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lifehaschanged

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  1. I’m so grateful to be sitting here writing my success story. When I was diagnosed with H, I had a really hard time with it and what I thought it meant about me and my dating life going forward. I seemed to think about it constantly. I would run scenarios in my head about having “the talk” daily and quite honestly, it was exhausting. I stopped living my life and started worrying all the time about something completely outside of my control. Then I met someone and had to deal with it or run away…. Sometimes I felt like bolting, but here in front of me stood this amazing man who really cared about me and valued me. I knew he was worth the risk. We talked all the time and it felt easy with him. After about a month, I really felt like I could trust him and knew regardless of how he felt about the H, he would respect me. I just knew. I struggled inside with telling him and the annoying nagging in my mind was driving me nuts, so one night I decided I’m telling him right now. I told him I had something important to talk to about and since I trust him and I feel like our relationship is moving forward, it was something he needed to know, before we could go any further. Then I asked him if he had ever heard of a cold sore. He said “yes”. I said “do you know what virus it is?” He said “yes”. I quickly said “do you get them?” He told me he used to when he was a kid. Since, I have type 1, that was really good news to hear. I explained to him that my last boyfriend did too and through oral sex he had spread the virus to me genitally. He seemed a little confused and did not even know that was possible. I told him since he already has the virus the likelihood of me spreading it to him genitally is extremely low, however there is a chance. He responded “is that what you needed to tell me? You’re not getting rid of me that easy” He also said he wanted to research it a little on his own, but no big deal. Then we went on talking about other things. It has never been an issue. We have been intimate since then and he has no problem with it, at all. He loves and adores me exactly as I am. He truly is such a gift in my life. It is amazing how much freedom came with telling him. I no longer have obsessive thoughts and H doesn’t control me. I realized I was the one that had made it such a HUGE deal in my head; it was my beliefs and fears that had created all this dread. Love it far stronger and greater than H ever could be. I hope this story helps just one person. Please know when you find someone that loves you for who you are nothing else with matter, not even H.
  2. I stumbled upon the words written below today and I could not resist sharing with everyone on this site. I truly believe the road to healing is Self-Love. I had an amazing day today and it felt great to speak to myself with kindness and love. Sending love and hugs to everyone :) 12 Ways You Can Love Yourself Now Learn helpful tips for self-love This is written by Louise Hay I have found that there is only one thing that heals every problem, and that is: to love yourself. When people start to love themselves more each day, it’s amazing how their lives get better. They feel better. They get the jobs they want. They have the money they need. Their relationships either improve, or the negative ones dissolve and new ones begin. Loving yourself is a wonderful adventure; it is like learning to fly. Imagine if we had the power to fly at will? How exciting would it be! Let’s begin to love ourselves now! Here are the 12 Commandments to help you learn how to love yourself: 1. Stop all Criticism. Criticism never changes a thing. Refuse to criticize yourself. Accept yourself exactly as you are. Everybody changes. When you criticize yourself, your changes are negative. When you approve of yourself, your changes are positive. 2. Forgive yourself. Let go of the past. You did the best you could at the time with the understanding, awareness and knowledge you had. Now you are growing and changing and you will live life differently. 3. Don’t Scare Yourself. Stop terrorizing yourself with your thoughts. It is a dreadful way to live. Find mental images that give you pleasure, and immediately switch your scary thought to a pleasure thought. 4. Be gentle Kind and Patient. Be gentle with yourself. Be kind with yourself. Be patient with yourself as you learn the new ways of thinking. Treat yourself as you would someone you really love. 5. Be kind in your Mind. Self-hatred is only hating your own thoughts. Don’t hate yourself for having the thoughts. Gently change your thoughts. 6. Praise Yourself. Criticism breaks down the inner spirit. Praise builds it up. Praise yourself as much as you can. Tell yourself how well you are doing with every little thing. 7. Support Yourself. Find ways to support yourself. Reach out to friends and allow them to help you. It is strong to ask for help when you need it. 8. Be loving to your negatives. Acknowledge that you created them to fill a need. Now you are finding new positive ways to fulfill those needs, so lovingly release the old negative patterns. 9. Take Care of Your Body. Learn about nutrition. What kind of fuel does your body need in order to have optimum energy and Vitality? Learn about exercise. What kind of exercise do you enjoy? Cherish and revere the temple you live in. 10. Do Mirror Work. Look into your eyes often. Express this growing sense of love you have for yourself. Forgive yourself while looking in the mirror. Talk to your parents while looking in the mirror. Forgive them, too. At least once a day, say “I love you, I really love you!” 11. Love Yourself... Do it now. Don’t wait until you get well, or lose weight, or get the new job, or find the new relationship, Begin now- and do the best you can. 12. Have Fun. Remember the things that gave you joy as a child. Incorporate them into your life now. Find a way to have fun with everything you do. Let yourself express the joy of living. Smile. Laugh. Rejoice, and the Universe rejoices with you!
  3. I loved this post, thank you for sharing. BTW- your man sounds amazing, I am so happy for you :)
  4. First, I'd like to say thank you from the bottom of my heart for this wonderful website. It has been an amazing to have a place to come where I know I am not judged or alone. To see others have gone through this experience before me and come out on the other side and used this "dis-ease" to open themselves up and find self love. In doing so, many have attracted a wonderful mate who accepts them for exactly who they are, regardless of having H and the fearful stigma society has created about it. When I was first diagnosed with H, I had a whole bunch of fear based thoughts running through my head, I'm sure everyone reading this can relate. Why me? Will anyone ever love me again? How the heck am I going to tell someone this and have them accept me anyway? Why didn't I do this or that differently? Wow, this shit is for life! I could go on an on... Those thoughts started to get momentum and uh oh, I realized it was all I was thinking about day in and day out. Then, I had a new thought. What if I consciously decided to think something different? A thought I could identify with that feels better than those thoughts, it didn't have to be so far out there that I didn't believe it. However, what if my new thought pattern sounded more like this - I am not alone, many people have H. It is certainly true, we are all on this website for that exact reason. -There are people before me that have had the same diagnoses and found love. True again, take a look at the success stories section. What if I gave these new thoughts momentum? They would in turn produce more loving thoughts. I have the power within me to stop the negative broken record and put a on a new one. I like this idea, it is empowering and gives me hope. Today is a new day to begin and change the record. I know there is a beautiful gift in all this. Possibly I needed a wake up call, I may have wondered off path headed down the wrong street in a bad neighborhood and boom, H!! Guess what, now I'm listening! There is no way I am going to give up on my dreams because of this, why? Those are my dreams, I deserve every single one of them and the ones I haven't even dreamt yet! I will embrace this journey as I learn to love myself more fully and more than I ever knew possible. I will accept this "dis-ease" since I can not change it and acceptance will give me peace. Then I will allow the universe to show me all my dreams, better than I ever imagined. Namaste
  5. Hi, I was recently diagnosed with HSV1 genital. I am female and live in Florida and would really like to have a support buddy, either Female or male. It would be nice to talk with someone that understands what I am going through. I feel like I think about it all the time... I am so grateful to have found this site.
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