Ellemina

So, it was just confirmed that I have both hsv2 oral and genital herpes! Based on what I have read oral transmission of hsv2 is pretty rare...and it just so happens that was my luck if the draw! I was hoping for a type 1 diagnosis and was thinking that is what it was based on the oral infection. So, here I am...42 years old with hsv2 oral and genital!! I am in shock and trying to figure out what to expect. I am scared. I read that sometimes the type 2 oral infection only happens one time with the primary infection. Other information suggests that I could have a reoccurrence of oral every time I have a genital reoccurrence. The idea of dual reoccurances scares the living daylights out of me!!! As I’ve shared in a previous post...the person I’m dating is supportive. Had anyone experienced simultaneous type 2 oral and genital herpes infections??? What can I expect - a life of hell???? I appreciate any information, experiences, etc. Thank you so much!!

Dear NJRunnerMom, Thank you so much for your kind and compassionate response! Yes, already herpes is teaching me about self-acceptance. My best friend always says that I don’t love myself nearly enough and maybe herpes came into my life to finally teach me to value myself. Perhaps that is why our bodies open is up to the herpes virus in the first place. It teaches us the hard lessons about ourselves that we couldn’t previously face. It’s hard to accept that I contracted it through unwise choices (one night stand). It’s like I knew better, but I was probably disassociating and self-sabotaging due to the pain and loneliness from my fiancé’s death. I read someone on here that life sometimes kicks you when your down and takes your lunch money. I appreciated that sentiment as that’s what this feels like - life kicking me when I’m down, taking the lunch money, and running away with it. Thank you for specifically saying embrace this new dating experience and don’t doubt it. Needless doubts can be a form of self-sabotage. I can tell already that this is a mental/spiritual process of self-acceptance as it is physical. Thank you again!!!!

I was recently diagnosed with oral and genital herpes. I live alone and while I’m dealing with the diagnosis - I can’t help but feel alone. I found out when dating someone new and disclosed as soon as I thought something was off. In the short time I’ve known him he has been wonderful, rational, and supportive. We had sex before I knew and he is getting tested this week. However, I don’t think it’s been long enough for antibodies to build up in his system (if he were positive). He says his feelings haven’t changed, he is neutral about it, and it is what it is. Things are going well for the beginning stages of dating. I’m just afraid that one day he will change his mind and decide to end things over this. It’s too early on in dating (only a month on Tuesday) and if this doesn’t work out I know love is out there. I’ve known a person or two who has herpes and they date and lead normal lives. The worst part about this is feeling alone...living alone...and going through the initial outbreak by myself. Yes, I have his support, but it’s not the same kind of support as an established relationship. It just sucks...I just want to be held and told everything will be alright. I’m 42 years old and just want to be held. Yup, I’ll admit it. The uncertainty of his result and the guilt of unknowingly putting him in danger is obviously hard to handle. I’m grateful for his friendship if that is all it turns out to be. I just thought life would be so different! Back in August my fiancé passed away from a heart condition . After his death in found myself desperate for love and connection. I have a strong belief that I got this from a one night stand (before the person I am dating now). I think that person knew he had it just by the way he acted afterwards. I’ve gone through a lot of pain I love. I’m just hoping that the current dating situation is different. I just don’t want to be alone.