Im a veteran too, from about 1984 or so..... also been married a couple times, did not give it to him. luckily, seeing things didnt work out. We split up for other reasons. We never discussed the herpes, I disclose and then after that first day, I just dont talk about it. If the guy stays, then he accepts me as is.... and Herpes is not me... - No one disclosed to me, just gave it to me without even a worry. Not nice. I wont do that to someone else. But if someone knows, and stays anyways, I dont want to spend all of our time - or even any of out precious time together discussing it. There are far too many wonderful times to be had. :)