Lori

I like what you said about herpes being basically a skin condition. If I ever have to do the talk again (I currently have a boyfriend now) but if I was in the situation of getting intimate with a new partner and the time arrived that I had to let him know about the herpes I would start off by saying that I have a skin condition before actually letting him know that the skin condition is herpes. I have had to tell previous bf’s in the past that I had herpes and when I told them that I have genital herpes … the look on their faces said it all: “fear”… and I understand that because of what I was taught at an early age in school about STDs. If you say you have a skin condition then the person you are telling will see that you aren’t ashamed but merely letting them know the facts so that they can use protection. I always found it awkward to say that I have “genital herpes”… it just sounds worse than what it is. My current boyfriend (of 9 months) was shocked when I told him and it took him awhile to not be paranoid that he was going to get it. Now he has even admitted a few weeks ago that he was so afraid of getting it…I thought he was over reacting and I was constantly having to reassure him he wasn’t going to get it but at the same time I let him know that there is a slight chance you can get it even if you do use protection. He was insensitive to my feelings and the way he acted made me feel as though there was something wrong with me or that I was defective. I didn’t feel like anything was wrong with me at all. I’m not perfect but the herpes is the least of my imperfections.

I loved that you said when you were in your 20′s that you spoke of your herpes freely! … How refreshing… because really you were acting normal and not ashamed. If we all were able to talk so freely then it wouldn’t be such a big secret… meanwhile so many people have it and most people (in the U.S. anyway) are to afraid to talk about it because std/herpes = sexually promiscuous or slut or loose… meanwhile anyone can get it and herpes does not equal bad - it just means that we have a virus. Ahhh and yes … so good to have a sense of humor about it.

Hi!!! Great site! Great videos! I have had genital herpes since April 2008. I have actually adjusted pretty well with support in the beginning. I have been seeking out more support currently because I just had another sore recently and just actually don't like being reminded that I have it. I take suppressive meds but still my body struggles with keeping the virus quiet. lol… anyway, I know that I am a more compassionate person since getting hsv2 and that if I met someone who had it before I actually had it I might not have understood…. Now, I just look at it as a silly virus that affects my private area (lol again)… So, I think i will continue to make light of it. I have always told my bf’s before ever getting intimate with them that I have the virus because its the right thing to do and also I wouldn’t want someone to infect me because they were too ashamed to be open. Thanks again for your words of wisdom!