I was just diagnosed about a month ago as well. I'm 26. I know EXACTLY how you feel. I am SO sorry you're going through this and you're a virgin! I'm also pretty asymptomatic. First were you diagnosed via igg? How long ago was the rubbing incident. If it's an igg of 8.81 is sounds like it's an old infection. Antibodies don't usually show up until about 3-6 months after exposure.
Some things that have been helping me are researching Dr. Kelly Shuh, Dr. Sheila Loanzon and Kirsty Spraggon! Also taking lysine, vitamin D3 and b12.
1.) yes you are safe kissing guys!
2.) while it's possible to transfer herpes that's usually when you're symptomatic and newly infected.
3.)hsv2 does not prefer the mouth! While it's possible it's unlikely.
4.)experts say any index number over 3.5 is conclusive.
Sending good thoughts and prayers your way! Hang in there! This doesn't define us!