Hello all, I am new here but not new to having herpes. I have been diagnosed with genital herpes for over 10 years. In that time frame, aside from the person I was with when I found out, everyone I have been intimate with since has been someone I already had a close relationship to. While it was still a tough conversation to have, I wasn't as fearful of having it because I knew the person and I knew they weren't going to reject me in an insensitive or negative manner.
I am back in the dating world since my divorce August 2020. Again, I decided to date a guy that I already knew and it ultimately turned into crap. So I have recently decided to not go down that same path anymore because it hasn't ever done me any good.
However, with this decision comes the responsibility of having the disclosure conversation with people I don't know. Basically I stranger to me. I am terrified. I am filled with anxiety. I have so much self doubt.
I started chatting with a guy November 2021. We text every day. I have only met him in person once due to scheduling conflicts. I am hopeful this will bud into a legitimate relationship. I know there is sexual chemistry due to some of the conversations we have had...and the hot and heavy make out session we had when we met. lol
My question is, when do I say something? How do I do it? Right now our means of communication is via text. While it may be easier for me to type it out and hit send...I just don't know if that is the right method. I am the person who wants to try and read the person. A lot can be said without using words.
I have not been met with rejection before, but I chalk that up to the fact that all the people I have told and been intimate with already knew me and had some sort of relationship with me. This guy is essentially a total stranger. I am trying to put it off for as long as I can so maybe he will fall for my personality and this won't be a big deal. However, I don't want him to feel like I have wasted his time and kept this secret from him. I could just be in my own head about it.
I really like this guy and don't want to screw up any possibility of an actual relationship. He is different from anyone else I have been interested in and I am hopeful that this change of pace is exactly the kind of relationship and person I need in my life.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.