PrettyLady

I’ve read that outbreaks eventually turn into one painless bump that can be located anywhere in the “boxer short area”. I think this happ ma to me- I thought it was a shaving bump because it was nowhere near my original outbreak spot..

I guess everyone’s experience is different.. the lingering tingly feeling may be because it hasn’t fully healed yet/ some people have symptoms for up to two weeks. But they should shorten over time. Yes I have noticed the amount of outbreaks and severity has definitely gotten better over time. My key has been trying to cut back on stress, getting adequate sleep, exercise, nutrition, and limiting alcohol (anything that affects the immune system- just like if you were treating/avoiding a cold).

In a way, it’s a good thing that you have symptoms because it gives you the knowledge to protect your partners! Over time I’m sure the symptoms will dissipate. I’ve decided to track the 7 days starting the day after all symptoms end. I think 5-7 days is reasonable but I would talk to your man about this and ask if that sounds like a good plan. I would also encourage him to learn as much as he can about it so he can make informed decisions.

Over the ten years I’ve had it, I’ve found most men are understanding. Some can’t see past it but it sounds like you found a good person. It’s really no big deal and very common but most people don’t get symptoms. Good luck and keep me posted!!

https://westoverheights.com/forum/herpes/herpes-questions/ This is the website of a Herpes expert

I highly recommend using s vibrator while giving oral- everyone is happy ;) From what I have read, contracting Genital Herpes to the mouth is rare, but if it happens there would likely be one outbreak and he’d probably never see it again, or rarely. But still, it is all about what makes your partner comfortable. My bf has cold sores on his lips, hasn’t had any outbreaks since I’ve been with him, but I am taking a risk too, and I accept it! Oral herpes rarely contracts to the genitals also, or so I’ve read. I’ll paste a couple helpful links for you..

Ugh yeah it’s always a waiting game :/ I never have sex when there is an active outbreak.. and very recently I discovered to wait 7 days until after the outbreak has cleared. In the meantime, we do other things... oral sex for him and a vibrator for me. I prefer to keep my parties on also. Then once I’m in the clear, we have great sex!! I always tell my partners about it upfront.. usually date 3 or 4. Sometimes they stick around, sometimes they don’t! I’m currently in a relationship - been about 5 months and he’s very understanding. When I’m feeling the first sign of an outbreak I tell him “let’s do other things this week” and he gets it. It’s important for me to protect others because I didn’t have the luxury of being informed my ex had it! He said he didn’t know which is very possible.. most people apparently have no symptoms but they “shed” the virus. You probably already know that!

My experience has been that I need to take the valtrex a couple days longer than the recommended dosage, otherwise it comes back shortly after. But once it’s gone I have no tingling sensations or any other symptoms. What I’ve read is if the outbreak is on the thigh or buttock region, it takes longer for the outbreak to clear than if it was in a region that has thin skin. Happy new year!

Thank you as well and good luck!!

I haven’t noticed a difference with the lysine- but that could be because my stress just takes over and a supplement isn’t strong enough. I did notice that once I stopped shaving I got less outbreaks. I had the hair lasered off and it has definitely helped. TMI but I recommend it! I also read recently to put “new skin” liquid bandage on your break out and it clears much faster. I haven’t tried it yet but I have read good reviews. Not sure how long you have had it/ I have had it about 10 years and it definitely gets much better over time. It doesn’t bother me at all anymore, it’s just that I don’t want my bf to get it, and I’m dreading when I have to tell him we can’t have sex because of an outbreak. He’s very sweet about it, but it still sucks :/

I take valtrex and lysine daily. Even with suppressivectherspy when I’m super stressed out I start to feel the first sign of an outbreak and I’ll double the antiviral for a couple days. Sometimes I think I overdo it which causes stress! What works for you?

Thanks for the input- I recently read that you should wait up to one week after visible signs clear, because you are likely still “shedding”. I think I’ll go with 7 days to be safe. My man hasn’t gotten it yet and my goal is to keep it that way!

How long should I wait before I have sex with my partner after a break out clears and the Valtrex dosages have been taken? Thank you!

Thank you for the comment!

Hello, Hoping to get some clarification by someone knowledgeable. I keep reading contradicting facts about HSV2. When I was first diagnosed, my doctor had agreed with me that I should cover the outbreak with a bandage. The bandage irritates my skin though so I started researching if it actually helps prevent spreading to a new spot. I have recently read that you can’t reinfect yourself even if there is an active blister. Once you’re infected, you can’t re-infect yourself. I am always very careful with the way I sit and move around so the outbreak does not contact another spot in the general region. It is very stressful to have to worry about this! But now it seems as though I have been worrying for no reason, but it’s didficult to believe. Over the ten years I’ve had an outbreak only in one spot but I always wonder if my shaving bumps, etc are actually an outbreak :( I read that you can get an outbreak anywhere in the “boxer shorts” region at anytime, simply because you have the infection, not because you are spreading it. I guess what I’m asking is should I be afraid of spreading the virus to a different location, or is it pointless to cover the outbreak? Can an outbreak show up in a new spot, simply because I have the virus? Also I recently read about covering outbreaks with a liquid band aid called “nu skin”. I have read that it burns but is extremely effective at healing because of the ointment. I’m afraid that this could leave a mark/scab/scar. Anyone have experience with this? Thank you as always for your input!

