Ihaveittoo1975

@positivelybeautiful In your post you say that having H1 will protect tc50 to some extent from catching H2. Somehow I must have missed that fact, despite reading quite a lot about the virus. I have just met someone who has H1 orally (I have H2), so I would appreciate if you cared to elaborate a bit on this. I do know that the two strains are quite similar in their DNA, but that's about all I know. By the way, she was really cool about it when I told her during our first (unplanned) make out session. Funny enough, I asked her if she knew anything about herpes. She said she didn't, but then went on to tell me that an ex boyfriend gave her H1 orally. I laughed a bit to myself, and then said "so then you are familiar with it after all". This all took place in Europe, where H is not that big of a deal.

@mandymoon No worries! I know it's easy to get wrapped in our own problems, and to be honest, the thinking of "someone else has it worse than you" really doesn't do me any good, so I definitely see where you are coming from. As far as my immune system, I really don't suspect there's anything wrong with it. Pre H I was rarely sick, maybe a cold or two a year, that's it. I really think is the past several months of a continuously high stress factor which has done me in. Things are now settling down slowly but surely, and hopefully my ob's will too.

@fitgirl I'm about eight months in since my dx. I started on daily 500mg Valtrex about six weeks ago. Initially all was quiet for about two weeks after going on AV, but then it flaired up again with non stop ob's. I would get one or two blisters, and as soon as they healed another fucker showed up. Kinda like H HAD to show its presence no matter what. The last few days things seems to have quietend down as far as new blisters, but I just know they will soon come back. I too live quite healthy, but unfortunately ob's from running has kept me away from exercising and physically pushing my body as much as I would like. I eat mostly healthy, but I also try to not deprive myself from everything which could potentiall bring on ob's. I have, and in some ways still am, been under lots of stress the last several months. Pretty much constantly thinking about H obviously does no good either. Maybe it will take a while for this long term stress to really exit my system. I am coming up on the final stretch as far as major changes in my life, hopefully that will lead to a more peaceful inner and in turn lessen my physical symptoms.

If it makes you feeling any better, try having basically constant obs. I would give my left nut to have a year between obs. Not to belittle how you feel right now, but it could have been so much worse for you.

Hmmmm. Two years is a long time to still be getting obs from sex I would think. Hopefully that was not the reason. Was the sex rough? Do you normally get frequent obs?

It's quite likely that the blisters formed after having sex due to the friction. Happens to me pretty much every time I have sex. Use of lots of lube and go slow can reduce the risk of an ob. If the sex did cause the ob, then your guy is probably ok. For how long have you had H? http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/5002/sex-as-trigger-for-herpes-outbreaks#latest

What did surprise me is that there is no mentioning of herpes what so ever, being as common as it is.

Not really a surprise I guess. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/05/26/std-rhode-island-hookup-apps-tinder-stds_n_7443090.html Rhode Island Blames STD Spike On Hookup Apps Like Tinder Sexually transmitted disease rates in Rhode Island rose sharply between 2013 and 2014, and the state's department of health is pointing to hookup apps like Tinder as one of the driving forces behind new outbreaks. The rise has been precipitous: Syphilis cases in Rhode Island increased by 79 percent between 2013 and 2014 while gonorrhea cases increased by 30 percent. Newly identified HIV cases increased by almost 33 percent, according to a new state report. The rates didn't affect all groups equally. Young people between the ages of 15 and 24 were more likely than any other group to be infected with chlamydia and gonorrhea. Men who have sex with other men made up 75 percent of primary and secondary syphilis cases, the two most infectious stages. While the Rhode Island Department of Health attributed some of the increase in STDs to better testing, the report also highlighted the role that high-risk sexual behaviors play in disease transmission: High-risk behaviors include using social media to arrange casual and often anonymous sexual encounters, having sex without a condom, having multiple sex partners, and having sex while under the influence of drugs or alcohol. "These new data underscore the importance of encouraging young people to begin talking to a doctor, nurse, or health educator about sexual health before becoming sexually active and especially after becoming sexually active," Rosemary Reilly-Chammat, an HIV/AIDS sexuality specialist with the Rhode Island Department of Education, said in a statement. Representatives at Tinder, a well-known hookup app that's reportedly been downloaded by some 50 million users around the globe, did not respond to a request for comment from The Huffington Post. But past studies had already highlighted a possible connection between social media hookups and sexually transmitted diseases. A 2013 New York University study linked Craigslist to a 16 percent increase in HIV cases between 1999 and 2008. "Individuals are inclined to discount the future value of staying STD/HIV free and put high value on the instant gratification that casual sex offers," the researchers wrote. Rising STD rates aren't unique to Rhode Island. Nationwide, syphilis cases increased by 10 percent between 2012 and 2013, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, though it's worth noting that nationwide cases of chlamydia and gonorrhea decreased slightly during the same period. Even curable STDs, such as syphilis and gonorrhea, can have long-term consequences for sexual health. Approximately 24,000 women in the United States are likely to become infertile each year because of undiagnosed STDs, which are a major cause of pelvic inflammatory disease. There are more deadly risks as well. According to the World Health Organization, being diagnosed with an STD is associated with a tripled risk of contracting HIV. Human papillomavirus, another sexually transmitted disease, causes 530,000 cervical cancer cases and 275,000 deaths worldwide each year. Mother-to-child STD transmissions carry additional risks for the baby, and can result in a host of health consequences, including stillbirth, neonatal death and birth defects. As always, the best practice here is safer sex. Get tested for STDs and HIV. Ask your partner(s) about their sexual health status. Use a condom every time you have sex, as birth control pills do not prevent STDs. If you are diagnosed with an STD, follow the instructions of your healthcare provider and don't engage in sexual activity until your doctor says it's safe to do so.

