lostsoul520

Hey Everyone, First let me start by saying everyone on this forum is awesome and I appreciate everyone being so loving and accepting. I have had H for about 3 years know and Im still getting to know my body but for the most part i can tell when im about to have an OB. I am in a happy open fully disclosed relationship but i wanted to know what others think and do? Ive seen this question come up and I know there is no real true common answer but I thought this category might be the place to see what people have to say and if they can share their experience. How long do you wait after your ob to get back to sexual intercourse? Its crazy to find some non sense on the web but I feel there might be others who just wonder about this. I know i do and love to hear other peoples stories about their "down time" and when they feel its ok to be active again (of course being fully disclosed) Thank you

Hey there. I just shared my similar story as well. I didn't disclose till after a certain amount of time. I know exactly the feeling you are going through but coming out clean was the best. Just have to own up to it but be safe at the same time. There are amazing people on here to have your back and help you through these life lessons. Hope you feel better.

Thanks for the comments. I know I messed up and I'm trying to learn and grow from this and to be there for her. I've found more stories like mine as I searched more last night. We all feel the same and feel horrible about it. Thanks for not judging and thanks for honest responses.

Well this is my first post. I join back in 12 and thank goodness I've found this site and community. I need advice and honestly just failed. Like everyone I hit a low point when I got the news. I felt that it changed my life forever. I was ashamed and honestly wanted to end my life. I started to turn to alcohol and pain killers to numb reality but luckily with this website I bounced back and had a new outlook on life. The people on here are amazing and this is where I fail... I finally started to get back into the dating world. To my surprise I found that in a really close friend I had throughout the years. We became close. She was amazing. I started to feel normal again. We didn't have Any sexual relations at all. I didn't want to and I wasn't ready to disclose. I never thought she would accept me. Anyways we had our ups and down but this year things changed. We stared to get closer and one drunken night it went down. Yes through the passion and attraction it went down. Had unprotected sex. I didn't disclose. One thing is that before this until this day I do take my acyclovir twice a day to suppress it. I know my body and know when I'm about to have an ob but only 3 times a year but nevertheless that's not an excuse. You would think that I would have disclosed after that night but i did not. We continued to have a sexual relationship. So far she doesn't have any symptoms but that doesn't mean anything. I couldn't take it anymore. I had to tell the truth and finally came out. I was scared to death but i was my fault that it had gone this far. I disclosed everything. Told her the facts told her my story and she listened. I became the monster that I feared. I feel horrible because as we read in our community we should disclose no matter what and I failed to do so. Well she is still here but is having a hard time trusting me. I don't blame her. I thought by taking my part in knowing my body and taking my meds that would be enough and it wasn't. Only the truth would be the answer. I feel horrible because our relationship was heading in the perfect way. To my surprise everyone ... she said she is not bothered by the h. Only hurt that I lied so long. I was so scared that she would never accept me I kept it to my self but honestly, coming out is the best thing. When I did come out it did feel better but disn't correct my actions. We are working things through but it's difficult. I've looked through the forum to see if there is any similar stories to my situation. I'm not perfect and not asking for sympathy but to hear any other stories of what happened. Am I the only one who has made a mistake like this? I'm so sorry to my girl and to this supporting community because I failed to be honest and transparent. I love her so much but feel that I honestly ruin the relationship. Thanks for letting me tell me story. Any advice or stories would be great. It's hard to discuss this with my friend but thankful for this community.