Susan

I have had HSV-2 for over 21 years. I was diagnosed while in a 7 year relationship with my husband and 7 months pregnant with my first child. My baby was delivered safely and she is a beautiful HSV-negative young lady. My husband told me that he didn’t have it, and I must have gotten it from a previous boyfriend as there is such a thing as a 7 year “dormancy”….I will add he is a physician. When I divorced him several years later, due to persistent adultery, the fact of HSV-2 and dating hit me hard. I was honest with potential intimate relationships and I have to say, I have never met such cruel insensitive and ignorant people. The first, recoiled when I went to hold his hands while sitting across the table from him. After all this time, you would think that I would have adapted and come to terms with the commonality of this virus, but I haven’t. Recently, I had the conversation with a new relationship and was told that he was having difficulty dealing with the “Russian Roulette” factor and that he would continuously “worry” about getting it. I told him that herpes isn’t something that someone wants, but I was absolutely sure it would not blow his brains out! I continue to be devastated (this just happened) even after all these years. Being alone has a lot of comfort, and isolating myself from socializing is also safe. I am drowning in work and feel this is an option. It is too bad that the fact that I am honest has zero value. I understand why people don’t tell; rejection is a very humiliating experience. I have been asymptomatic for more than 10 years (I can’t remember the last one) so I could easily lie about it. I am an honest person and could not continue a relationship on a lie. If people want honesty, they need to grow up and handle it…..they probably already have herpes and not know it.