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DistressedLady last won the day on May 31

DistressedLady had the most liked content!

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  1. Great post. I wish I had read it a few months ago. I disclosed to my ex before we were together and I absolutely honestly believed if we were careful - that he wouldn’t get it. I’m mostly asymptomatic and have only had mild outbreaks - so I thought the chances of him getting it were small. That said it was always on my mind because of how much I cared about him. I took daily medication and we used condoms every single time. There was probably like a 2-5% chance he would get it and he did. And obviously he is so upset. I can not explain how bad I feel for passing it to him him as it
  2. Awwww that almost made me cry!!! That’s exactly how it should be! What a lovely man and I wish you both well. It doesn’t and shouldn’t be this big deal. It doesn’t make us bad people or dirty or diseased like some people make us feel. That’s such a lovely thing to read and has made me realise that how my ex is behaving is just unreasonable and so unfair.
  3. Hope you are doing ok. It’s great that she’s being open with you while she tries to figure it out and work through it. I think that she’s showing she doesn’t blame you and while she may not feel ready for a sexual relationship right now - she might when things settle down. You are doing all you can and once you’re still communicating things can improve. hoping you both are feeling a little better!
  4. Ah I’m so sorry to hear your story. One part of me is like ‘what the heck is wrong with everyone - it’s just a cold sore?? if it was the other way around I wouldn’t care once we were together’. The other part knows how hard it is to have to tell someone and be rejected for it buts all just the stigma that’s associated with it and not the actual sores themselves as they can be managed. I don’t understand how someone can say they accept the risk and then turn and run and be angry and punish you when you don’t even know that you could be passing it. You didn’t do it consciously- you woul
  5. That’s really lovely. My mum keeps asking about my breakup and is convinced we will get back together but I can’t tell her the reason as I think she and dad would be shocked beyond belief. it’s so nice to hear your mum support you like that and to have someone to talk things through in new relationships.
  6. Hey I hope you don’t mind this answer but I really think that stopping was the best thing - for him and for you too. I say that because I was taking anti virals AND we used condoms and I had no visible sores and I gave it to my ex. It can happen and I would rather be in your shoes feeling upset about being rejected than feeling guilty because that 1 slip up left your ex with HSV. I know rejection SUCKS - especially because of this - but the guilt of passing it on is worse. in a week or so you won’t care about the rejection - you’ll be relieved you didn’t take the risk. Deep breaths a
  7. Hi I had an outbreak and then didn’t get another one for years and years and years. Stay healthy, happy and dress free and it will definitely help!
  8. Ah thank you. I know you are right. He meant the relationship was broken beyond repair - but it did really hurt. He was so good about it, so understanding and telling me not to worry, it was his decision. It would be much easier if he didn’t have it and I could walk away guilt free but I will always feel bad for passing this on to someone. I would never want anyone to feel as bad as we all have here. Hopefully with time he will get his head around it. thank you so much for your kind words and understanding. It really helps stop my head exploding with guilt and sadness!!!
  9. Thank you for your insight. I think it goes out of all proportion in your head if you let it and I think that’s possibly where he is right now. I’m so upset as he knew and said he wanted to stay with me regardless but when he did get it he turned ran away. I’m so confused. We had been so so so so so careful - it’s just not fair. He says he doesn’t blame me but he must. He said we are ‘broken beyond repair’ but I didn’t even know I had done this and I would never have knowingly hurt him. I am giving him space and hope he can figure it out in his head. I thought if he did get it (years dow
  10. Thank you for your thoughts and insight. So much hurt and pain for a cold sore. How did such a small thing become so big and so shameful that it breaks up relationships and hurts so many people? I don’t think our relationship will recover and I’m starting to accept that. I did my best and am so sad at what’s happened but I can’t do anything to change it. I guess if he loved me he wouldn’t care about this so I need to just try to move on. thanks again to those who replied.
  11. I hear you. It totally sucks. It’s just a cold sore in reality but we totally beat ourselves up over it. I disclosed after 12 years single. He choose to stay with me and I was so happy but he had a change of heart and decided he ‘didn’t want to risk it’ after a few months. This is after he got a blister on his penis so I think he may be too late - even though I did everything to protect him(long story). It’s not fair and it really hurts. Especially when you’ve been so honest and open. I’m sorry for what’s happened to you. I know you have to stay positive. I think maybe these have d
  12. I hope that someone can please help me and provide some advice and insight. I have had HSV2 for many years. I got it from an ex boyfriend who cheated on me. It has taken me a long time to get over. I met my partner many years ago but we only got together recently. He is a very kind, quiet and caring man. I am absolutely mad about him. We began a relationship and I told him about my HSV2 before we had any physical relationship. He thought about it and made the decision to stay with me. I went on Valacyclovir and we used protection EVERY time. He recently told me
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