FF1

I mentioned somewhere on one of my posts that I communicated with a Virologist regarding the most effective way to use anti-viral drugs. His position was to let your body fight the virus on its own and take anti-viral medication as reinforcement when you first sensed an outbreak coming on. This allowed your immune system to become effective in combating the virus without help. Today, I went to a new Urologist. He was very helpful and had lots of info consistent with what I have read here. I posed the same question to him that I asked of the above mentioned Virologist. He asked the same question of a "highly respected" Virologist. His answer was that much in the same way bacteria can develop resistant strains to antibiotics if you don't take it through to the end of the regiment, the same can be said for a virus. By taking anti-viral drugs only when the first signs of an outbreak occur, you run the risk of a virus which will mutate into a strain which could resist the anti-viral drugs. His suggestion is once daily regiments and upping it to twice daily with the onset of an outbreak. Just sharing info...

@Inka: I was looking for intelligent responses. Tattoos across the forehead? That just serves to try and make me feel ridiculous. Nice try, but it didn't work. HSV is a non-life threatening condition. So to include conditions such as HIV, AIDS, Mental Illness, Cancer, Heart Problems, Brain Problems... none of those are contagious and do nothing to support your point.

In the short time that I have been on this forum, the subject of a "cure" has come up more times than I can count. We've all agreed that a cure for Herpes isn't one which is very glamorous and not likely to fetch much interest in the research community. So we rely on the internet for support and information. I have sometimes wondered; what is the purpose of making such graphic images available while searching for information on the subject? At first, I thought it was sensationalism; the entertainment that comes with that "wow factor" when such images pop up on the screen. But then I began to look at the source of such images. To my surprise, many of the images were sponsored by "reputable" sites which provide information and support for our condition. While I don't see the benefit of viewing such photos for people who already have Herpes, I can see how in the minds of the medical community, why such photos can be useful. Photos like these act as a deterrent to people who DON'T have Herpes. I think photos are a propaganda campaign by the medical community to discourage H- people from taking on an H+ partner as this will help contain Herpes within the positive group and prevent the group from growing. Think about it this way; if all H- people refused to engage in intimacy with H+ people, the H+ group will stop growing. As the years go on, through old age and death, the H+ group would continue to shrink. Eventually, the H+ group would go extinct, taking Herpes with it. Problem solved. I know... I'm out of my mind. Right?

I won't be comfortable until I can make an informed decision; I don't have enough info to do that, which is why I am asking here.

@Jennie: You present a valid point. Thank you for turning the tables on me! LOL

@Willow: She did say "warts". I'm wondering if I want to compound my situation with this.

Does anyone know about HPV? I disclosed this evening with a potential partner and she disclosed that she has HPV. I don't know what to do with this info. I've done plenty of reading from reliable sources. It doesn't seem like a big deal and at my age (50), the one vaccine that they have for males isn't recommended beyond 26 years of age. My concern is that I already am H+ and I don't know if I want to add this to the inconvenience of being H+ Any thoughts?

Also... I don't think you should inform him. If he didn't catch it from you, then there is no harm done. Why open this can of worms and disclose if you don't intend to be with him again (do you?) and he may not have it?

What this guy did to you is called "RAPE". You were unable to consent to the sex... that's rape.

I'm with Dancer.... It isn't likely that you are experiencing symptoms after 1 day. Was this the first time you were with her? If not, then you may be experiencing symptoms from an earlier encounter. If this was the first time, then it isn't likely that the symptoms you are experiencing are from an OB... its just you freakin' out.

Can someone please provide their point of view on the following question: Why do you feel the need to disclose to someone with whom you are not going to be intimate with?

Give up on a cure and learn to live with it Seeker.

@Forgiveness - Thank you for those kind words. Yes, there was much about her that I found to be desirable (and I am not talking physically). As I continued to try and educate her, it was more than ignorance. It became clear that there were many other emotional issues in play.

@ forgivenessandpeace: I question your motivation... Is it really about protecting others or perhaps it is about getting your pound of flesh from him.

