Bambina3

You are rolling the dice without protection and antiviral therapy—I’ve had it for 30 plus years(decades before knowing) and I’m not aware of transmitting to anyone.

Don’t settle, if he said indefinitely I’d remain friends and look to move on, treasure what you have, nourish it, maybe it will grow once he’s educated on the subject..in the meantime don’t hold up your life. Keep trucking you deserve it 😀

Trust me, after my diagnosis and probably the next year or so, I was on an awful roller coaster—it does get better. Hugs !!

I’m not going to sit here and analyze this, and neither should you. If your heart feels you need to have further conversation with him, then do it. If not, move forward and if the situation presents itself again, just tell him. Really, don’t waste time worrying, enjoy life.

It’s scary because of the stigma the pharmaceutical companies labeled it with. It may be uncomfortable but it’s not deadly. Trust me, I was in your shoes so scared to disclose, I let it define me, until I finally came to peace with it (had 1 and 2 approx 30 years)...those that know and stay are worth far more than those that leave...you Deserve the best and the right person will accept you for YOU.

Ave you been tested for h1 and 2? Does your boyfriend know? If so, he’s taking the risks with you. You can have 1 break out in the vagina area as well as your mouth. I have both 1 and 2 for approx 30 years. Sorry, I saw your help title and wanted to make sure someone responded.

Did you have sexual intercourse? No, then you didn’t do anything wrong. Be kind to yourself.

Oh no I’m sorry, I meant prior to any sexual contact

Hi dis, First, I regretfully have to agree with everything your saying and feeling...it is pretty dam shitty...did he know he had it prior?? Is it possible he didn’t know? (Not giving him any benefit here)....are you sure he has it and not just you?? I know, tricky question BUT we can have H for centuries without knowing. I am one of “those” that had an initial outbreak that was diagnosed incorrectly, I then went 20 plus years until a breakout that brought me to a doctor, cultured, diagnosed. Do you know how many people I could of infected? I’ve had many many partners (not proudly), and several marriages later (ugh) kids? Special needs kids? Well, I have one also, at times I want to hide never mind someone else new...I have 3 children total...and thru my years, I never once had a problem dating...even with my package. I did not know of H then, but now...if you just wait until you’re closely bonded with someone before you disclose (prior to sex they advise).....I don’t see an issue...by then they are emotionally attached to you. Good luck...focus on your child, love WILL find you ❤️

Not sure if it’s texhnixally behind my back or considered gossiping because she discusses things with her nurse, or another co worker. This, is not uncommon. I would hope it doesn’t go any further than that because we are protected by the HIPPA Law.

Anyone else have an awkward moment they would like to share??? Now I can laugh at these moments So, I work for a healthcare facility, where everyone knows everyone...when I was diagnosed, the same got sent to our lab(I was not expecting an h diagnosis)....now it’s a permanent part of my chart... My primary care dr, find out, she has a lot to say about her patients behind their back (my niece interned for her)...but she’s good, so I go there. Today she did my pap,..I could only imagine the chatter after seeing I have an STD...it is not prevalent around here, and I don’t fit their typical stereotype. i leave the office with my head up, a giggle inside, this is me, deal with it, it’s your job 😉

Hsv is tricky and sneaky. As stated above, just because you have it, doesn’t mean you have transmitted it. Before I officially knew my status and knocked my brain to see how long I had it, I also went unprotected in some of my longer time relationships and did not transmit.

Thank you for sharing...I’ve had hsv1 and 2 for decades....it is what we make of it 😉

You will have sex again, you will be fine,..I know...I was in your shoes once, totally freaking the f””k out,,,and several members here helped me back then. I’m hsv1 and 2 positive for decades.

Oops nice to meet you seastar

Not possible to transmit that way

You are in a spot I was once, sick with worry. H1 can present in the same area h2 can present. I have read after 4 months a h1 and 2 test results are accurate

Glad you found us for support!! Yes, it can be tricky, and you can have it for centuries and not know...I did too. Your not alone.

Misinformation, stigma, we have all been there. You are beautiful, don’t let anyone tell you different !! Hugs!!

Yes!!! So glad to read this success story...i also disclosed once thru text, anonymously. I head shake thinking of it...it was back before my life went tipsy turvey (to put it mildly) and I was afraid of even discussing it....I just said “you were with me in your recent past and I have hsv2”...he replied “who is this”...I replied I couldn’t reveal. I sent the text...and we spoke again several times after that, and he never mentioned getting the text.....player??? Freaked out?? I have no clue

I don’t know if I totally agree with all the above responses... You failed, you made a mistake, move on. I don’t think going back is necessary if he was a one night stand, and he was just at much failing to ask about your std status. Sadly even when asked people lie to avoid stigma, at least you are not one of them. If you’re seeing him again, absolutely disclose. I say move on...consider it a lesson. If he caught it, he just got his lesson too. I know this isn’t a popular response so I’ll excuse myself now

It will be fine, please sss your dr for meds, I was on them when I was officially diagnosed and it helped tremendously

I would prompt her to get a blood test immediately, an IGg antibody....blood tests take 3 to 6 months to turn positive...once positive, positive is positive...you cannot determine when infection occurred...so if someone tests negatives, goes back in 6 months later and tests positive, you know it’s a recent infection. Now, let’s back up the choo choo to our virus. It’s tricky. You may have been the carrier all these years and didn’t know it, or visa Vera for your wife. I have had h 1 and 2 for at least 30 plus years....(I’m 51)...i went minimum 28 years without a single breakout that would even alert me to get tested and I’ve had 3 natural born children. One day what I thought was a uti infection lead my dr to exam, test, and diagnosis me. Racking my brain how could this be when I was diagnosed, I remembered being in the er in unbearable pain back when I was 18. When I called for my old records, it stated “peri anal ulcers”...aka h2. I was so horrified and it prompted me to join this site. My husband tragically passed away, I think I infected him too. Bottom line, all those years, no symptoms, no outbreaks, nothing, no official diagnosis, and I have no idea who I could of infected thru the years. I’d approach it lightly, placing no blame, and ask her to test. It Sure might be rough, may have mud slinging going on...trust me, I know, I lived in the closet of fear myself. I still do not openly discuss my diagnosis. Good luck

I am 50, and went 30 plus year without a single symptom or outbreak and I am positive for both 1 and 2. Like yourself, I tragically lost my husband..that’s why I have hardly been here....I am not concerned about my status turning someone away...in the beginning, when this became a reality for me, I was beyond devastated and wouldn’t tell anyone.

I haven’t been on here for a long time, I tragically lost my husband...I’ve become reclusive, and reflecting on my past behaviors. Although you don’t have to engage in high risk behavior to get hsv1 or 2...I know that. But with all my stress, and crying almost daily for the past 2 months, I thought for sure I would have a breakout...notta, nothing, nothing I’m aware of. So I’m stumped, no rhyme, no reason, it just comes whoever the hell it feels like,..10 days later or 30 years later, who knows. Peace to all xo