voodoochild227

Thanks @WCSDancer2010, for everything!

Thanks guys, that takes a load off. I've been with this guy for a little over a month, we talked a little before we met face to face. I thought about not meeting him when I found out my diagnosis. I've only pecked him on the lips and was afraid to do that. He has tried to kiss me and I keep avoiding it. @2legit2Quit-funny you mention that because now when I'm watching TV and see people kissing, the first thing that pops in my head is "I wonder if they have HSV1". Never crossed my mind before. I never thought to ask anyone before kissing, ever. Now it's all I think about.

I'm sorry you are in this situation. He sounds like a "walking disease". Count your blessings that you are done with him. You have HSV, he is an asshole. Guess which one I'd choose?

I've never had a sore anywhere. I had a really bad yeast infection a couple months ago, the first in about 15 year. It was so bad that I went to the doctor for it, got swabbed and she didn't see any STDs. My college boyfriend gave me crabs when I was 21, other than that I've never had an STD, which is very surprising. I'm trying to figure out where viral shedding would happen. I've been on Valtrex for a week now, even though my doc told me I didn't need it. I'm still really anxious and don't want to give it to anyone. I don't want to be the cause of anyone having to have to go through this. HSV gives many questions and so few answers. I wish I'd kept a diary all these years.

Is it possible to have both HSV 1 & 2 genitally and not orally?

Thanks for the advice. It's so true. I've been in the first group many times. But there were times when the sex was terrible and I still held on because it was a warm body. I have tried to tell my new guy a few times and something always come up and when we get back to it I've lost the nerve. I've taken this as a sign. I've I initiated hypothetical talk, kind of skirting around the facts, and it seems like he would be accepting. I've asked him to get tested and he has, we are waiting on the results. I wanted both of us to know what we were getting into, which is more for his benefit not mine because I know what I'm bringing to the table. I think I'll be able to tell him within the next couple weeks. What do I do about kissing? I love, love, love deep tongue kissing and now I feel like I can't do it anymore. The same with oral, giving and receiving. I feel like I've lost so much. To my knowledge, I've never had an outbreak, so timing is kind of hard for me. I started taking Valtrex 2 days ago. My GYN said I didn't have to because I've never had an OB, but I decided to do so to protect my hopefully future partner. Thanks again.

I called my doctor's office and got the actual lab values. An IgG was drawn. HSV 1 was 34.20 and HSV 2 was 23.63.

I've recently started dating and asked my GYN to test me for everything. I thought I was tested 2 years ago for everything but my PCP only tested me for syphillis and HIV. My GYN did a blood test, HSV select I think, and said one of my values was 23. I don't know if it was for HSV 1 or 2. Does such a high number mean I've had it a long time? I'm still in denial somewhat and want to be retested by my PCP just to be sure. I don't want to infect anyone but very much want to be in a relationship again. I don't feel comfortable telling friends or family about this and don't think I ever will. I don't even want to list it on medical questionnaires. I've never had symptoms but worry that I may have and they were so mild that I didn't notice. And if that's the case, I wouldn't know when I should abstain from sex. I've wracked my brain trying to think of symptoms I may have missed, so far I've got nothing. It's very scary.

You all have given me hope. I've only been diagnosed since 8/5 of this year with H 1 & 2. I'm hoping the guy I'm now dating will accept me unconditionally when I tell him. What H has taught me is to wait and get to know people. I always knew I should wait and wanted to wait, but didn't want to disappoint, seem like a tease, or have them leave. I just didn't want to be alone. Once sex got involved, it was hard for me to let go even when I knew the guy was no good for me. There were times that I had condoms but because the guy didn't want to use them, we didn't. I could kick myself for that now. I also have a very healthy sex drive. I've told my current guy that I'm not ready (haven't disclosed the reason why) but he is cool with it and isn't pressuring me. I wish I'd known this would work a long time ago. Also, he is someone I probably wouldn't have dated before. I am now looking much deeper and into a person's character. @serendipity515 you are very fortunate because it took me a couple decades more than you to realize that I have more to offer than a sparkly vajayjay. How long should the wait be after meeting someone? What has worked for all of you ladies?

Any groups in SC?

I'm a 43 year old female, diagnosed with 1 & 2 a few weeks ago. I'm still reeling from the news. I need someone to talk to and haven't told anyone about my diagnosis except my recent partner. He hasn't gotten his results yet so I don't know who gave it to me. From a health standpoint, I've accepted it and I'm grateful it's nothing worse. A friend died of cancer the week I got my diagnosis, so I consider myself blessed. I am newly separated and just got up the nerve to start dating and this happened. I feel like crawling under a rock. I had profiles on a couple dating websites and took them down because I didn't feel it was worth it. I did start talking to a guy before I did that and I really like him and the feeling is mutual but I am afraid to tell him. I want to wait a couple months to let him get to know me, hoping that he would care enough for me to see past it. On the other hand, every time I'm with him or we talk I feel like I'm deceiving him. We've only been dating a few weeks but he is so different from other guys I've dated and I want it to work out. We haven't had sex and I've only given him a peck on the lips. Should I tell him now or continue to wait? If the answer is wait, how long? If it's tell him, what do I say? I've never had an outbreak and only asked my GYN to test me since I was dating again. I was very surprised by the results. I don't know if I can give or receive oral, or even kiss since I've never had an OB. I read about viral shedding but don't really understand it all. Since I haven't had an OB, I don't know where I shed. My doctor prescribed Valtrex only because I insisted but I haven't taken it yet. I probably will if my guy sticks around after I tell him. I feel like my personal life is over. I've read posts from members and it seems as if women are more accepting of their partner having H than men. I had a discussion with a friend a week before I was diagnosed about H, which was quite ironic. He asked if I would date someone with H and I told him I would because it would be silly to give up on a great guy just because he has H. (Now I wonder if he was trying to tell me that he has it). I've had a lot of bad guys in my life and if I found Mr. Right, it wouldn't matter what he has as long as he respects and loves me, and makes me feel secure. I worry that the men don't feel the same way.

I'm a 43 year old female in SC, diagnosed a few weeks ago. I've only told my recent partner, he hasn't gotten his results yet. I would like someone to talk to as I have many questions and just want to vent without being judged. I'm sort of okay with the diagnosis because it could have been worse. I am new to the dating scene and having trouble with disclosure and how to proceed with dating now that I have this.