Very nice! Your last sentence is so true. Disclosure is scary for most folks, but the worst thing that can happen is getting a no. To me it's definitely worth the risk of rejection when disclosing if the person is worthy of you versus shying away from a relationship to begin with.

Another question. Do you guys think condoms lessens the friction, or makes it worse? Of course there would be more direct skin to skin rubbing, but maybe the "enclosement" with the condom irritates the skin too. I'm thinking of if I were to be with another H+ partner and transmitting was not an issue.

@sadpanda I did not take any meds for the first six months post dx, but since three weeks I have been taking Valtrex and I was really hoping it was going to take care of the post sex obs, but it apeears it did not. Due to the ensuing ob I have only had sex once while on meds, maybe it will be a while before it takes full effect. It pretty much stopped my continuous obs, but again, sexy times triggered it. As far as sensitivity goes, I did feel a heightened sensation during masturbation right after being diagnosed, but that has since subsided.

As much as she enjoys the other stuff we do, she definitely misses the intercourse too. Even when we have been able to have it post H it has been far from what it used to be. As I am so afraid that any kind of pace will trigger an ob I have a really hard time relaxing and enjoying the moment. Again, she is very patient and supportive, I just hate not being able to please her like I used to. Makes me feel less manly, which has never been an issue before. :(

I really do enjoy giving pleasure to my partner more than I need the pleasure myself, but for some reason I feel there is no real substitute for actual intercourse when it comes to feeling that intense connection. My current "lady" company enjoys when I use my imagination when intercourse is out of the question, and I thoroughly enjoy pleasing her, but it always feels as something is missing. I guess I am having a hard time adjusting to the fact that my sex life is forever changed. I now tend to shy away from any conversation involving sex, and it makes me "sad" to watch sex scenes in movies. I really, really miss my old sex life. Again, I would feel a million times better if having sex was not a trigger for me. Clinging to hope that it's only temporary is tough, I want to know. If I knew that in six months or a year things would be "normal" again it wouldn't really be an issue, but the uncertainty with H in regards to everything, makes it very difficult. It's gonna be a long process to adjust.

@wcsdancer2010 I sure do hope you are right about tings improving by time. I guess I just don't quite have the patience for it. I just want to get back to a as normal as possible sex life, any other triggers I can deal with. And honestly my concern is really not about myself, it's how it will affect a potential partner dealing with a "restricted" sex life. The thing about my symptoms is that I now rarely have any symptoms besides the blisters, especially not now after starting to take AV. I guess my body is really good at masking my other symptoms (i there any at all), which is weird since it still since very sensitive as far as getting obs. The discomfort in my lymph nodes, left leg and balls I used to feel have pretty much dissipated, even during an ob. This is obviously a good thing, and if I could only get the sex triggered obs under control my life would pretty much return to normal. Santa Claus, is that too much to ask for? I have been (mostly) a good boy. :)

While I too try to see it as "just an inconvenient skin condition" as well I neither can't necessarily fault someone wanting to protect their health. I am in no way suffering from any pain with my ob's (most guys don't it seems) but it does hinder me in a couple of ways which are quite annoying. I can't have sex as frequent and as long sessioins as I used to due to the friction, so even when I am blister free I am hesitant having sex as I pretty much know what's coming. The second thing I have to avoid is any cardiovascular exercise, like running. It seems to be a sure way for me to trigger a blister or two. Sex and exercise have been two pretty major ingredients in my pre H life. They are now both affected. I tend to be drawn to women, who like me, like to stay in shape. With the potential of them getting H from me and possibly experiencing the same changes to their lives I can see someone being hesitant. I understand the recurring issues I have been having the last few months are not the norm, and hopefully they will subside with time, but who am I to say to a potential partner that they will most likely not experience what I have been experiencing. In my mind they are taking a (calculated) risk by having sex with me. I can't take it for granted that every woman is willing to do that and, I have to respect those who don't.

For me alum didn't do anything, opening the sore or not, diluted or not. So far for me, tea tree seems to be the only topical treatment doing anything, but I will give lemon balm a try if I can find it.

