heisen

HI, I'm a 26 year old male living in Indiana. Open to making friends male or female who reside in Indiana, or honestly anywhere. I was just diagnosed 4/20/17... LOL . Definitely having a very hard time with this new life. My story is long and pretty messed up. Maybe only from my point of view. I am not perfect. Far from it. Message me if you are interested in offering support, or if you want to chat about anything. Looking forward to the journey, trying to stay optimistic!

Hello (anyone who is reading)... I was diagnosed with Herpes on 4/20/2017. My story is long and will more than likely bore most people. I started a new job August of 2016. At the time i was dating someone going on 4 years. To be honest, it was the longest and most meaningful relationship I have ever been in. I am 26 going to be 27 on October 23rd. She is 23. She has a little boy. They were truly my world. Before the job change i was working 2 jobs. In went to school for physics but never finished due to financial reasons. I was trying to work very hard to give them a life I thought we all deserved and what I wanted for us. I am a very intimate person, and sexually expressive. Our sex life was fantastic. I am struggling with the decisions I have made in my past, as I am the reason we are no longer with one another. I feel like a terrible person. I cheated on her(not romantically, just physically). I slipped outside of our relationship in search of sexual thrill. Why? Don't ask me... I really made a mistake. When she found out about all this, It was over. We stopped talking, and i became a mess. I have been single since we broke up. With no encounters or dating experiences. Now to the part that fits where we all are. I was clean, I got tested a few times. People kept me in the loop about her, and i found out she was dating a guy I used to work with and was out being "irresponsible" after we broke up. I was the second person she ever slept with when we met. Time goes by, and she pops back into my life for various reasons. Money, attention, the guy she was dating at the time(she was being abused physically and mentally), etc. I was there for her every single time she contacted me. I helped her and gave her my everything with hopes of getting back together. In the end of every encounter I was given the same response and that was she couldn't forgive me for cheating. So she would disappear. Finally she came crawling back to me and i opened my door like i did every single time before. She ditched this guy, and things were good for a little over a month. We took things slow on purpose, until we made love once again. Over and over again. She left with money for a vacation in her pocket. She left, and came back and things were the same old song and dance and we haven't talked since.... I decided to get back out there after because i was tired of feeling terrible so I had a few encounters (using protection).. I now have Herpes.... I have my guess as to where I contacted it :( ... but i have never been one to point fingers. There is a lot more to my story... It is hard to begin to explain how I am feeling.. I am by no means suicidal.. but my life has become that much more hard. I am sorry for being long winded. It has taken me a long time to join a community like this and I am hoping for some positive feedback. I definitely try to hold my head up every single day. I have told nobody in my life, and my father is my best friend. Thank you for reading, I look forward to being more a part of the community. I have speculated for some time and finally decided to join.