Strengthfromwithin

Kristin... I so wish you could have been there as well. You were in my thoughts :)

Hi everyone :) I'm not sure where to begin to explain the experience from this weekend, but it was simply life changing. For anyone considering going, but you're on the fence, you will not regret it. Maybe you have an underlying fear of not wanting to have to talk about herpes for 3 days straight, please know the weekend is anything but that! It's 3 days being surrounded by the kindest, most supportive, loving people you'll ever meet and once you get there you realize it's not even really about herpes. There's a bigger picture of love and self acceptance, regardless of what your struggles are... Maybe its herpes, maybe it's something else. But If you are seeking love, peace, kindness, forgiveness, guidance, strength, hope... the list goes on... You will leave this weekend a different person. It's really a spiritual awakening in the most amazing way for wherever you need it most in your life. The relationships I formed in 3 days are ones ill never forget and ones I hope to keep close to my heart forever. Thank you to everyone I had the pleasure to share it with <3

I will be there... Cant Wait!!!!! :)

This made me cry reading it.. in such a good way :) So happy for you and proud of you as well!

OMGosh is exactly my response too :( This breaks my heart in so many ways for you. I'm sorry she didn't disclose, I'm sorry you contracted, and I'm sorry she validated her actions by being an angry "man hater" insinuating you deserved it or something...UGH! That's awful, immature behavior and you deserve so much better. I don't know your girlfriend, sounds like her description of herself is VERY true, but you are not a piece of crap and please don't ever feel that way. Don't get dragged down to her level or stay in the relationship because of fear no one would want you. Millions of people will want, love and accept you... and the right one surely wont treat you the way she did. Sorry to be so judgmental about your girlfriend, but were a family here supporting each other and hearing something like this is upsetting. The relationship doesn't sound healthy or supportive. How will you be able to love and accept yourself with a person who holds such anger and disgust towards themselves... and shes trying to make you feel the same disgust in yourself. Don't! Understandably your heart is aching but filling it with support and love from this community will help heal it... staying in a situation like that will not. Huge hugs for you, here to talk anytime :) xo Alex

kitcattat I can relate to your story in a lot of ways. Obviously some days will be harder than others but it sounds like you have such a mature, grounded head on your shoulders and its phenomenal you can already see a positive side to something like this happening! I agree, since you can't change it and go back might as well use this as an opportunity to focus on self improvement and "getting right in the head" hahah... joke ;) Look forward to chatting more!

Kristin, This is amazing! Loved every word of it :)

It does get easier! Everyones body and immune system are different, so unfortunately there is no easy answer to give people to when exactly that is... but be assured it will. Im only 4-5 months in but i think by 6 months you'll definitely have a better idea of what your out breakouts will be like, severity, and how to avoid them. In the meantime as lelani said take this opportunity to take care of yourself physically and mentally. Be kind to yourself, forgive yourself, love yourself and remember this can happen to anyone! Young, old, sexually active, or someone having sex for the first time. Millions and millions of people have this "skin condition", which is why its so commonly spread, so never feel you are alone. At first it is a scary experience to go through, but it will get easier... Especially the more you realize how common it is in our society. These challenges only make us even stronger people in the end too. Remember you always have a support system in this community with people that know exactly what you're going through and will always be here for you :)

I'm in Denver, CO... if any Rocky Mountain peeps need to talk :)

Scornedvillager- "I am a confident, sexual person and now, instead of experiencing multiple sexual encounters, I really look forward to finding "the one" and exploring the vastness of my sexuality with one person instead of the exploring the shallow depths with many partners." This is so well put, and exactly how I feel. Thank you very much for the welcoming... I look forward to being an active part of this community!

Happens to me on work PC and my Mac at home.. and my iphone for that matter haha

Hello All, My name is Alex, and I had my first outbreak about 4 months ago, just a few days before my 31st birthday. It was shitty, I'm not going to lie. In comparison to others stories I've heard my first wasn't that bad but the pain was still unbearable at times. I couldn't do anything, and for about a week my quality of life was zero. But the pain is temporary, your body will heal, you mentally recover, and just know it probably (hopefully) won't ever be that bad again! It will get better! For me there wasn't a huge emotionally devastating period some people suffer with. I instantly accepted herpes and almost had a strange sense of relief come over me. I had been living a somewhat reckless lifestyle in terms of dating and sex. I haven't had a serious relationship in close to ten years, mainly because of moving all over the country, lots of traveling, and living a very independent lifestyle. Overall I was just very comfortable and happy being single. But earlier this spring I really started evaluating my life and my relationships. I wasn't feeling good about myself or the decisions I was making. I was a sexual object to men, and that was all. It seems so obvious now why I wasn't forming deep bonds and emotional relationships with people, though I think I always chalked it up to having "commitment issues". I was too quick to jump into bed with someone. I decided I was ready to make serious changes in my life. I wanted to be 100% focused on myself and improvement, not being distracted by sex. I decided to try and be abstinent for at least 6 months and then reevaluate. Ironically after Ive had this major moment of clarity and am starting to make the necessary changes in my life, I have one slip up with someone I thought there was potential for serious with, and am pretty sure I contracted herpes from him. I just tell myself that even though I had already wanted to make these changes in my life, sometimes drastic things need to happen in order for you to really be able to execute them. So that's where the sense of relief comes into play. The diagnosis is forcing me to change the way I live my life instantly, which is something I had already been wanting to do... but saying is often easier than doing. I do look at herpes as a blessing in a lot of ways now (you can look at it negatively or try and find positives in it). Lets not kid anyone, when you're having an outbreak its not fun... But in retrospect things could be so much worse. What I take out of this on a deeper level is I suddenly have this gift to look at my life in a way I hadn't seen it before. I wasn't respecting my body or taking care of it in the way I should be. If you don't respect your own body, you cant expect other people to. I now have an opportunity to truly get to know people on a deeper, emotional level, without sex complicating things right away. If there is person I'm meant to be with in this world, that will love me unconditionally for who I am, I'm going to find them this way... not the way I was living my life before. I think its also important to say I don't feel shame about my past. I am a very sexual person, a confident woman and I have no apologies for being sexually active. Its just unfortunate it took "this" situation for me to realize that all the sex I WAS having wasn't even fulfilling. It was drunken, empty, pointless sex with no connection. But you live and you learn and now its on to the next chapter. Having regrets (and anger) really wont help you move forward. So this is my little introduction. Everyone of you is beautiful and its an honor to be among so many brave and inspiring people :)