ihaveittoo

Hello, I would return to the doctor. Sounds to me like you should be taking an antiviral suppresivly for a while. Sorry if I spelled that wrong. This phones auto correct was way to aggresive so I turned it off.

Hello avigail, I'm a 47 year old male, been H+ 27 years now. I was in your shoes back then. Didn't talk to anyone about it. I thought it was all over too. Being on this forum and venting is a step in the right direction. Hopefully you have been reading through the forum. Read through the success stories. Peoples lives do get back to normal once the initial shock wears off. Have you considered going to a herpes support group? I assume you live in the NYC area, I have to believe their is at least one fairly close to you. Meeting others did wonders for me. I believe it could do you a world of good. Its scary as hell at first, but you'll quickly realize how normal everyone is. I know that after I attended a couple meetings I felt a hell of a lot better about life.

Hello meggie0330, As someone who has lost nearly 70 pounds since January I say congratulations and job well done. Losing weight can be tough when temptation is lurking around every corner. Knowing how difficult it can be for a woman to lose weight, you have shown that you have amazing perseverance. That perseverance is what is going to help you through this. The early days of having this virus are the hardest. Once you have yourself educated, know your prodomal symptoms and more or less get used to having the virus, you won't think about it so much anymore. That will take some time. It's kind of like the grieving process. Denial, anger and acceptance. That is more or less what you are in the midst of now. Dancer and I are old timers at this. We've both had this virus for well over half our lives and it really is nothing more than a blip on the radar. This site is the best place you could have come to get your H education. You will find many wonderful people who are at various stages along the H highway. So, take a deep breath, exhale, put one foot in front of the other because life does go on.

@eched I hear ya on the alchohol front. That played a prominate role in my contracting H. Its amazing how invinceable you seem after you get a few beers down the hatch. I agree with the others, you need to get type tested. After 27 years this October at my next doctor appointment I'm going to ask her to order up the test. Back in the day I had 3 different outbreaks swabbed and they all came back negative. They (US Navy doctors and corpsmen) would never do a blood test. I eventually accepted the fact I have herpes and got on with life. As I have said before, if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck...it's herpes. Over the years my outbreaks have varied. Some have blisters, some look like a bad rash. Sometimes it just itches like hell but there is no visible outbreak. Ultimatly herpes plays by its own rules.

Acyclovir has been around long enough now that it should have a generic which would make it alot cheaper. They need lots of money to pay for those Valtrex commercials. There was also a drug called Famvir. I was prescribed Famvir once but I don't think it was very effective for me. I was only getting a 125mg dose as opposed to the 200mg of acyclovir. I had the doctor prescribe Acyclovir the next time around. Acyclovir always seemed to halt an outbreak quickly. The Famvir did not. I believe that I probably needed more than 125mg. The wife and I tried one of those female condoms once in the days before we tied the knot. Damn thing didn't seem to want to stay where it was supposed to. Thats not a good thing when you want to get real busy.

I tried it many years ago and it did not seem to help. BUT, I recently found out that 1500mg a day is what you should take. I was probably only doing about 500mg. It won't hurt for you to try. Many people believe in it. Good luck on finding the cure. If you are successful you'll be remembered in the same breath as folks like Jonas Salk and I'd say thats pretty good company.

Hello and welcome. Not really sure about this. I would consult a lawyer. I would assume you would have to obtain some sort of medical documentation that would prove he had knowlegde of having the virus prior to you testing positive. Unfortunately that could be very difficult. Even if he lied about not having sex during the time you were seperated he may have honestly not known he had it. Theres really not much more I could say about it. Others here may be more knowledgeable about the legal angles of this. As far as finding a husband someday, don't sweat it. Not all of us guys are total shitheads, but I must admit we all have our moments. In time you will come to know the virus better, how it affects you, your triggers and prodomal symptoms. Once you have a grasp of that you will be a safer partner than 90% of the population. Plenty of guys out there will understand this once they are educated. Don't be afraid to check out everything available to you on this site. Participate in the forum. You are not alone in this world, trust me.

@willow Thanks for posting the link. I tried lysine years ago and had an outbreak within a month. I came to the conclusion it didn't work for me. Looks like I wasn't taking near enough. Damn internet, where where you in 1992?

Very happy for you Willow. You've managed to do in 6 months what took me 10 years. To all you newly diagnosed who read this I cannot stress enough how lucky you are to have this site available. Back in 1987 when I was brand new to this, all the info that was available was in a pamphlet. No internet, no real effectve means to network with others. Please don't hesitate to comb this site for all the information you can glean from it. Don't hesitate to jump in on this forum. No question is so stupid it should not be asked. No fear or despair you may feel is totally unique to you, we have all been there at one time or another. Herpes is no more than a speed bump you hit at 70 mph when you should have been doing 25 mph. Sure its one hell of a jolt at first, but after you come a complete stop, catch your breath, and possibly need a change of underware, you get on with life. I would say Willow is a perfect example.

My wife and I are both H+, and as the previous poster said you can shag at will. The only exception being during an outbreak. Herpes and friction are mortal enemies. We have had two daughters together and herpes was never a factor in either delivery. The oldest came vaginally, eyes wide open. An amazing sight I shall never forget. The youngest came by way of C section. Not because of H, but because she was folded in half with her head between her feet. No way was she coming the old fashioned way. In hind sight it was also a sign of the contrarian person she can be. She is every last bit a teenager now. Fear not, life can proceed as usual.

