Saliha

HI! Welcome! I hear you and your story, the same happened to me. I haven't been on forever, it seems, but if it makes you feel any better we were all there once. Alone, scared and upset those 1st months. It's been 2 years for me now and it's really no biggie. It's a blessing to screen out those worth dating. I was 37 when I got mine from a guy who also tried using it against me on the break up, which was un-related to H. He said I would never find anyone else to accept me and guess what!? The next guy did and was awesome and seeing him ever since with no issues at all. It's an issue only if you make it one. I wish you the best and use this site a lot to learn more, it sure does help!

Hey! Adrial is right...things get better and it steps up your dating game in finding someone who is interested in all of YOU, not just sex. Just read my latest post on my recent dating story...lol. :) It does change things up, but that can definitely be for the better it you change how you look at it. H does not define you... you are who you present yourself to be and I think over time and with practice it will get easier to make it sound less shameful once you own it and your body and your personality...all of lovely you! Regardless of H or not, you are worthy and worth it! Don't forget that! Good luck! It'll be ok!

wow...not sure what to tell you, other than I can empathize with you that it would suck not knowing what the heck is going on. I thought the blood test could tell what strain you have? Can they do it again? I too have some weird symptoms and reactions often. I break out with a rash and itch all the time down there, but not really blisters and it can come and go just like that. My Docs don't think it is a H outbreak, but it is def something related...blisters or not...I am always itchy...not in other places like you though, so that would be annoying. I didn't think it could affect those areas. I would get another opinion if I were you...maybe your body just needs some more time to settle down. Do you take daily anti-virals? Does an anti-histimine or itch cream help or work? Just throwing ideas out there...good luck!

So just a quick story and thank you to H and an OB that saved me some time and heartbreak for those of you needing some positives with this. I have had H2 almost a year now and my first and only disclosure went fine. This guy and I were together for 6 months and intimate and he never once made me feel bad about it. But then he moved across the country and we decided to date others. I was of course terrified of starting over and dating again and disclosing again...ugh! SO...I met this really cool guy and we were texting a lot and saw each other a few times and I could tell he wanted to be intimate, but I just couldn't bring myself to tell him yet, because I didn't know him well enough or trust him. I told him I was not looking to just fool around, but for a relationship and that I didn't want to just jump into sex because that always seems to ruin things and I wanted to start things off right, etc. He seemed ok with this, but then one night I stayed there and continued to stand my ground on this and for his own good...lol...I was in the middle of a small OB. Well, still not feeling like he was someone I could disclose to, we just made out and then I made things stop for many reasons. Well, thank goodness I did, because the next day he said he couldn't believe I had been mean to him and denied him sex and that he felt rejected, etc. and that was a turn off to him! My goodness I had only know him a month and I guess his true colors were coming out...if he only knew the real reason was not only my morals that were not matching his, but also that I was protecting him. So of course I didn't disclose and even after apologizing for not having sex (which I should not have had to do!) I of course never have heard from him since! What a jerk! What irritates me even more is that he was trying to initiate sex without even talking about STI's or having a condom...some people really need to be more careful and not just assume. Lucky for him I knew and was able to put on the brakes, but just saying that having H really helps you to have self-control to do this and takes things to another level some others may not ever possibly reach. So it sucks I had this experience, but glad I did, because it just makes me more aware of what I am looking for and how to handle things in the future. Yikes...back to the drawing board...:)

I love this perspective! I am patiently waiting and searching for the perfect person I would want to disclose to as well! Thanks for the positive spin on it. Still scary, but this changes your attitude about it a bit! Thanks!

