Beachgirl16

Thank you both for your comments. Still no word…. but I do feel this is more about the H than it is about me. It doesn’t define who I am. I’m filling my life with friends and family and telling myself that what’s meant for me will stay. It just stinks when you’re honest with someone because you start to trust them and they seem to just run away. But it’s better to know now.

I’ve been dating a man for 6 weeks. I just disclosed the other night. He seemed understanding and of course thanked me for telling him. He said he’d do the research and let me know how he feels. This waiting is horrible. It brings back all the feelings of shame and scrutiny I felt when I first found out. What makes it worse is how most sites online are not really accurate! I was devastated until I found this site and got more information that puts the risks of transmission into perspective, especially how low female to male transmission is…. But that’s not what he’ll see. He’ll read all the crazy information like how you can get it from just touching someone with your finger… ( I just read this on one site yesterday!) I know I’m worth more than this, but this still hurts so much to possibly be rejected for something I can’t control 😞

A year and a half ago, I was where you are now. I couldn’t look at anyone in the face, I was so ashamed. It takes time. You realize that it’s not your fault. It still sucks, and I don’t know when the switch flipped for me, but at some point it does. In the meantime, take care of yourself and give yourself all the love you deserve. It’s beyond annoying that we’re all made to feel like this for a skin condition.

That’s horrible. I’m sorry he did that to you!

I’ve recently started spending time with someone and we’ve started to become intimate. I disclosed before we got too far…we’ve fooled around but so far haven’t had sex. The other night he performed oral on me and now I’m worried that he’ll get it! he’s the first person I’ve been intimate with since I was diagnosed over a year ago. There is just not much info on the rates of transmission of HSV2 through oral…. I read that it’s rare that it will transmit to another person orally, but just don’t know…help?

@Sumshine how do you know the transmission rate is less than 1% ( him giving you) orally? I’ve been looking to find those rates and had not been successful! thank you 🙏

I asked my doctor about this. The shingles vaccine is not a “live” vaccine so it’s safe to have while still taking Valtrex.

If you have an active sore or outbreak, go the doctor or clinic and they swab test it. You wouldn’t have to wait at all. Takes a couple days to get the results. And either way, you don’t have to wait. There are blood tests that will show ( if you’re positive) either the short term or long term antibodies.

Hi all, I take the suppressive dose of Valtrex to reduce recurring symptoms, with good success. I know the risk of transmitting is statistically low, but I’m still concerned about transmitting it. if I want to become intimate with someone and I only see this person once in a while…. If I take an extra dose of Valtrex, would it further reduce the risk of transmitting to a partner?

Thank you Grace! I’m going to take some time to myself and will get through it /over it. I agree with you that I learned about him. It just stinks that I’m the one left feeling bad about this because I can’t change the situation. Thanks again for the kind words of support. ❤️

I’ve been chatting with this guy for three weeks. (He was on vacation, then I was,) and tonight was supposed to be the first date… he texted me a couple hours before, saying we should probably talk about our health and asked about any std’s, etc. So I told him I have hsv2… then he postponed the date. Says he needs to digest it. My first herpes rejection. I respect his need to process, but it feels so wrong that we talked about this before we even met…. Maybe it’s good I probably vetted out someone who was just interested in sex? Either way, this feeling stinks. I hate having herpes. I’m usually pretty optimistic but this feels awful right now. 😕

Hi all, Just diagnosed a couple months ago with HSV 2. After the initial ( horrific) outbreak, I’ve been getting mild outbreaks every few weeks. Some of them are really minor and if I wasn’t in full alert mode, I might not really notice them. my question is this: should you medicate with every outbreak even if they are really minor? Or maybe give my immune system a chance to work on it? I just feel like I keep medicating and not sure the right approach.

Hi, yes my diagnosis was confirmed with a swab test, during my first OB. Now that I know a bit more ( all I do is research these days…) I’m wondering if he had the igm or igg test….do doctors look for both results in one test? This is still confusing to me… Thank you so much for your response.

So I was recently diagnosed (12/2021) with GHSV2. The partner I was with at the time, who had no symptoms, got tested, as he assumed he gave it to me. He told his Dr. about the situation and the Dr. suggested the antigen blood test, which came back negative. I hadn’t been with anyone else in a while…. Is it possible for the test to have been falsely negative?? Wondering if I should go back to past partners to let them know and try to see where I got it?? I had been sexually active with him for about a month when my first OB occurred…

Thank you for responding and for the kind words. It’s been tough, but I’ve learned so much from this forum already and am grateful for it. 🙏