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movin_on_up

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  1. Hi everyone, thanks for the kind words. Just to have people to listen and talk about it without the stigma is reassuring and comforting. Sorry for the late reply, I have been away doing internal work and I must say I already feel so much better about the situation. Yes the herpes is still there and also potentially a small wart but my relationship to it has changed. Maybe it's just because I don't think about it so much and the shock of it has gone but it definitely doesn't feel so bad when I think about it. I have got into the practice of stopping negative thoughts in their track and replacing them with more constructive ones instead - "it's literally nothing more than just a cold-sore, the physical symptoms aren't unbearable, it's not going to kill me and any reasonable human will understand that it's not a big deal". I've not had to go through a disclosure yet, I'm waiting till I've got the green light from my doc that the warts are gone. I don't think I can cope with disclosing both in one go! And just like you said @Alala, my doctor tells me that most evidence suggests a healthy body clears them in around 3 months if they don't reappear after treatment and there is no need to mention it to anyone when they're gone. Listening to @hippyherpy and reframing the idea of STIs as almost a scouts badge, rather than a black mark helped as well. So thanks for that! When I read a story about the stigma of herpes coming about from a marketing campaign by pharmaceutical companies a few decades back that also helped me think of it in a more positive way and I shall definitely be using that one in the future! I mean really it isn't that much different from cold-sores, they're annoying but, who cares?! I did have one moment when out with friends at Xmas and they were joking about STIs and asking if anyone has ever had any and it did make me feel a bit sick and distressed, but other than that life feels like it's getting better! Let's hope the positivity continues!
  2. Hi everyone, so I've been hanging around on these forums for the past month or so while overcoming the initial shock of the diagnosis and feel I need to ask for some advice. First of all I just want to say how glad I am, as I'm sure everyone else is here, that these support forums exist as I couldn't imagine what it would be like facing this without any community. So anyway basically here it is and I'm sorry for going on a bit, I guess I'm finding it cathartic just to get this off my chest... I am feeling a bit in the dumps right now. I am a 27yo guy from the UK and recently returned back to the country after moving abroad for a job. Unfortunately it was an impromptu trip back after I quit my job due to a friend/boss who I worked with turned out to have some pretty unsavoury characteristics that made my life there unpleasant. Financially rocky, with nothing lined up I flew home and moved back into my parent's house while I tried to sort myself out. This situation alone at this point left me in a anxious, depressed state with which I was diagnosed by my GP. In an attempt to try and bring a fresh perspective to my life I went on a camping trip with a friend (lady), who I hadn't known that long and had mainly kept in contact by writing. To cut a long story short, contrary to my usual restraint and previous responsible nature, under the influence, we ended up having unprotected sex. Utterly panicked, 2 days later I found a small lesion that wouldn't disappear. Fast forward 1 week and I was getting swabbed at my local GUM clinic. The symptoms themselves were quite mild, being only 2 small lesions maybe 3mm wide, that weren't painful so the doctor wasn't convinced it was herpes by sight. Results day comes and I find out it's HSV2. Gutted. Thrown on the top of where I was already in life it was almost a burden too much to bear. I'd be lying if suicide didn't cross my mind many times a day. 3 weeks later, still struggling mentally, I got this further itchy rash that was causing me grief and difficulties sleeping at night. Assuming it was some further effect of the H I returned to the clinic to see if I could get some acyclovir to help ease things and potentially get as suppression therapy, knowing it could aid in the possible future 'disclosure talk'. They weren't sure the rash was a herpes and pinned it down to the irritation causing mild dermatitis as it had an unusual appearance (dry, rough), but I was given a week's worth of acyclovir nonetheless more I think to ease my nerves than for anything else. (Turns out after my own research and treatment it seems to be thrush as it was very receptive to the Caneston cream from the chemist). Anyway, at the time I mentioned that I had this tiny raised bump on the base of my penis as well, not really thinking much of it, not even considering I might have contracted anything else. How wrong was I. The nurse brings in the doctor for a second opinion and with both of them inspecting me, the doctor tells me it looks 'warty'. Oh for fuck sake. I couldn't believe it. Seeing I was probably white as a sheet, the doctor reassured me that more people than not have the virus and I needn't worry and once it's gone I don't need to mention it to anyone. Seeing as I was still white as a sheet he booked me in to have a special consultation with him to have a chat and try and ease my worries. To finish things up I was given a dose of cryotherapy (which didn't work as there needs to be repeat applications apparently) and sent on my way. So here I am. Unemployed, diagnosed with herpes, diagnosed with genital warts, a good bout of thrush to boot and all in all feeling pretty sorry for myself indeed! First of all, if any of you don't mind lending an ear I'd like to know if anyone has had this double diagnosis and how things turned out for them. Maybe any success stories to be had in this particular situation? Also I'm reading conflicting views online, all from seemingly legitimate sources, about whether genital warts, specifically the HPV 6 & 11 strains that cause wart formations, can be considered 'cleared' for all practical purposes after a period of around 3-12 months following the last visible symptom, ie. there is no obligation to disclose. My main interest with this is that I am desperately hanging on to hope that there is grounding to not having to disclose both STI's as really I see throwing one on top of the other in a disclosure talk akin to throwing any future relationship chances under a bus. My doctor tells me not to worry and that there is no point disclosing past warts but being a moral creature I wanted to get some second opinions and see what you guys thought on this. If you made it through this unnecessarily wordy and whiny post, thank you for listening. I hope at least for any of you going through a 'singular' diagnosis this provides some comfort in knowing it could be worse! Any words of advice from anyone, anywhere much appreciated!
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