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new_chapter

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Everything posted by new_chapter

  1. Hi Adrial, Thanks for reply. I have this need to categorize and compartmentalize the true options. I was hoping for an option that could provide a 100% guarantee to a prospective mate that they would never contract HSV from me. I was also hoping I could mimic a normal sexual relationship, without condoms or medication. That guarantee does not exist and in my mind, if that is true, it now shrinks the pool considerably of would be potential candidates. I believe and as I have read on these boards that there are people out there who do not understand the condition, or are fearful of it, they would disqualify you upon disclosure. True, maybe through education you might be able to seed a different response and reignite an opportunity with some of them. I understand that these people, could be viewed as judgmental, or ignorant and by having HSV this provides you an opportunity to hopefully attract people who are open minded. But that would be a smaller pool of candidates, and you will have to sort through the proverbial haystack to identify them. The bottom line is that there is no guarantee and your potential partner will most likely have to reconcile in their own minds that they risk being infected.
  2. I have been dating and now there is a relationship where I need to disclose my condition, because we are moving towards intimacy. My understanding is that to protect her 100% I need to use a condom or 90% use a drug like Valtrex which takes 7 - 9 days to become fully effective. I tested positive for HSV-2 and not HSV-1. I am resentful because I can't really feel sex with a condom (might as well be on an SSRI) and the drug option is something that chips away at your liver. So the only option that I can see is date someone who is positive for HSV. Is my perception correct or flawed? Thank you, Scott
  3. Sorry to go dark, but I have been in the process of picking up the pieces after her devastating admission. I have come to find out that I misunderstood her intention as it relates to her telling my family that I have HSV. I now understand her true intention is to tell my family that I gave her the herpes virus if I don't commit to staying with her. I am so upset! I have disclosed to my family that I have the virus and they are very supportive and concerned. She practically lived with me and now I am faced with the best approach in getting her possessions back to her. I pretty much have all her stuff packed and need to strategize on the the best option for her to retrieve. She is demanding that she be allowed to come into the apartment and verify that all of her stuff has been accounted. She is also demanding that I be there to negotiate in the event she finds discrepancies. Thank you for the hugs, support. I am running for the hills but I need to get this property issue resolved intelligently and hopefully quickly.
  4. Lelani and Alex, Thank you so much for your input and wisdom. I get the sense that neither one of you are novices as it pertains to this virus and the physical/emotional ramifications. I am in still in shock at the thought of my girl friend intentionally wanting to pass this on to me. I can't begin to tell you the all the thoughts that rumble through my brain. I am saddened beyond description. I thought she loved me and in addition, I am in shock that I would choose to be in a relationship with a person of questionable character. I have decided to suspend contact with her until I can come to terms with my grief. She left me a note on my door giving me an ultimatum that I have a week to make up my mind if we will remain in a relationship. She reasserted that I would never find anyone who would want me now because of this virus that I now have. She also has threatened to tell my family about it if I don't stay with her. I will take your words to heart that this virus would not hobble me from being in a healthy future relationship. Sounds like if I do nothing that this relationship will terminate without my participation. This is so hard to believe, almost fells like Jerry Springer. Scott
  5. I, as many others, have discovered that I have herpes, which I contracted from my current relationship. When I confronted my girlfriend about the test results she broke down and cried that she knew. I asked her why she did not disclose it at the beginning of the relationship. She shared that she was angry at the the person who gave it to her. I paused and then asked her what she meant by that. She screamed that she is pissed off at men and she wants payback for what was done to her! I couldn't believe my ears and I am in total shock! Most importantly, I can't believe that I am in a relationship with this person and I must have missed the red flags throughout our one year relationship. She went on that she is a piece of crap and that together we do not amount to much more than that. She said that now I have it, no else would want me and that I might as well stay with her. Has anyone else dealt with a situation like this? Infected and heartbroken.
  6. Does anyone have any experience with Herpes dating sites or the best way to meet singles in your community who have herpes? Thank you.
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