ChanelChanel

This is inspirational! I am so tired of feeling like I'm hiding a secret. This isn't something to be ashamed of but the stigma could make you feel like you'll be judged. I want to free myself of the stigma... I just don't know when I'll be ready and how. I'm proud of you too!

HEY EVERYONE! THE BEST WAY TO FIND A H BUDDY IS TO NOT ONLY POST HERE, BUT SCROLL THROUGH THE PAGES AND FIND SOME PEOPLE OF INTEREST, THEN MESSAGE THEM FROM THEIR PROFILE PAGE. There ARE H buddies to be made- I have three that I now consider friends! (Even found a distant cousin here, who I am grateful to have met due to this site.)

Glad to hear! You two stay strong (:

@JohnB yes, it is the difference in how they are aquired is what creates the stigma with ghsv2..... It's not that we got "caught", it's that sex is a risk period. And herpes goes to show us that bc there are many ppl who caught it with the condom on. Herpes does not discriminate... Yet we are here by chance. And there are many of us who were in relationship even married but caught it .. We feel guilt bc of the stigma.. not the other way around. Adrial has a post that talks about where the stigma originated from. I am going to find it and post it here... ppl didn't even pay herpes any mind and just thought of it as acne. It wasn't until someone wanted to make money off it that it became aa big deal and was brought to the public attention.

@melanie (:

I'm sorry to hear that this has come at what SEEMS to be an inconvenient time... it seems so much easier to go on without knowing, but everything happens for a reason even the "suckiest" of things. It is time to think positive, but to prepare yourself for whatever is to come. We all want things to stay the same and love the ones we are with. Nothing is wrong with that... I hope things grow stronger between you too. And I hope that you are sharing the love with yourself as well.

True that! I'll definitely make sure of that now. Haha. Thanks as always.

Hi Melanie. I have... my initial OB was only severe itching for two days and later a few flesh like bumps near the opening of my vagina that I'd noticed but the doctor didn't... pretty mild. They didn't blister or anything.. I didnt get flu like symptoms and pelvis pain until Feb with no OB since the first. Herpes is quirky... symptoms varies depending on the person. Have you been diagnosed for confirmation... there are other things that cause blisters.

Sorry. I need to stop using my phone bc I don't understand why it keeps doing this lol

Ok. So unprotected sex could increase your viral load and cause an OB? Well anti-virals reduce shedding... could two H+ partners be able to have unprotected sex as much as they wanted?

Ok. So unprotected sex could increase your viral load and cause an OB? Well anti-virals reduce shedding... could two H+ partners be able to have unprotected sex as much as they wanted?

Okay so I was on a website of this doctor who is suppose to be very informed about Herpes. (I need to find the website again.) I am not sure if she has it herself, but it is possible because she seems to know a lot. She allows visitors on her site to post questions and in one of her answers to a H+ couple. She said something about not having unprotected sex during an outbreak bc you can increase your "viral load". Hmm... What does that mean?? Can it happen while asymptomatic shedding? I'm just curious. Can anyone make sense of this?

Also, everyone above covered everything perfectly... I just chimed in bc I have a bone to pick with you @Wakeup13 ... Why are you taking so much of the responsibility and ownership? They could have given it to you just as much as the other way around. It is JUST as fair to believe that. Plus, you shouldn't assume you are the only one they've been with. There is NO WAY to tell who had it first. And if there was oral sex, one of them may have oral HSV, which could have been passed to you genitally. Symptoms can show within 2 to 12 days after expose usually. (Mine did at 2) The symptoms happened after you messed with them. If you do talk to them, which you should I would definitely make it an even playing field. This will release a lot of that negative energy you got going on involving this. You don't even have a sure diagnosis to have so much worry :P And this could also be something else. I would definitely wait 'til testing is done to confront them with confidence... but I'd mention to them that something is wrong. Oh, and we all have done and many continue to do things that are risky... such as unprotected sex. BUT usually we would have no regret or feel bad about our actions if something like this didn't follow. THEREFORE, let it go. No self pity or regret, just a lesson learned :)

@everyday_normalguy, what she did was completely insensitive and wrong. Don't take it personal; sometimes things happen to test other people's character. She will reflect on how she did you when karma visits her. And trust me, Herpes just did you a favor bc had this not happened you would not have picked up as quickly that she would be willing to disregard your feelings like that. You should thank her. Hm. Even if she may have been scared, she could have been respectful of your feelings... I don't understand why people don't see that they could EASILY EASILY wear these shoes... as common as HSV is. (esp since condoms don't always cut it either). She has pissed me off.. Anyway, back to what's more important... YOU. You seem like a sweet guy. Please don't be down. Dating is never easy... and finding the right one is even harder, herpes or no herpes. We all have some fear. Just keep trying. I commend you for disclosing... The right one will come along. STAY STRONG :)

Hello and welcome a1an_n. I do not have hsv 1 so I am not too familiar but I know general input that I hope would ease your mind. You seem pretty worried. It is hard to say whether or not he has herpes and was having an outbreak bcuz you are right... there are other things that can mimick herpes.... I definitely could be a canker sore. From what I've learned herpes 1 can appear inside the mouth gums lips but more likely outside the lip. Oral HSV is very very common bc it's usually caught during childhood and therefore no one really thinks much of it. Many dont know they have it and it's often not tested for. Although it is becoming more important to take necessary precautions for oral sex... due to likeliness of transmission to the genitals. If you are feeling really uneasy about it, you could get tested WEEEEKS even months from now. You haven't shown symptoms and it definitely hasn't been long enough to tell. There is nothing to swab for a quicker detection. I believe IF you do have it you are likely to show symptoms within 2 to 12 days. For the future, I would be more careful probably get my own tube or mouthpiece so that I wouldn't have to worry anymore. Others will chime in later in the am. You will be fine (: I would relax and try not to lose any sleep by worrying..