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stamatia

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  1. I can tell a guy 100 times and he can be ok with it 101 times, but I'd feel guilty for life if pass it on to him :S
  2. Hey HerryTheHerp :) thanx for your answer. I'm just so paranoid I will pass it to someone, despite being cautious to the max :| well, almost. I'm still deciding whether I should go on suppressive therapy or not.
  3. So it's been almost 2 months since I got herpes. I'm not on suppressive therapy, but I do take lysine and different vitamins daily. I've read all sorts of stuff about H, but I never found an answer to the following question. Maybe it will sound a bit stupid though :) In some percentage of time there's asymptomatic viral shedding, I'm aware of that. If H-free person is infected through asymptomatic shedding, does she/he gets an OB in 2-12 days right away or does the virus "sleep" and a person outbreaks when immune system is low/is under stress, etc.?
  4. I'm having such bad couple of days. At first I was coping with the fact I got infected ok, but now it's just panic in my head. It smothers me that sex things won't be the same again. What do I have to look out for? No rough sex anymore? I won't be relaxed with constant worry it might be too rough. Now, when my first OB is over and with every itch I'm worrying another OB is on the way. I'm just so angry at sad at the same time I'm not me anymore. For the rest of my life I will have to worry about it. Everytime I will go on summer vacation it will always be in my head it might outbreak again. It's just too much to handle, so many things I need to have on my mind.
  5. Aww, thank you! I love your posts you're so brave and full of hope! i love it! I was wondering, I read OB can happen during period, I'm always using tampons, but I'm afraid I'll just "push" everything inside. I just can't stand the thought of using pads, esp. when H is boasting down there.
  6. Just wanted to share my story and get a couple of questions answered. A week ago I was diagnosed with HSV 1, which is my second STD (how lucky am I, huh?) and I don't sleep around or something. I'm also positive for high risk HPV, after laser surgery in February at which they removed all abnormal cells from my cervix, virus still hasn't go dormant. So back to herpes and how I got it. Basically, I was just super unlucky. I got it from a guy, whom I've known for years and since we always liked each other, were attracted to each other, we occasionally slept together. We used a condom, but because he had wounded lip from playing saxophone and because his immune system was low (he got ill the following day) and he had oral herpes before - though didn't show any signs of outbreak at that point, so when he performed oral sex on me, he passed the virus to me. Few days later I noticed a bump on my vagina, but I thought that's just an ingrown zit. A couple of days later even more bumps appeared, that's when I heard an alarm in my head. I went to my gynaecologist, she confirmed herpes and put me on Valtrex and Virulex cream. I guess my first outbreak wasn't as bad as I read with some other people. I had a slight fever, body ache and swollen glands. But only for one evening, well swollen glands lasted for few days. It did hurt for a couple of days, but not too much, only while urinating and whenever I took a shower, when I had to wash my vagina. The feeling of all bumps was just grotesque to me, everytime I put cream on I went eeeek. "What have I done to my pretty pink butterfly???", was in my head all the time. Also I don' think my blisters broke, is that possible? They just withdrew. Now, after a week, the condition is a lot better. Only small redish spots are seen on my vagina and it's still a bit sensitive. How I felt when I realized I have herpes. I was in shock, I asked myself what else will I "catch"??? Basically said OH MY GOD in every language I know. And of course what will happen with my sex life now, esp. for someone who absolutely LOVE sex. I'm still worried about that. I know myself and I know that from now on everytime I will have sex, I'm going to worry all the time if I will pass it to my partner. Does that mean the end of oral sex or what? It's not going to be the old me ever again. I know I will panic for every itch I get down there. This is why I want to go on suppressive therapy for the rest of my life as I'm terrified I will pass it to someone else. And the funny thing is I'm not angry at guy, how is that possible?! I know that blaming him won't help me at all, it won't go back in time and fix it and change the events. I'm a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. I know now that I took my health for granted and I know now I will have to be extra cautious about my immune system (along with my vitamins, I've also started drinking noni juice). Honestly, I'm maybe weird, but I haven't had a cry about herpes thing until now when I wrote this. And I'm a huge cry baby :) I'm really happy I found this forum, so I can read all the stories, can feel with people who go through the same and I found so many useful info, because quite frankly I didn't have a clue about genital herpes before, I just knew it was one of the STDs. Many, many hugs to all of you :*
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