@ThisIsMeNow All I can really say is that these early days with herpes are the absolute worst. Life all of a sudden seems pretty overwhelming. With 27 years experiance under my belt now(pun more or less intended) the best thing you've done is come to this site. It took me nearly 10 years to talk to someone other than a doctor about this. I never told any of my friends from before I got herpes about this, even to this day. Just before I got out of the service I filled a 90 day prescription of Acyclovir. About a week or so after I got home I got careless one day and left the bottle on top of the dresser. Mom, being nosey like moms tend to be read the label. Being a nurse she looked up Acyclovir. The next day she comes to me and says "do you know what those pills are used to treat?" In my mind I shouted out HOLY SHIT! A very quite "yes" came out of my mouth. She proceded with a very short lecture about herpes. I kept my mouth shut. That was the only time it was ever talked about until I came across a herpes chat room on AOL. At that point the herpes world began to open up for me. I began to communicate with others who understood. I began to realize that I was not alone. Statistics were put out there that showed just how common herpes was amongst the world population. One night while in the chatroom, me and another person in the room discovered we were from the same geographical area. He passed along a phone number for the local herpes support group. I called up the number and listened to a recording. Learned the group had been around nearly 15 years at that point and that meetings were held once a month. I remember that the next meeting was about 2 weeks away. Nah...I can't go are you crazy! Anyway, I ended up going. I over came my fear and went in that room. Wow, these people look so normal. Hmm, that guy is a lawyer. Hey this other fella is a fireman. The guy to my left is a car mechanic, and that lady next to him is his girlfriend. Your kidding, she doesn't have herpes? WTH!! Talk about having your eyes opened. I left that meeting with a whole new perspective. Herpes is only as bad as you make it. I guess what I'm trying to get at is that this herpes business takes time. Time to learn about. Time to get used to having and dealing with. You have reached a point of communicating with others about this that took me nearly 10 years to reach. Keep it up. Stick to it. You can do it. Sometime in the future strongly consider seeking out a support group. That in person interaction with others was a revalation to me. I think that it could be for you too. Whenever your ready, no rush.

Attending a support group meeting is one of the best things you can do. I went to one for the first 18 years ago this month. You will meet people with a broad range of experiance, from the newly diagnosed to the 20+ year vetrans. Attending the first meeting can be nerve racking. I'm sure you probably have some fear in the back of your mind about actually walking into a room with a bunch of strangers and talking about herpes. I can tell you that I did. After a few minutes I realized everyone was just as normal and average as me. There was a lawyer, fireman, auto mechanic, a mother and housewife. No monsters or boogeymen. You will find youself amongst understanding friends. At the end of the meeting you may find yourself looking forward to going back again.

@WCSDancer2010 Thank you for the welcome. I have read many of your posts. All I can say is you da woman. Wish I had half your communication skills. I have never been very good at saying what I want to say...you make it look so easy and I really appreciate that. Keep up the incredible work!

Hello Canuckintx. Although I only registered on this site yesterday I was in your exact place 27 years ago. This really sucks in the beginning. Knocks you right on your ass, the ultimate slap upside the head. You wonder, where do I go from here? The good news is you found this site. I lurked in the shadows here for a couple of weeks. I can tell you there is loads of great info on this site and plenty of shoulders for you to cry on here in the beginning. You are not alone. When I was diagnosed back in 1987 all I got was a tri-fold pamphlet and a bottle of acyclovir. Beyond that all there was was crickets, tumbleweeds and the rustling of leaves. Don't be afraid to ask questions, vent frustrations and learn from other peoples experiances. I have never used Valtrex. When I used acyclovir I usually had relief in 24-48 hours. I imagine Valtrex is about the same. Since my wife and I are both H+ I haven't used acyclovir in over 15 years. After 27 years I can tell you that in time everything will be alright. You may want to call bullshit on that right now and thats ok too. The most important thing right now is to educate yourself and take care of yourself.

Hello all, been lurking here for awhile and thought it was time to finally come out of the shadows. I'm a 47 year old male and have been H+ for 27 years now. Got herpes while a young Marine stationed overseas. Although I never tested positive, if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck...it's herpes. I had the outbreaks swabbed on three different occasions, once within twelve hours of the start of the outbreak. All came back negative. One doctor told me at least 30% of herpes cases will never test positive. He assured me that what he saw was without a doubt herpes. He prescribed acyclovir and it cleared the outbreak up lickity split. Over the years the outbreaks came and went. Over the next 10 years I avoided relationships for the most part. I got pretty good at it. Did go out with one gal in that period who was hsv1+, but it didn't work out for reasons not related to herpes. In 1996 I got online. Discovered a herpes group on AOL and for the first time really interacted with other + people. This lead me to an ASHA sponsored HELP group in my area. (Unfortunately it no longer exists) For the first time I interacted with others face to face. Talk about a huge relief. Learned alot from those meetings. Then one night on AOL I met the woman who would become my wife. She is also H+, so H really became a non issue. We've had two daughters together. Fortunately H did not become an issue during there births. Over the last few years the outbreaks have really slowed down. They have become really mild to seemingly non existant. To anyone who reads this who is newly diagnosed, you are very lucky to have this site available to you. Back in 1987 all I had available was a pamphlet. This site can help cut years off your emotional recovery. I would recommend looking into a HELP group if one is available in your area. Google ASHA, they have a current listing of groups. Meeting others face to face can be a HUGE help. I'll wrap it up here. Just remember life is not over by any means. You've just ended up on a slight detour.