Thank you hikinggirl! I've had HSV2 for 8 years and my bf has had HSV1 orally for as long as he can remember. We both seem to have healthy immune systems. I take daily antivirals as well as Lysine. He hasn't had a breakout in 5 years. To both our knowledge, we have never given it to any of our partners. Even if the chance of infecting each other is remote, which appears to be the case, I come from the school of anything can happen, so proceed with caution. These comments give me a lot to think about. Thank you both!

Thank you very much, optimist! I read both articles and they were very helpful. I guess the bottom line is that we both need to be careful because we could possibly reinfect each other. Hopefully we both have built up antibodies over the years. Thanks again for your thoughts!

I'm confused. My boyfriend recently asked his doctor questions about my HSV2 and his HSV1 and the responses don't align with what my dr told me about 8 years ago when I contracted. If anyone has definitive answers to these questions, would you please share / clarify? 1. We were told that HSV1 (oral) can only be spread to genitals during oral sex when there is an actual blister on his lip, but that I could give him HSV2 on his genitals, or mouth even when I am not having an outbreak. Is this true? 2. If he contracts my HSV2 on his genitals, can he give it to me again on a different location of my vagina, in other words can we reinfect each other during sex? I read that once you have HSV1 on one part of the body, it acts as an immunity and you can't catch it again. Is that true, and if so is it true about both HSV1 & HSV2? Is herpes research inconclusive at this time? I feel like there are contradictions among doctors. Thank you for reading / providing informative responses!

You did nothing wrong, you were honest and you chose the time that felt right. It sounds like he is very immature and you are better off without him. He should have at least given you a chance and taken it slowly. He may come back after he has had time to realize he misses you and he made a mistake. In my experience, they usually do (not always). Also in my experience, older men seem to be much more educated, sensitive and understanding. Hang in there and don't let it get you down. Stay confident and keep searching because he is out there!

I'm glad! Sounds like that person doesn't deserve you :)

So I have had H for almost 10 years. When I first found out, I was about 26 and had contracted from a boyfriend who either didn't know, or didn't tell me. I stayed with him out of fear that No one else would want me, but after a year I broke it off for other reasons.I suffered severe anxiety for that first year, assuming my love life was over. I met someone I really liked and was dreading the conversation, but I couldn't accept not giving him the opportunity to decide for himself. To my surprise, he said "that doesn't change anything" and we barely talked about it. I was even more surprised when he actually meant it as we dated for several months and had a great sex life. That relationship ended for different reasons but I will never forget how kind and sensitive his reaction was. Shortly after I met another great guy who loved me for me and we spent 3 years together. Long story short, he didn't want to be married and I did so we parted ways. As scared as I was to have to have the "conversation" again, I was very hopeful because of the luck I had with the 2 previous men. These men by the way never contracted it from me. I took 500mg valtrex daily for one year along with Lysine and Zinc, and tried to live a heathy immune boosting life (stress is a killer). I would also wear condoms if they prefer, and never have sex if I feel any sign of a symptom. So after the past several years of dating, my luck with the topic has been about 50/50. There was really only one guy who was rude and never contacted me. Others either needed time, or gently ended the relationship. Some came back after a period of time. I have never let someone back in though, because although I don't blame them, I can't forget the shame I feel after being abandoned. I can honestly say that the condition itself doesn't bother me at all. It's been under control for years. The only bad part is having this conversation and waiting patiently. Although I have the H, I will never settle for someone that I'm not crazy about! It's been a long road and I'm still searching, some days I feel hopeless and lonely, but with support of family and friends I feel that I deserve to find love with the right guy! I met someone a couple weeks ago who I am very interested in. Our chemistry is on fire! We get along so well and have so much fun. The feelings seem mutual and I've been so excited. As always, in the back of my mind I can't get too excited. It's like a dark cloud looming. Dating is difficult enough without having a 'deadlbreaker' situation. So anyways, I just told him last night. We had started getting very physical the past 2 dates and I felt ready to tell him. I took a chance, because I feel like we have a mutual connection. I always try to go into it with confidence and be very clear and open, without giving TMI all at once. I completely lost confidence, I fumbled, and I barely made eye contact! His reaction: blank stare. He looked embarrassed and shocked while also trying so hard to be cool. I felt worse for him than for me! I tried to lighten the mood a little, we watched some tv, etc- I made some lame jokes. Suddenly he started to kiss me and it got hot & heavy! I was pleasantly surprised. We didn't go "all the way" which is smart. So now I am experiencing the familiar waiting game. I don't want to reach out first because if I were him, I would want space. I also don't want him to think I'm mortified and scared to reach out. What's worse than having H is having H and no confidence! We shall see. Good luck to all you men & ladies who are going through similar experiences! Just remember it's not your fault, and it's soooo common!!! :)