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Randb22

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Everything posted by Randb22

  1. Oh Boy, So much to catch you guys up on.. So the wife and I have been to her appointment and she is HSV2 positive as well..(Lucky Me) My second round result was as I expected HSV2 positive also.. Add insult to injury the wife is 2 months pregnant.. Can my life get any worse??? Geez. Adrial I get what you were saying that we both have done some things wrong ion our marriage but lets be honest my wife holds the "trump" card so to speak because yes she was writing, visiting and sending money to and incarcerated man that she knew she was not physically cheating on me to cause the issue we have today. My wife was pregnant in 09 and was tested for HSV 1 and 2 and she was negative I have no ideas what prompted her OB to test as to my understanding it is not routine but she was and she was negative so this is all on my shoulders at this point. As if my situation was not bad enough I have another baby on the way and my wife is not a happy camper about being pregnant and having genital herpes. What am I to do? I have to be honest I was relieved to hear my wife was positive because I knew she would not leave me but I was not as amused to hear she was pregnant, (just being honest) so here I am I have HSV2 my wife does not want to have sex with me and neither will anyone else. My wife has outted me to everyone. I am going to be honest I had a Cabo trip booked for next month with a swingers group and she outted me on the groups FB page. WTH is that all about? If I were going to play it would have absolutely been the safest way possible. I feel like I have hit rock bottom. My wife claims to divorce me and sue me for damages under the tort law claiming I did not act accordingly and I have caused her and our unborn child bodily harm and I have alienated her from affection.. Who does this? If you are done then be done don't get some hot shot attorney to humiliate me in court. I feel like I have a right to not be tortured in the court system. I have no idea what to do where to turn or who to talk to to. My life, marriage, and relationships outside of marriage are non existent. I have nothing at this point. I fear coming home and my wife and children are gone one day. I know she is planning and there is nothing I can do about it. I am pissed because I have ALWAYS,ALWAYS had safe sex but I guess that does not stop genital herpes. What has my life become.
  2. Thanks for the quick response. I know I may seem to come off a certain way but I truly want to be as honest as possible with my words. To answer your questions no my wife was not aware she suspected for years she would question "fellas trips" and she has found swinger profiles and sites in the computer history. All of these things have just started to unravel over the past 2 months. The wife and I had a falling out over her writing her first boyfriend in prison and she had been to see him and sent him money with that discovery I left our marital home and that's when all hell broke lose. She became CSI on me and I was busted. She also had the aid of some "unknown" person that told I was still sleeping with my ex even though the wife and I have been married almost 5 years this "unknown" person text my wife and told her that my ex gave him HSV2 and that I needed to be tested and here we are today. I am aware of the hurt I have imposed on my wife I am but I have to be honest I don't want this to run my life. I understand my wife feels like she's a victim but how can we ever move on if she continuously humiliates me and takes jabs at me. I am very aware of what I have done to her and I am truly sorry but what am I to do? Close myself in the closet? After all the infidelities came out prior to the test results the wife was willing to explore so to speak with me when I left my wife I did book a trip with the adult group for Cabo this June and I had the agent add my wife on my reservation. Now that the results have come out my wife wants to shut everything down I have changed I'm not out here doing the things I was before sneaking around lying cheating nothing will be done without her. I don't see why we can't with precaution. Her wanting to control everything and be the shot caller has placed a thread within the closed FB group for the swingers group telling them about this exact situation. That's straight b.s to humiliate me. Why would she do that. I don't want this out there in the public. We haven't even talked to the doctor yet to find out info on how to minimize transmission. So now I have to be humiliated on this trip and people looking and treating us both like we are crazy. All I want to do is live life and be happy and she is not allowing me to do that. have I hurt her YES have I possibly infected her YES but she's not going to die. Like I told her This is not as bad as she thinks it is. It's not a death sentence. Let's move on. she has done nothing but turned against me and is at the front of the line to destroy me. I don't blame her for not wanting to have sex with me but we agreed to move forward and now she is going back on everything she has said and now what am I to do.. Not live life or live life exactly how she thinks I'm suppose too.. I'm confused and upset.. My life is falling apart and there is nothing I can do about it.
  3. Hello Everyone, Husband and Wife here looking for answers, same as everyone else I suppose. Due to infidelity in marriage I have been made aware that I have been infected with HSV2 I have been tested recent as last week and have a positive result for HSV2 and HSV1 negative. My wife is due to be tested Wednesday and I will also be re-tested. I know chances of getting a different result is slim but hey we are going to be at doctors office anyway for her testing, why not roll up my sleeve again. I had a blood draw test and she will have the same. Of course my wife is livid at how such a thing could have happened. Of course it does not help that over the years she has preached to me about cheating and fear of "things in this world that can kill us" I have not listened and here we are living out my worse nightmare. Chances of her staying are slim to none I'm sure especially if she is lucky enough to test negative. So my concerns going forward are for those that are HSV2 Positive do you tell possible sexual partners your status. I'm going to be honest I feel like if I take every precaution possible to play safe is it my responsible to tell or is it that unspoken rule that when you sleep with someone they have to understand there is a possible risk involved. I feel like this is not as bad as my wife is making it out to be because 1.she may not even be infected 2. it's not a death sentence. I am going to be honest as of late my wife has discovered my swinger lifestyle I have traveled as a single man to other countries with a particular adult group and I have had sex in this environment do you guys think I have to disclose my health status if I want a blow job or I want to perform oral on a woman. My wife thinks I am obligated to tell everyone I have sexual contact with I totally disagree. I have a good idea how long I may have been infected I have never had any symptoms or outbreaks that I have noticed nor has my wife so reading the percentages above I gather that the chance of me infecting someone is rather slim, right? If I use condoms every time I should be ok? I mean considering I don't have an outbreak site I don't have to worry about what the condom covers and I can still use my mouth to please without passing infection right.. where are the hard core questions and answers. I don't want to have a sexless life. If my wife is negative there is no way she will have sex with me so how can I expect any other negative woman too.. Hell if I tell the truth and she jumps in bed with me what may she have.. I don't want this to run my life and I will not live in fear.. Advice Anyone?
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