Some here will disagree with me, but I inform people of my status on a need to know basis. Unless intimacy with the person is imminent, they DO NOT need to know. I can't speak for anyone else, but I get irritation and a tingling sensation on my butt, thighs and sometimes lower back when the virus is on the march. I immediately start a twice per day dose of anti virals for 7 days when this happens and then go another 7 days without intimacy before allowing myself back in the game. When the time comes and i am in a relationship, I might consider anti virals daily for supression. Dancer has some good links to literature and videos which I am sure she will share when she reads this post. Sorry to throw you under the bus Dancer.

@WhiteDasies: Apply the Hydrogen Peroxide to a fresh cotton ball and then apply it to the sores and hold it there. After a few seconds, you will feel it bubble and tingle, so you now it is working. After a few minutes of that, feel free to then scrub the sore with the cotton ball to satisfy the itch. Then let the area air dry. When you get dressed, dump some baby powder down the front of your underwear to keep it dry. Carry a small bottle of baby powder and some alcohol preps to apply this treatment throughout the day.

When it comes to disclosure, I think the longer you can wait, the better. Here's why: When you wait as long as possible, your partner has had a lot of time to get to know the person you are. They develop an attachment to you which is emotional and not just physical. So, when you finally disclose, there is a lot more for them to consider other than you're being H+

Yes... it does sting a bit more than hydrogen peroxide. But it works great; dries things up real fast. I see it as an attach from both sides... internal and external.

My question would be this: Why would your doctor recommend and antibiotic cream when we're dealing with a virus? As far as dealing with the sores; I find that cleaning the area several times a day with hydrogen peroxide is a great way to keep the sores clean and accelerate the drying out. Also, carry alcohol swabs with you. They are portable and allow you to clean the area when you are out and about.

I've been meaning to start this discussion for the last few days. Then I read NeverDanced's "stupid question" and decided now would be a good time. In the 28 years that I have been h+, I have taken a lot of pride in that I have never passed anything along to any of my h- partners. I attribute this to many things: 1. Paying attention to what my body is telling me - At the first indication of an OB, I begin a 7 day regiment of anti viral and upon completion, wait another 7 days before getting back in the game. 2. Wearing a condom - Although I have been in relationships where my h- partner trusted me to go without one, that I would do everything I could do to protect her, understanding that I could not make guarantees. 3. Grooming - While I agree that shaving is just better, I've maintained a short, thick growth over the years. My thinking here is that hair acts as a barrier, covering an area that the condom can't. So before I start having sex "through the fly", I'd rather try this approach.

Hello Golddust :) Two things come to mind after reading your post; Ignorance and Judgement. That you can't see your nieces/nephews because of your diagnosis... that you Mom can't see them because she cared for you when you were sick... that is ignorance on the part of your family. The word Ignorance sounds negative. Webster defines Ignorance as "a lack of information or knowledge". And I think that is what you have where your family is concerned. I know how you feel. I recently tried to deal with someone who hadn't any knowledge on the subject. She relied on the internet for information without vetting the sites from where the information came. People who rely on Wiki for their information on this subject are destined to get the wrong information. I would suggest providing your family with information from sources you KNOW are true and accurate. Dancer was kind enough to provide links to the handouts, eBook and videos. I took them all, dropped them on a flash drive and handed it over to the woman with whom I had the "talk". You can't make it any easier than that. I would suggest you do the same. I find people are lazy and unless you do the work on this subject for them, they will never get it. The other thing that concerns me is how judgmental your family is about you being H+. Personally, I've chosen to keep this a secret about myself. I've shared it with no one other than potential partners. That I share it here is no great feat as we are all anonymous. I would thank your family for their prayers but I would also suggest they pray that God doesn't judge them as harshly as they have judges you. FF1

Yes... there is a lot going on there and I know what I have to do. While I am open to discussing it, that subject isn't what this board is about. I can't help but be concerned about her, but I won't let it get in the way of doing what I need to do for me.

I take pride in breaking speed records; 2 hours for you may be an hour for me. LOL

I pop and then cleanse with Hydrogen Peroxide a few times during the course of the day. Yes, it stings a little, but by the next morning, it is completely dry and scabbed over. Lots of baby powder down the shorts for the next few days to keep it dry. Within 2 or 3 days, it clears up.

Also... NYC is a big place... there must be someone else here that will be accepting of my status. I don't know that I am going to pursue the relationship with this woman. Before the talk, she impressed me as someone who isn't very well grounded, emotionally speaking. My biggest concern if I end it with her; she will be devastated that she was rejected by someone with H.