LotusBud

@Blondie1982 You go, girl! Great words of encouragement. I'm copying the part of your story where you dealt with the H joke, in case I need it 😃

Hi @Ice2423 Glad you're feeling better! Everything I've been reading about people's experiences with the IgG and the IgM makes me question them. I recently saw a YouTube where the doctor was explaining that H creeps along under the radar of the immune system in such a way that the immune system doesn't necessarily react. Not to burst any bubbles, but H can be asymptomatic for years. I think I would still get the Western Blot done just to be on the safe side. Good luck!!!

@PinsNeedle Oh, I read on another thread that B- complex is supposed to help with nerve stuff too. Haven't tried that yet.

Hi @PinsNeedle Currently going thru some nerve wackiness so I sympathize! Haven't experienced what you are, but have had trouble getting to sleep because of nerve irritation. 3 months seems like a long time to have it tho. What are you doing for yourself? Also, have you checked out other possibilities? I ask that because going to sleep w/o nerve irritation and waking up with it seems odd since your body is rested and hopefully less stressed. Maybe sleeping funny or out of alignment or combo? When my lysine and lemon balm aren't working fast enough and/or the nerve pain/weirdness passes what I will tolerate, I'll take naproxen or ibuprofen. Not too much or too often because they upset my stomach. I can also recommend a topical salve with cbd oil. I just tried this for the first time the other day. I was impressed with how fast it worked. Good luck!!!

Hi @Next step I would say that it took a few months for me to get thru the grief stages. I was lucky in that I was in a long-term relationship with the guy who gave it to me so didn't have to deal too much with thoughts of rejection, etc. while trying to come to grips with the physical reality of H. I imagine it might take longer if you have to deal with both at the same time. I've come to realize that I am still the same person... worthy of love and a great life. My partner passed away unexpectedly 18 months ago and now I'm starting to look around. So far I've disclosed once (via text) to what could have been a casual hook up. He didn't really want to play after that, no hard feelings. I wasn't attached so it was pretty easy. And I discovered what a good filter H can be. If the person isn't willing to make the effort, to put the energy into making things work, then that person isn't for me. I haven't tried them yet, but was thinking about checking out the H dating sites. I just hope they are better than the regular ones. 🤤 Maybe put thoughts of relationships on the back burner for a few months while you get the hang of having H as part of your life. You don't need that stress atm. Once you've regained your equilibrium, then go for it! When some of my other single female friends and I get together (all in our 40s and 50s), we frequently end up talking about guys and wondering where are the good ones. IMO, H has very little to do with finding a decent guy. It might add a challenge, but self - confidence seems to overcome a lot of drawbacks. Good Luck!!!

You go! @22&Depressed

Hi @unbreakable You don't say what flavor of hsv you have. If it's hsv2, you may have more outbreaks simply because you are a woman. hsv2 finds warm, moist environments more congenial. It's why the transmission rate from male to female is 14%, but female to male is 4% (unprotected, no meds.) I was with my partner for 3 years after he gave me hsv2. I didn't notice that sex brought on an outbreak for either of us. I would think it's very possible tho, just because the skin its thin and sensitive in the genital area. Good luck!

@Poppyheart Re - reading your post and wondering what kind of tests did your doctor do? Did you get a full STI panel including for HSV? Did she do a swab test on the lesions? Everyone is different in how they respond to the virus of course, but "peeing fire" could also be a bad urinary tract infection (UTI). That's the only time I've felt pain that intensely when peeing. Might want to get it checked out. You could have both at the same time, but not be able to tell because you never had H before. Just concerned for you. Feel better soon!