Hey ladies! I am a social worker too and got H 10 months ago...I don't think H cares what job we have. lol...We are all just real people. Everyone is looking for love, sex, relationships, etc. and you just never know. I use it to my advantage as well and think it makes me more down to earth and real with my clients. Having H builds character and empathy! We all have our issues, battles, and things we like to keep private. When someone is telling me about all of their issues, I often laugh and think oh we are all human, if they only knew my secret as well! lol. I too work with kids and am sure to talk to the older ones about making good choices. Maybe someday when I come to terms more with it, I will even speak about it to let others know it can happen to anyone...but just not there yet. So keep up the good work ladies and keep educating others...I am sure there are doctors, teachers, and even rockets scientists with H! I am getting more and more used to it and try to use it for the positive. Thanks!

You guys are all awesome! I loved your positive perspective Angel! I needed that reminder. It is hard enough to date and leave things up to the universe but you put it into terms that can make your disclosure sound even better and more positive. thanks!

Wow is all I have to say! Great writing and insight! I could totally relate! I too, like everyone else, have my own issues and insecurities about myself and appearance. However, I know on the outside I am a beautiful and hardworking and compassionate person. I have to keep reminding myself that I still am and that H doesn't define me or should hold me back from relationships and feeling sexy. Thanks for your inspirational post. I am so glad to have found the support on here where there is no stigma. The more we talk about it, the easier and less stressful it gets.

Hey everyone! Just curious because summer started and I love to tan and lay out, however, I realized that has caused a rash in my bikini zone area. I have had HSV2 for 6 months now and seem to have constant rashy outbreaks, not like my original blisters. Is that the shedding of the virus everyone is referring to? It kinda looks more like a heat rash in my bikini area or razor burn. I was just wondering how all of you experienced ladies deal with H in the summer? Help! Can I never wear a swimsuit again and lay out? It is so hard to shave and not irritate the area. I know H likes the sun, but can you lay out and just wear shorts to cover that area? Does that help? Does heat make it worse? Because it is hot and humid here! Not sure how to get around this- my daily suppressant does not seem to work (Valcyclovir) and I am getting frustrated! Anyone find any good remedies they can share or tips? My skin appears to be very sensitive to this virus. I feel like I can't have sex either because I always have a rashy outbreak in that area. Please send me some ideas...thanks! :)

Thanks! That was awesome for all of us to hear! Speaks so true for those of us with H that it will help us find the right person to love us! I will be sure to share it! Thanks for the inspiration! I needed this!

Thanks Harlow for sharing that video! I am a social worker too and that video described me to a T. I always put myself out there to help and be there for others no matter what and that often means being vulnerable and courageous and loving unconditionally- which often equals heartbreak for me. People and relationships come into my life through work and love and I always give 100% knowing they will probably move on, fail, or not follow through- and this video could be helpful for others to see why people behave in this way. It appears that so many don't feel worthy or fear rejection and don't feel the connection to others they need to feel happy in life. These feelings can really hold us back from living the life we truly deserve and are all worthy of. This video helped me see that in a positive way that I am out there living and worthy of love and that it isn't perfect like I often try to construct in my "social work" fixing way and that sometimes being vulnerable is ok and healthy and helps us to connect with others. Having H really makes you vulnerable to screening the relationships in your life and we all need to see that in a positive way that we can embrace. Thanks again for sharing!

Wow! Thanks for sharing your story! I love how you shifted from being lost and vulnerable in an unhealthy relationship to this strong woman that is independent, passionate, and ready to love herself and move on. Also way to go in starting the support groups with your friend...sounds awesome! Keep it up! HUGS!

I would like more info on this too. I also have had lots of rashes in my bikini area and thighs, but never a blister or sore like I did my first time. I feel like I break out a lot and the Dr. keeps saying it isn't an OB, but I swear I didn't have this many rashes from shaving or whatever before. It gets really red and irritated, especially when I tried the Olive Leaf once. I don't want to expose my partner when I have the rashes, but sores or pus never appear....but I suppose this still means I am contagious? right?

