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hdiari3s

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Everything posted by hdiari3s

  1. Omg said buts lol i meant nuts lol
  2. I know that buts are a trigger but are seeds in the same class? Like chia seeds, sesame seeds? Does anyone know?
  3. even if you arent religious i think the symbolism can speak volumes
  4. I know its been posted a few times but what are some links to send that provides general information on herpes? I tried searching
  5. @mmissouri yes I was working with the therapists to deal with other issues but its mainly issues that have been exacerbated due to h. @wcsdancer2010 I asked both if they had experience working with clients with this diagnosis and they said yes they have a few they have been working with for awhile. The first one even asked me if this was my sexual experience because it seemed she couldn't wrap her mind around the fact that I got this while my giver used a condom. But in the few sessions we had she was able to help me work through my fear of never being good enough for a man now due to this diagnosis and she also really helped me put some other things in perspective. I think she really was just ignorant to hsv and how it works. And I get it all therapists wont know everything, they are human but something as traumatic as what I went through and as sensitive as h, they really can do more damage than good due to their ignorance. So im wondering if I should email her and tell her how her lack of knowledge affected me during these sessions and attach all this info and depending on her response reconsider her or if I should schedule a session and bring everything to the session or if I should just find someone new. The process is just so draining especially with my insurance. And yesterday was just hard for me. Its like man h really does bring all your insecurities to the surface.
  6. My first therapist was so great in the beginning. Like I really felt I could do a lot of work with her. Until she questioned how I contracted h saying she has never heard that it can be transmitted with a condom 2x and asking if I didnt see the sores on my giver when it was transmitted. I explained asymptomatic shedding and she looked doubtful about that being true. After that session I was angry and sad. I entrusted her with such private information and she didnt even believe me. Also she made a comment about my choice not to take st johns worts for my anxiety bc of the , correlation it seems to have with infertility and asked if I would rather h make me infertile by damaging my cervix since anxiety can cause ob's. I left her and started with another therapist and just didnt feel a great connection and like much work would be done. My question is, is it a bad idea to give the 1st therapist another chance but first educate her and tell her that if she is not knowledgeable about h her sessions may end up.causing me more damage than good but if she can consider educating herself more then perhaps she can really help me through this. Who knows this may help other clients. I really want to go back to therapy though. Today was rough....what do you all think? Should I just try to find someone else. This is a little exhausting. Besides not having a connection the 2nd therapist alluded to me not having to disclose right away even before intimacy. She said its my business when to tell. This really bothered me and she said it a few times. She said its not contracted that easily and I shouldn't disclose until we are in a relationship. Where do these people get their info?
  7. And you know I appreciate your encouraging words chica :) we luv u 2.....
  8. I also struggle with this. However ive come out to about 7 friends...my closest friends and they were all supportive and it helped a lot! I havent told any family or aquaintences though and though at times I do feel like im holding back im glad I have a few people I can confide in and for me thats okay because im sure they also have secrets they choose not to reveal and I would rather tell the people I trust and know this information is safe but the feeling does suck. Maybe one day i will get to the point where im okay with others knowing but for now this is what im comfortable with. In ref to dating, I find that when some men approach me I do not even consider the possibility of dating them because I want to avoid the stress of it all but if we never try or take a chance we will never know what the outcome could have been of a party or a date or a trip and so forth. Recently I went on a trip and really considered canceling it at the last minute bc of my h depression and even came down with an ob 2 days b4 my departure. I was bummed and cried the first 2 days of my vacay but it healed quickly, it stopped consuming my thoughts, i met some great people, became more in touch with myself and I had such a great time overall and in retrospect am so glad I didnt chicken out due to my depression stress and fears. Im still not fully over this diagnosis and experience and may never be but it will get easier for us and we should try not to pass up on potentially great experiences because of it. Hope this helped.
  9. Update: didnt cause an ob and I didnt double up on meds. Thank God. Just kept the area dry and it went away on its own. Also didnt get an ob associated with my period this month its been almost 4 months since ive been diagnosed. Im now on suppresive meds so perhaps that has been helping. Thanks for the replies and advice guys and gals :)
  10. Thanks guys! And I was actually trimming with a scissor well I was actually using a smallnscissor to trim and knicked myself but figured it was the same as knicking when shaving. I was just scared the small cut would turn into a lesion. Im just a little paranoid. Been so cautious.
