy relationships and love unconditionally, and it might have been a deal-breaker for me if I was given the chance to make that decision. (Like most people, I was not.) So I'm having a hard time going along with the notion that I'll have a better relationship with someone who will accept the fact that I have herpes, because I don't think rejecting herpes necessarily means a person wouldn't be a good partner. I can't blame anyone for not wanting to risk getting an incurable disease. For the record, I'm 49 and had gone nine years without sex before I met my "giver." I'm staring menopause in the eye and will probably lose most of my sex drive in a few years anyway, so what's the point? Has anyone made the decision to just let that part of their life be over and be happy being single and celibate -- key word being "happy?"
  2. Hi, I'm 49 years old and recently diagnosed after having 3 OBs, all on my sacrum, which is where the original infection occurred. I've never had an OB anywhere else. My question is, even though I am HSV-2 positive, if a sex partner exposed me to HSV-2 on my genitals, would I also start getting OBs there, almost like another primary infection location? Anyone else have sacral herpes without any genital involvement?
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