Well, it happened again. After starting on AV a few weeks ago things had been going quite well with only one "bump" in the road in the past two weeks or so. I was finally clear to go and was anxious to see how well the AVs would work against after-sex ob's. Turns out, in my case, they didn't stop me from getting three blisters. This despite she being very wet, using lots of lube, going slow, on purpose keeping the intercourse short and popping a pill after the act as preventative measures. I was good thorough out the day (kept checking for any blisters) and it was until about 24 hrs later they all of a sudden appeared. Now, I did masturbate a couple of hours before they appeared and I did have half a dozen of tasty Krispy Kremes so I am hoping that the added friction from masturbating and the high amount of sugar may have been part of the problem. The good part is that after putting tee trea oil the sores and another AV pill it looks like they have started to heal up rather quickly. She really wanted to have sex again yesterday (so did I of course) so it was very disappointing having to tell her of what was going on. She is a very understanding and supporting woman and all she said was "well, I guess I will just have to kiss you and then fall asleep in your arms". I feel very fortunate to have someone this understanding and patient early on in my diagnosis, and we aren't even in a committed relationship. For those of you who have experienced ob's after sex, did it get any better with time? I'm seven months into this ordeal. I really don't have an issue with the fact that I have herpes and I am not particularly afraid of disclosing, but my concern is how this will affect my sex life going forward. Especially as I would like for the next woman I meet to be the mother of my children. I really don't see how we would even have a chance to conceive if I am to get an ob each and every time we have sex, especially as I am away from home six months out of the year. Doesn't leave a whole lot of chances getting someone pregnant and still protecting them from getting H. I know this sounds rather exteme, but has anyone ever heard of using artificial insemination in the case of herpes, solely trying to prevent transmitting it to a partner?

@sandpanda I keep reading about it, but have yet to try it. Not even sure it can be bought in Spain where I live. I will look for it when I get back in the country again.

@catwoman32 Unless H has stayed latent in you, it appears that your boyfriend is your giver based on that he had enough antibodies for it to show in a blood test. Normally it takes about four months for the antibodies to show in a bloodtest.

Way to go girl! Very strong of you to do this.

I have something similar too going on, just not for as long, only about five days. It's basically a small red spot, never had any liquid, was never open and has not been tender. I have put tea tree oil on it to dry to dry it out, but nothing happens. Normally there should be a small pin head sized scab on it by now, but nada. I can't say for sure it actually is H, which is the most frustrating part, but I feel like I know have to treat every little red dot as H to be on the safe side.

@sil88 That definitely crossed my thought. I have never had any of the flu symptoms since getting H though. It started right after I had breakfast, and since I had salmon and mackrill I suspect that might have caused it. Today my stomach was all messed up, but I'm doing better now. How long do your flu symptoms normally last? Are the symptoms normlly followed by an ob in your case?

Update: I am happy to report that Valtrex has done wonders for me. I have now taken it for two weeks, and from what I can tell, nothing. I did have a small red spot but it didn't develop into a blister, so I'm not sure it was H. I still do experience some discomfort in my left lymph node, and occasionally in my testicles, but it's much less than it used to be. Hopefully with time, even that will subside. Yesterday I caught some sort of bug and was bed bound all day yesterday with fever chills. I was afraid H would pop out again, but I took a second Valtrex and still nothing. I can definitely see how people with little to no symptoms forget they even have H. My mind has been a lot less on H now that I don't see the constant reminder down there. I really do feel for those who are struggling even when taking anti virals. I honestly don't know what I would have done had this not worked. Part of my success though I think is that my divorce is now finalized and I can finally put that stress behind me. I am anxiously waiting to hit the one year mark with H (October) to see if it actually subdues even further, as most say it normally does.

You will probably get a much better response from some other people here, but I felt I had to at least say nothing. First of all, you are better off without those two guys in your life. You will hear that from every person on this forum. Secondly, I think it might be a good idea to slow the dating down some. You have only had H for a couple of months, and although admirable that you were able to go back to dating so soon (many waits for YEARS before building up the courage to date) this might be a good time to focus on yourself for a while. I have a feeling that you maybe simply wanted to test the waters and see if guys would be ok with your status, and maybe not so much be in a relationship. I could of course be completely wrong about that. Unfortunately it back fired on you, which no one wants of course, especially it being your first two disclosures (not counting your friend). My advise to you, again, is to slow down the romantic side of your life for a little bit and get to know your "new" you. You didn't mention if you are experiencing any physical symptoms from H, but if you do focus on getting that under control. If no symptoms work on the mental part of your new life, a part which often is more difficult than the physical part. Spend more time with your accepting friend and use him as a sounding board. The best thing to get to grips with H is having someone to talk to. Obviously you have all of the experts on this forum too, they will be of great help to you no matter what you are going through. Also, to help you better in the future, it would be good for us to know which type of H you have. Stay strong and don't buy into the stigma. Only ignorants like those two guys do.

@stillmebutwiser, in my opinion you are 110% correct. I refuse to only search for a H+ woman. I'm worth just as much as any H- person, so why limit myself. Would it be more convenient if I did end up with an already infected woman? You bet! No worrying about having to disclose or infect her, but chanses are I made compromised and lowered my standards simply because I knew it would be easier. If you lower your standards and hang on to a partner "just because" I think you run a much bigger risk of ending up in a less healthy relationship, and it's much more likely to end sooner rather than later. You can try to tell (fool) yourself that you aren't settling, but your subconscious will always know that you did.