  11. Im sorry I have so my questions guys but if you nick (not sure this is the right spelling) basically cut yourself while shaving will this cut turn into an ob is you have hgsv2. Should I double up on meds? Thanks
  12. Thanks dancer. Came down with a bad cold and trying my best not to trigger anything.
  13. Does anyone know if cough medicine like dimetapp can be a trigger since it contains alcohol and if it can interfere with valtrex? Thanks :)
  14. Went to my new therapist yesterday and she says "wait if he used a condom, how did you catch this? So I explained about the skin to skin contact transmission. She goes on to say she has several clients who has contracted this and never heard of skin to skin contact so I explain about transmission again and she just looks at me strangely and changes the topic. How can I continue to see a therapist that doesnt even ACT as if she believes me. I agree with dancer, the professionals definitely need to be educated. Then she prescribed st. Johns worts for me to help with the anxiety and depression and my research shows me that it has links to infertility which scares me to death. I bring this up to her and once again she has never heard of this and says if you dont treat your depression you may not have children anyway do to herpes lesions on your cervix since you arent treating ur anxiety and depression. Ive come to the conclusion that at times we will be much more educated that the people we seek for help. Its sad but I guess if we remain aware of this it will make it easier to find a provider that will be helpful.
  15. Such a coincidence that you posted this. I just had a full blown anxiety attack but I actually suffered from anxiety before but hsv has taken it to another level completely. I think there is def a direct correlation not causation.
  16. Hi friend. Try manuka honey. I use it and it really helps me. You just apply it directly to the sore. It doesnt burn or sting but relieves the itching/burning and helps dry it out. You can research it but ive found it helpful and I know the feeling at each ob changing your mood but hopefully soon they will decrease in frequency. They say that it can be related to your period so dont know if thats why you get it monthly. A friend of mine also uses this thing called immunity plus. They are herbal drops you take daily. I never used it but she swears it helps her. Hope this helps.
  17. Sorry I meant its something you could be at risk for without* hsv anyway...
  18. Yea I read somewhere that there was a correlation between herpes and alzheimers disease but dont know how true it is. I decided not to research this because this is something we may have been at risk for without h anyway.
  19. Thank you ladies @forgivenessandpeace @peggy @miji69 feel free to message me at anytime @peggy and thanks so much for inviting me to do the same. Your story really shows that it could happen to anyone. Its be a rough month for me but I made it through and each day gets brighter. And yes its not worth it for me to be worth someone like that. Im so glad to have someone to confide in and you guys bc doesnt make me feel like he is only one who can be there for me through this. Thanks again everyone. Im going to try to stay positive as much as I can.
  20. @miji69 thanks so much. I really hope things go well with the new person in your life. I pray that if its meant to be and if he will treat you like the great person. You are that things will work out. I go back and forth about whether or not it was rape that night. I said no repeatedly and fought but then eventually I got tired and said okay. But you are right if someone says no even once that should be respected I think im blaming myself because instead of kicking him out or threatening to end things eventually I just said okay. Now I have to face the repercussions but you live and you learn. Im filled with regret, play the scenario in my head over and over again but everyday it does get easier. I think I need to just move on from him bc though in a twisted way I find comfort knowing he is going through what im going through he still doesnt see the big picture and im not sure hes an honest person furthermore whenever I talk to him im reminded of when he too advantage of me. I pray im able to forgive and move on but I will never forget. @nsgreenville thanks so much for your words of encouragement. You all are awesome and have helped me so much.
  21. Thank you @sil88. You're right. It could be much worse. I just have my moments. I guess im just angry bc I feel like my choice was taken away from me. It was taken away when my giver didnt respect my wishes. It was taken away when my givers doctor minimized what he had and it was taken away when he chose not to inform me. I will never do that to someone and will always disclose. Its so selfish not to. As soon as I found out my results I called and told him though we weren't even speaking and his response is yea I found out I had it a few days ago and experienced your symptoms before. Its just crazy. I guess we all think differently. But I am thankful it wasnt a worse diagnosis and symptoms can be treated. We will get through this. Im looking forward to getting past this emotional roller coaster more than anything else.
  22. Also sorry for some reason my username is misspelled.
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