Howl23

Thanks again for the information and support! So you're saying it may not have been from the recent waxing? I would think that if it was from the cheating 9 months prior, that she would have had some sort of outbreak back then? The extreme outbreak and flu like illness aligned about 10-12 days after waxing. I've read a bunch online that usually the first outbreak is the worst. I'll see if the test has more details, or at her next visit they can do another test. Yes the guy is a real jerk, threw away his marriage for a bunch of college girl side action. He was cheating before marriage too. I even told him he shouldn't get married. He's a drug addict, alcoholic, racist, sociopathic liar with rage issues. Sadly he had 2 kids with his ex and I'd bet there are more he isn't aware of or is ignoring. The guy is bad to the core, just puts on a good act. I never thought he would do this with her, he always had plenty of girls to choose from. Apparently he was on court ordered sober house arrest and played up the lonely friend card. She hid the hanging out and texting from me. She said he wanted to hook up the first time they hung out and she drew the line and said friends only. Visit #5 "he crossed the line" and she gave in... Had I known sooner that they were texting I would have definitely put a stop to it and clued her in on his ways...😞She doesn't know the real him... She knew he had hit rock bottom from addiction though. She didn't know he was a serial cheater. I think she truly regrets it and I don't think she would do it again with any other guy... I guess part of me thinks it could have been worse.. it could have been her falling in love with a guy, or getting a more serious STD. I'm working on putting it behind us.

Thanks for the kind support! We've been through a lot this past year or so. Most would likely go their separate ways. I've thought about it.. but at 40+ that is tough to start over. We have a business and home, etc. together. Our personal situation is unique, which I won't elaborate on that now, but gives us motivation to move forward together. She had a wax at this place before maybe around the time she cheated (within a month or 2). It has excellent reviews but it is in a weird mostly industrial area (odd....). So based on what you said it does align with my thought that she was exposed there. vs. with him. Would any test result help determine that? We aren't sure what test they ran, they only told her it was positive for HSV2 and negative for HSV1. She is seeing her OBGYN in about a week. Based on the link you shared, the risk without protection is 4%. I think I'd rather take the chance.. as I have no desire to re-enter the dating scene even if we separate some day. I know HSV has a lot of stigma and is mostly a skin disorder. I have bas psoriasis in a few areas, which also has a stigma (grosses people out). The cheating is never justified.. Apparently they had secretly been hanging out and texting as friends a few times over 6 months. She swears it was only sexual the one time. After all we went through I think it does explain her vulnerability and I am 100% sure he was the one to take it to a sexual level and persuade her at that vulnerable week (we had some bad news). I still am haunted by the mental images of them being intimate... more so because I know what he is like... He is a fit, ripped bad boy with a criminal record... and that is not what she has ever been into. We both had known him for 10 years. He knew how to play the friend card to get some action 😞

We've been together nearly 15 years. Unprotected sex about 13 years. About 9 months ago she cheated with a former friend of mine, they had a protected one night stand, which I found out about a day or 2 after. I'm guessing the guy has HSV2, ever since I knew him he was always cheating on his gf/wife. No idea though. Last time I contacted him to let him know I knew that he slept with my wife, he denied it and threatened me. Obviously I'm hurt and upset by her decision to hook up with him... she has been battling some anxiety and depression issues after we had a miscarriage... she caved under persuasion from him. We talked about it at length and this was the only time. We want to stay together, so I have forgiven even though the visions constantly play in my mind. She had no symptoms or outbreaks after the one night stand. Fast forward to a month ago, she had a Brazilian wax a few days before Valentine's day. A week later she came down with some viral bug (sore throat with severely infected tonsils, swollen glands, high fever) that lasted 10 days. About 3 days in, she had what she assumed was a yeast infection that later led to 2 lesions on her vagina (one on the side, one at the bottom near her anus). Extreme pain. Dr. did a swab test that was positive for GHSV-2. Blood test confirmed (no igG was run though). I tested and it came back negative today. We have sex 4-5 times a week, almost always have. Did she possibly get HSV-2 at the waxing place? The severe outbreak was about 10 days later... Or did she get it from him 9 months ago? Or was it dormant for 15 years? ? (Yet I never caught it) Moving forward, we want to stay together and have sex as usual. I've worn condoms since, but I really dislike it... and we want to have kids. Do I just forget about it and go unprotected and avoid sex during outbreaks? What is the transmission risk? Can I still give her oral without a dental dam? Also, she likes using a mini egg vibrator during penetration but now seems afraid to use it with a condom on me... worried the vibrator will tear her or the condom and cause an OB...