risingsun

Some background info: I have had hsv2 for 6 years. Outbreaks happen maybe anywhere from 3-6 times a year and I don’t take acyclovir suppressively now but I had at one time. Now I take it only when an outbreak occurs. Was diagnosed with Graves’ disease (hyperactive thyroid) 6 months ago. I’ve had a nagging suspicion hsv2 has something to do with it as herpes of different types can bring it on. Although the internet is not specific about hsv2, I wonder if it was triggered by it. No one else in my family has a thyroid disease. So my question is sort of a poll. Anyone else have a thyroid condition post hsv diagnosis? Or even other conditions? Curious to know your story.

I'm curious and I'm sorry if someone posted this topic before but I searched and came up with different results. Aside from disclosing to a potential sexual partner, how many people in your lives have you told? Family, close friends, etc for the main purpose of having a support system? I've revealed this to two of my closest friends and my mother. I have other friends who will probe about my dating life and little do they know that it's rather complicated now. That potential dates may not be rejecting me because of other things but of a health concern. What do you say in a situation like that? There are times I feel it would be liberating to say but other times not so much. Of course there is no pressure to reveal to friends like it is with a partner or potential partner.

@WCSDancer2010 Thank you so much! I have gone through the ebook extensively but am actually too chicken to forward him all this before I get a chance to talk to him in person... just because it will point him here and I'm on here airing my situation, though anonymously... is that normal to feel that way? I do feel like this information will help me to communicate to him verbally though. But that is if this talk does happen. So the update is that he agreed to meet yesterday but in the nth hour, he said he couldn't make it and apologized. He was with a friend catching up prior and couldn't get away to meet. I'm disappointed and the anxiety has gone back up a bit. He said some encouraging things Friday through text but yesterday's plan to talk falling through has put me back where I started emotionally. He mentioned that we would reschedule and I last left it to him to let me know his availability. I'm doing my best to give him the benefit of the doubt... at this point, I simply don't know what he is thinking. He has not communicated his feelings other than being torn and that we needed to talk about it. Thoughts?

@Corissa, I feel similarly. Meeting someone new, it's like you're counting down when to reveal. I revealed on the fifth time. Things were becoming intense to the point where I had to say something or I wouldn't feel good about going further. It hurts a little the change in demeanor of the guy I disclosed it to and he is currently thinking it through. But beyond this point without telling him, I started to feel like it would become like false advertising. First date, definitely too early. Just depending on the pace of the courtship.

@CityofAngels, thank you so much! I too always thought adults knew how to handle the situation and were, well adults about it! This is my second time disclosing to someone after contracting HSV2. But he faded out supposedly on a different premise - not having his life together! So immature and disrespectful. And the ex - the one who possibly could've given it to me.. same way.. faded out. But I'm past the point of blaming. I have it now and that's what I have to deal with. Believe me, I would've loved to have texted him today to check in. But I didn't. Instead, I finally told my mother about this, which I held back from her since my last relationship. It was kind of cathartic. Almost. But I felt a little better having her support and being on my side.

If he ultimately accepts or not accepts, I would respect it. It would not make him a bad person either way. I think if it is whether he practices due diligence in handling the talk that may reflect to a degree how good or bad he is at handling the bad stuff in life. Giving me the time and space as I've given him the time and space to think things through is important to me and may reveal to me his character. Disclosing is so draining and so it's just really harsh for the person receiving the disclosure to just fade out and be wishy-washy in return. If he knew very little about this like he said, it's probably a 7-8 to him at the outset of the disclosure. I really hope he spent some time becoming informed... YES, I need to bring information. Thank You. I'm editing this post seeing yours threelittlebird. @threelittlebirds Big hugs too. I've been reading your other post about it! Like FL said, this talk should happen this weekend as he had proposed. If it doesn't, well... I have my answer I think.

That is true and I understand that. It's been so heart wrenching. Ugh. Waiting and waiting. It's all I can do. You have good perspective on it FL.. this proves whether they can handle good times and the bad. Hugs to you. I would like to have answers straight away too. But know he needs space to process.

I am so glad there is a place like this. I've come to this place to gain from others' trials and tribulations. Now I've come across my own. I'm sick with anxiety and didn't sleep last night. I told the guy I've been seeing for a few weeks that I have hsv 2. Great chemistry, great attraction that I had not experienced with anyone in a long time. But he started taking things faster. By the last time, it got hot and heavy. So I broke down and told him before anything could happen. He was calm and listened. Said he did not know much about it and so I gave him the basics. He continued to be affectionate and a little while later, I left in an awkward manner. The next day, his demeanor was almost 180 through text. Not quite the same pre-disclosure. And then finally said he was torn about what I told him and just needed time to think. I said I understood and because I liked him a lot, I felt I had to tell him. Was it too soon? We'd seen each other about 5x. I said we could openly talk about this and he agreed and offered to do so this weekend. My fear is he will flake or just humor me in doing the talk only to say thanks but no thanks. He said he cared that I'm in his life and that we met. I'm preparing for the worst. It's difficult to stomach the change in his demeanor. Short of asking you all to mind read, what is anyone's thoughts on this? Do you think it will go one way or another? Anyone in the same exact boat? This horrid waiting period?