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KatieLilady

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Everything posted by KatieLilady

  1. Thanks for the kind words JingleBelle. Seriously, it means a lot.
  2. I'm so sorry you are going through this. I was just rejected also. It feels very isolating but you did the right thing. I'm here if you need someone to talk to.
  3. Just had my first disclosure conversation and was promptly rejected. This sucks. Some words of support would be greatly appreciated.
  4. I'm really struggling because my husband and I have been together for 6 years. While I was pregnant we discovered that he gave me genital HSV1. I have known for about a year now. I thought I was over being angry about it, but now I fear that I have gotten it in my mouth/gum area. I'm afraid to kiss my daughter. Not only that but because I know that my husband gave this to me, because he had all the antigens already and I had not (he had never gotten tested for any STD's and he's a nurse). I have no sexual feelings for my husband anymore. I resent that he doesn't get any symptoms and I do. I feel frustrated because he thinks it is my responsibility as his wife to please him in this area. I told him last night that he needs to find other means of sexual satisfaction, even if that means sleeping with someone else. The rest of our marriage is great. I think he took offense to my proposal, but what am I supposed to do? If I don't satisfy him and don't want to I don't feel like he should go without, and I don't feel like I should have to feel like I am not being true to myself by having sex with him. It makes me feel dirty or like a whore. Any thoughts, advice, or similar stories are appreciated. I'm at a bit of a loss. Thanks.
  5. Absolutely. You make a lot of good points!! I have already done a lot of education to everyone I can and feel comfortable with about herpes. I would love to make a difference. I know that some of this coping problem is also coming from my pregnancy hormone imbalance too. It is really nice to have the support of other people in my shoes. Thanks you guys!! ❤️
  6. I've worked in the hospital for a long time and was an RN. I'll have to admit that they taught us in nursing school there herpes can be contracted through a set of gloves so I always double gloved before when I had a patient with herpes. I've recently been diagnosed and have even gone so far as to wear gloves when I'm wiping during an outbreak. I know exactly how you feel, and just know that you're not alone. I haven't figured out exactly how to cope with this myself yet but I know that it will get easier over time. We're here for you!
  7. @FL: I was diagnosed with a new herpes infection per my blood work after I had an outbreak during my pregnancy. My husband who is a couple generations older than me, has never been tested for STDs ever. He's never had an OB before, so I don't know if it's oral or genital. My doc ordered blood draws on him and he tested positive for an old infection of HSV1. My problem is that I don't want to contract an oral herpes infection. He can't understand that I am associating sex with the pain of my herpes outbreak I think. I know that it's not fair and I love my husband a lot, but it's only been a month and I still don't know how to feel about my new sexual life. I don't think it is fair to feel responsible for his sexual satisfaction when he is the reason I am on this mess in the first place. We are both nurses and I have done everything I can to learn about this virus, but something inside of me feels less than adequate as a woman. I never realized the amount of value that society puts in a woman being sexually healthy. I told my husband he needs to educate himself about herpes and try to comprehend at least a little bit of what I am going through. It also probably doesn't Help that I can't drink, or really do any I the things that I usually would do to get my mind off things. Sex just makes it worse.
  8. I am currently 21 weeks pregnant. At 17 weeks I was diagnosed with a first outbreak of herpes that I contracted from my husband. It was absolutely miserable. At first I thought it must have been something that I picked up a long time ago, because my husband and I have been together for 6 years. Then I found out that it was a new outbreak. I got over the initial shock and luckily my first outbreak, and am now on maintenance anti vitals. I have never gone through anything so painful and uncomfortable (Insert "well good luck going through labor" jokes here). The problem is now that because my husband is an asymptomatic carrier, he doesn't understand how uncomfortable it is. I am associating the pleasure of sex with the pain of my outbreak and am terrified that if I have too rough of sex or even too messy that I will spread the virus and infection to other areas of my genitals or body! I don't know how to overcome this, or get over the fact that I got this from him. I had his blood tests done and he has an old infection of herpes simplex 1, which I can only assume is the same kind of virus I have. That being said, how can I ever have oral sex again? The last thing I want is to get this anywhere else on my body. I am so mad at my husband, because he has never even bothered to get an std test (I think it is a generational thing). How am I supposed to get over this and enjoy my sex life again? I'm so confused, mad, and scared. I feel like I should put my own vagina on quarantine. Has anyone tried sex therapy, did it help? I am trying to be as open and talk about the disease with as many people close to me as I can so that I don't feel so isolated. I don't think it is fair that even my husband who I got this from doesn't understand what it feels like. Anyways, just trying not to feel so alone.
  9. As a nurse that was just diagnosed with herpes, I would like to put a disclaimer in here about using echinacea on a regular basis. If you use it intermittently, it will boost your immune system. It is my understanding however that you don't want to take it everyday because your body does not recognize the need to produce the parts of your immune system that it usually helps boost. Hope this helps.
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