Sorry to hear your news...I can relate. I was diagnosed 6 months ago with gh and never thought it would happen to me either. My first outbreak was painful for 2 weeks and the worst. My Dr. said some have only 1 big outbreak and hardly any after that, so I just thought positive and told myself that I wasn't going to stress about it (cuz that makes it worse) and believe that I can overcome this. I take no medication, just Lysine and things have been fine. I have told 1 partner and he was awesome about it, no big deal. I haven't told my friends. I figure they don't need to know...I am still me! I don't let this define me. I am still an awesome mom, social worker and friend :) We all make mistakes, and we can't change this one, so best to learn how to deal with it. This site was a blessing, because everyone is so positive and helpful. When I first started researching on the internet, there were lots of whiners about how horrible this is and it has ruined their life, that made me sad because I like to focus on the positive and find the good even in a bad situation. So find a herpe buddy on here and get some support and don't let this own you! It has helped me exercise, eat right, and be more careful and learn to relax so I don't stress. It took me a few months and all the stages of grief, but it gets better. I live in a small town and know how it feels to be alone and think you are the only one with this secret...but here you can talk to anyone and see regular good people dealing with...very encouraging! Take care and private message me if you need to!

Thanks! I was wondering about that...this seemed like a larger skin outbreak and my 1st herpes OB was a small cluster on my inner thigh. I have not seen another cluster like that again...so is that what it will always be for future outbreaks- a cluster of blisters? I still seem to get more rashy looking things and I never see pus or anything. I am still confused. I probably had bikini area irritation/rashes before all of this and never thought twice about it, and now I 2nd guess every little thing! ugh...I just want to be sure so I don't expose my b/f. also...how long do outbreaks usually last?

Awesome! I had a similar 1st disclosure story a month ago and I agree with you...all of the handouts, statistics and positive stories on here on how to keep it positive and about not letting it define you, etc were so helpful!!! After the best date ever I too was shaking like a leaf and trying to remember the talk I had rehearsed a million times, because I had promised myself I would tell him before we went any further. It took about 5 minutes of silence to let him take it all in and then we ended up having the best night ever and he made me feel so beautiful. It is truly correct when they say that it can bring some relationships closer together...I told him I had never told anyone my secret and that I wasn't perfect, but was trying to find all of the good in it to move on, because that is how I am am....I am still an awesome mom, social worker, and friend. He agreed! :\">

Hi everyone! I was diagnosed with HSV2 6 months ago and I had a horrible classic first outbreak. It was textbook and now I am just trying to figure out my body and knowing my prodrome symptoms and OB signs. I haven't had many OB's and was convinced I was having one recently because I was stressed about doing my first disclosure to a guy I am seeing...go figure. (But the disclosure went awesome by the way, he was amazing about it :\"> ) Anyway...when I went in for my annual exam and I asked my Dr. if it was an OB, she said it was not and just a bad case of folliculitis. I think I disagree, but can anyone tell me if you have symptoms similar to this? I had tiny bumps and a kind of itchy rash in my bikini zone area on the upper V zone front part of my thigh on both sides. My Dr. said the sores would be lower than that, but I understand they can be anywhere down there. I was careful shaving and it seemed to clear up and then come back over the week. But I had a lot of red bumps and not all seemed to have hair...ugh! I am wondering if anyone waxes or has done laser in that bikini area so that they can tell the difference between an OB and folliculitis? It seems logical....girls please help me with some advice on if this would help clear up differences between the 2!?!? I have always shaved, but if waxing or laser helps I am totally going to try that....then it eliminates the guessing game. Ideas? Comments?

I am 37 and a single mom of 3 awesome kids. I was diagnosed 6 months ago and still trying to figure out my body and all the information out there on this. It seems overwhelming, but I have a positive personality and a high profile job and needed to get over the shame quickly. I am not letting this define me and I love that I found this support online and reading all of the stories truly helps you not feel alone, since that is how I feel in this small town of mine, with limited dating already...lol! I can't change my past, but I can decide how I am going to manage my future and I would like to help others along the way and make some friends. So message me if you want :)