Hi @Poppyheart and @Sunflowergirl Hmm, lots of beautiful flowers on this forum. Well, ladies I don't think either of you said whether you have HSV1 or 2 or both. I know the first OB is hellish physically and emotionally. My heartfelt sympathies!!!💞💞💞 Here's something I've posted a few times for those new to H. Hope it's helpful. BTW, re: oral during outbreak, it's pretty big risk because you could be shedding the virus from any part of you, not just from your genital region although it's more concentrated there. "I’m a female and was diagnosed with hsv2 about 4 years ago. My first outbreaks seemed continuous for over 3 months even after taking the antiviral meds. One lesion would appear, get almost all cleared up when 2 new ones would appear about a quarter inch away. Docs were baffled that it didn't respond to meds, but I have since read that there are resistant strains. My partner who gave me H said the meds didn't work on him either. I researched and dug around focusing mainly on natural treatments and on the fact that the virus is a living organism that responds to its environment. There are 3 main things that have been useful to me and what I do to prevent outbreaks. 1. I learned that HSV2 prefers a warmer, moister environment than HSV1. This explains the locations where the viral outbreaks "usually" occur (i.e. warm, moist genitals for HSV2.) 2. Both HSV1 & 2, as well as herpes zoster (aka chicken pox/shingles) like to hang out in the nervous system when not active. HSV2 likes the base of the spine particularly, so prodrome often shows up as low back ache or nerve pain down the leg. 3. HSV likes the amino acid arginine, but not lysine. My self care routine specifically for HSV2 (not including general health maintenance like exercise) goes something like this: For active outbreak, make the environment as UNHEALTHY FOR THE VIRUS as possible. Keep the area as dry and cool as possible. (This is also soothing for painful lesions.) Sit on a gel ice pack; sleep with it over the affected area. Put a cloth between pack and skin; just needs to be cooler not frozen. Let a fan blow on the affected area for about a half hour as many times a day as you can stand it. This cools and dries. Watch a comedy on video while you wait. It goes with the ridiculous position you might find yourself assuming in order to fan the area. (Some recommend hair dryers, but they tend to blow warm air. That would probably be okay for HSV1) During work when you can't do any of the above, place small pad of folded up toilet paper over the lesions (I'm assuming they're in the genital area) so that it stays dry and isn't contacting any other moist areas. Change every time you go to restroom. Get lots of sleep especially for active outbreak and prodrome. I drink Nighty Night herbal tea by Traditional Medicinals if worrying prevents me from sleeping. (This is what works for me; not an endorsement.) I avoid high arginine foods. Unfortunately, this means chocolate. In retrospect, i wonder if my first outbreak went on so long because i was eating so much of my favorite comfort food. Nothing will bring on an outbreak for me faster than eating chocolate 3-4 days in a row. You might have different food triggers. You'll have to pay attention to see if there are any connections I take 3000 mg of lysine 3 times per day during OB and prodrome. 3000mg daily for maintenance. Lysine counters arginine so if I forget and indulge in too much chocolate, then I'll take extra lysine. For my nervous system, I take lemon balm in capsule form (1600mg daily; times 3 during OB or prodrome. ) Lemon balm has traditionally been used as a nerve tonic. I've tried other herbs like Olive leaf extract. You'll have to see what works for you. For me, lemon balm seems to help with any nerve pain weirdness that might crop up. An ice pack on low back helps too. And because I find the nerve sensations annoyingly exhausting, as well as painful, I'll take naproxen (Aleve) to take down the inflammation. Also I just discovered (8/29/18) that a salve with CBD oil rubbed on the areas with nerve pain weirdness really, really helps. (Not an endorsement, just info: I'm using a brand called Receptra Targeted Topical. The guy at the store said it has the highest concentration of CBD oil in a salve. I originally got it for some joint issues I was having.) Avoid stressing your system. Yes, manage the usual stress, but also be diligent about taking care of yourself. For example, if you have allergies, take your meds and avoid allergens. Your body doesn't need to fight allergies AND herpes. Nowadays, my outbreaks, when I have them, last 7-10 days tops following this protocol. I'm not sure how often I have them anymore; it's become such a non-issue. I can usually pinpoint something I've done like eat chocolate that brought it on. I can also catch it during prodrome and stop a full outbreak from happening. Good luck, ladies!

@Next step "I really need to hear how life will be sweeter, please send some kind words" Here ya go! This is a very nice thread; you can read the ups and downs. What I got from it, is that after the initial shock and grieving, however long that takes; it's all about attitude and perspective. I'm 55 and 4 years in with H2. I've got the rest of my life to live and I'm not going to let it be dictated by a microscopic virus. There are rugs to be cut, art to be made, people to love and hug, and even a worthy few to have sex with. In all, there is too much fun to be had, despite a little rain on the parade!!!

Hi @hHelp I also have hsv2, not hsv1. I've had tingling, numbness and itching, but no sores on my lower lip a few times. It's annoying, but I figure it's more the virus messing with my nerves, than a new point of outbreak. HSV2 doesn't really like the mouth area; it's not the best environment for it to thrive. Good luck!!

Hi @Emmie17 Sorry, don't know what your outbreak might be. From the pic, your skin looks pretty normal. Have you gone to the doctor? If you think it's hsv, then they might be able to swab test it to confirm or let you know what it really is. If it's not hsv, it might be that your immune system is so busy fighting the virus that it can't handle much more. Other things like allergies/hives can now get around your system and manifest symptoms that you never had before. I know if I have dairy now that I have hsv, I will get itchy, hive-like bumps that appear and disappear at random. I was sensitive to dairy before; it would give me eczema if I had too much, but the hive thing was new. It took a minute to put it together that dairy was the direct cause not hsv. Some things to think about... Good luck!!

@Lilly82 Try this thread for your discouragement. Good luck!

@22&Depressed Glad to help in some small way. Give yourself time. What is it--the 5 stages of grief --denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance-- not necessarily in that order and with no fixed schedule? You are hurting; be gentle with yourself. You'll move thru this and come out stronger in the other side (says the voice of experience.) Life will be even sweeter than before. Here's one of my favorite quotes: "Life's not about waiting for the storm to pass; it's about learning to dance in the rain. " (Okay, it just may be a fave quote cuz I like to dance in the rain, but I live in Hawaii so it's no hardship.) 🦄🐫😊

22&Depressed Whew, not the very best news, but one less thing to stew over! Now it's "just" education, management, and when you are ready, disclosing. I don't know if it is too much on the bright side cuz that's my understanding of HSV1/HSV2 location preference as well. @Ishmael has given you loads of info. (Gonna have to check it out myself.) My only tip would be to avoid high arginine foods and add high lysine foods or maybe even a lysine supplement. Might be good for the whole family lol. I'm sure they would appreciate fewer cold sores. I tried to put a link to a food list, but that stopped my post. Just search: lysine arginine ratio foods list. Big Hugs!!!