NJRunnerMom

Hugs to you! I wish I had answers but I've not experienced this but I'm sorry you're going through all of this all at once.

I'm so sorry Sarah. If anything take this as a sign that he wasn't right for you in the long run. I know that doesn't help right now but in time you will see that this will be good for you. Take this time to ficus on yourself and your health. Hang in there girl! Hugs!

I am so sorry you're going through this. Could it be BV? Are you taking any medicine for it?

Darn, I was thinking it may be something else too but if you've been back then it sounds like it is from HSV. I'm sorry you're going through this. What about switching to Valtrex instead? Have you tried that? Maybe acyclovir isn't working for you.

Have you gone back to your OBGYN to make sure these are in fact herpes sores?

I did too! I also feel a little better today so I'm going to do it again and see how my mood is tomorrow.

@beihaigirl2004 I have had your thoughts before. My son is at his dad's the same amount of time as your girls are and those are the lonely nights where sometimes I can't get out of my own head. It's really terrible and I should be making better use of my time but most days I can't get the energy to do so.

That's my thought too. I didn't take mine yet so I'm going to take it before bed as well and see if anything changes. Why not right??!!

I wonder if taking the Valtrex before bed would change anything?

That's a great question because I'm experiencing the same, although I'm thinking that it's more trying to grasp the realization of the diagnosis than anything. I've put on 10lbs since my January diagnosis and I can't seem to get myself together. The ups and downs are really hard and then add in life and it's just even harder.

Thanks ladies! Knowing the type of person that he is I know that he will deny it and claim that he's clean and blah blah blah. I was only with him and we had sex on a Thursday and by Monday the first bump appeared, Wednesday bump number 2, Friday morning I was being swabbed at my obgyn so I know it was him but I can't imagine the thought of saying something and having him flip this on me. It's just not worth it. What's done is done and there's no fixing this so what's the point, that's kind of where my head is.

Same thing happened with me. Positive swab but negative blood test. I know who gave this to me but I'm afraid to say something to them. We don't talk anymore and it was only casual.

I can completely relate to how you feel. In some ways this can be looked at as a blessing but in others I feel like it's a bad curse. Unfortunately I'm not being too good to myself. I keep punishing myself for getting this and being careless about my sex life that I allowed something like this to happen, not that I was given a heads up or anything, but if I was with a steady partner in a long term relationship then this may not have happened. The body aches will go away, I promise that. My best friend was just diagnosed with breast cancer and here I was thinking how terrible H is for me but it is nothing compared to what she is going through so I'm trying to use that as a way to cope. Yes, having this sucks, but it could be worse. Hang in there. It really sucks and this is still new to me as well so I keep hearing it gets better.

Have you been tested to confirm you have it? I wouldn't be jumping to conclusions until you know for sure that you have H, and then go from there.

Hey there. I definitely understand the "alone" thing. I'm 40, divorced, and was not in a relationship when I was diagnosed (I got it from someone I had casual sex with who I had just met) and I had to go through it completely alone. It was awful and really hard but you have to learn how to be okay alone. I know it's not what you may want, hell I don't want to be alone either but the fact of the matter is that I am, but you need to be okay on your own. I'm sorry to hear about your fiancée but it's also good to hear that you did find someone new. Embrace that and don't doubt it. If it's meant to be then it'll work out, if not, then that's okay too. Maybe you can take this time to do a little soul searching too, figure out the "why" behind why you feel alone. We all crave connection and not wanting to be alone but make sure it is for the right reasons. Chin up!

I wish I could just reach through the computer and give you a hug. You said pretty much EVERYTHING that I have felt and somewhat experienced too. I'm 40, divorced, and have a 9 year old son. I had turned 40 less than 2 weeks from when I found out I had this. Here I was thinking that 40 was going to be the year that I find love, the year that I get the last 20lbs off, etc, and now...I just want to give up on everything. Dating is a joke to begin with and add in this layer, forget it. And trying to lose weight is sometimes more of a mental game than physical and mentally I haven't been in a good place for months, so that's a no go at the moment. I'm still trying to workout and run to keep my immune system okay but still, some days I'm just going through the motions. We all get it and I'm sure many of us can relate to how you feel. All I will say is to try to hang in there and find the other positive things in your life to help get you through this until you learn to accept it...I'm still trying to accept it myself.

Hey there, I had the same issue and I'm a runner too so I get it and know how you feel but I can tell you that it gets better and eventually should go away. It took about a full month for me to somewhat feel normal again and get back to doing the things I was used to. Hang in there. Take some ibuprofen if you need to, it'll help.

Well that would be pretty damn awesome if that's the case! Although, what could've made it positive with the swab though? I'm new to this so I don't have any advice and will probably wait a year or so to get tested again to see what my levels are.

Thank you for sharing this. H is all new to me and I have experienced the exact same things that you've mentioned. I'm still at the part of feeling like I'll never find love again and hating myself for having this. I'm glad to hear that he was able to help you get through this. 🤗

Thanks for posting this. A cure would be really nice. I'd even settle for a vaccine at this point as well to at least protect the people we're with so we can't transmit to anyone regardless of how safe or aware we are.

Hey there. I had the same issue with the leg pain. I'm a runner so I can sympathize with how you're feeling. It took about a month for the leg pain to go away for me and feel somewhat normal again, physically at least. I did take some ibuprofen and that seemed to help it a little bit. I would take it about an hour before either running or working out and it helped on some days. And for me that was the last symptom to go away too. Hang in there. I know it's frustrating. I was just diagnosed in early January so this is all new to me too.

I wish it were too but maybe that's a good thing in that this is not something that is as big of a deal as us newly diagnosed feel that it is. I just got HSV2 last month and I'm still having a hard time coming to terms with it. In fact it took about a month for all the symptoms and side effects of my first outbreak to go away so now that I'm "feeling" a bit normal again I'm venturing back into the dating scene but I know now that it's going to be different. Trying to navigate this new norm is a bit tough to figure out so I enjoy reading what people post in here to give insight, tips, advice, etc.

@snowflake123 Nope, not taken that way at all. You're young and these are the years to have fun, so to speak, so I definitely understand what you meant. I was kind of the opposite. Got in a long term relationship at 20 years old and never had that experience of just casual sex so when I got divorced and then left a bad relationship 1.5 years ago, I took a break and then entered the world of casual sex last year and unfortunately that's how I ended up in this position. So I do get it, I just experienced it later in life.

Hey there. Unfortunately I don't have any advice for you since I'm newly diagnosed at 40 years old with HSV-2, but I definitely understand how you feel when you say that you feel that your sex life is over. I think regardless of age, many of us feel your thoughts. It's definitely not something any of us signed up for and it's sad that we are the knowing ones who now carry this burden on us to have to disclose to other people. I hope you can somehow find a way to get through this and know that this doesn't define who you are as a person, you just need to make small changes in the sex department. Chin up. 😉

Is it true that if the swab is positive then there's really no need to go any further? That's what my doctor said when my blood test results came back negative. He said it was too early to show up in my blood but the positive swab was enough to know that I have HSV-2 and positive is positive and there's no need to test again. 🤷‍♀️