sweet66

sometimes i think these doctors have hsv themselves and are in denial. seriously. i didn't learn anything from mine. i learned it all on my own and from folks in forums like this. it's ridiculous.

@teawiththequeen i wish you the best. did you get your results yet? do what you need to go get through it, you are what i consider to be grieving the loss of who you used to be, essentially - at least that's how i felt about it. in the end i hope you both can settle in and be okay. i hope you quickly find a way to integrate this into your life, unlike i have. maybe that's my work for this year. happy holidays.

@lifegoeson, i didn't have sex with anyone else except my ex at that point. and since this guy admitted to having it, i know it was him. i wished bad things on him for a long time. i guess i still do. i haven't made peace with it even all these years later.

all but the hsv2 piece. when i got hsv1 i got really really sick. my neutrophil count is really low so i don't fight of infections as easily as you do. i just can't take that chance.

thank you <3

wow. life is funny and unexpected. glad for you.

for those of you who have HSV1 genitally, have you noticed if there are many folks out there with the same? i've been on the dating site a couple of times but have never actually met anyone from there. i hate online dating anyway. but here's my situation. i am not actually unhealthy at the moment, i live an active life, work full time, getting back to exercising after the new year, spent a good part of this last year following a dream and it was amazing. so, just to say, i'm not a sick person. however, i have bone marrow issues and my neutrophil (one of the WBC's) count keeps dropping. this means that i am more prone to outbreaks and have to take daily valtrex. i even get breakthrough outbreaks and sometimes have to take it twice a day. i can't imagine having that talk with anyone. there is such i high chance i could infect someone else. i also hesitate to risk contracting HSV2 because i don't need one more virus to fight. if in the end i have to get a bone marrow transplant, which means they will obliterate my immune system in order to receive the transplant, i DEFINITELY don't want to invite more incurable viruses. so, in a perfect world, i would find someone who is perfect for me AND hsv1 positive. in the meantime, i stay single and try to live a full life. all tips, insight and experience welcomed.

i have fear that who ever i disclose to will tell others. i am not dating. i'm terrified to date. but i have some health issues too that make the herpes more active chronically. it's very sad. i'm lonely, but it's too tricky a situation.

sorry, old post. just noticed the date.

If i'm not mistaken, Terri is no longer involved. I got a question to her right when she was about to leave. i don't know if anyone has taken over.

what lifegoeson said. wait for the test results.

your pictures definitely look like they could be herpes, especially given your positive swab. as i said in another post, the swab does not diagnose which type of hsv, that takes a blood test. yes, he could have given it to you in both places with his oral infection, but you can't be sure that he doesn't have it genitally either. he could, and could have been shedding. so, just to be clear, he could have given you a genital herpes infection via his mouth or his penis. and you could have gotten an oral infection via his mouth or his penis. if you are sure he gave you herpes, i don't understand why you are afraid to approach him with this. maybe it's because he's acting like he doesn't have a problem? he should actually know he has a problem so that he doesn't do this to anyone else unless the consent. hang in there.

hi teawiththequeen. i remember so well how it felt when i first got herpes, your story brings me right back. i started dating a new person. we had sex and used a condom. but i got herpes anyway. started with a little spot genitally, then before i knew it i had sores inside my mouth and painful sores genitally and some hard bumps which i think were lymph nodes. i was so sick for so long. pale, exhausted. and i sat in the dark googling and googling, feeling so alone in the world, doing anything i could to keep busy in my dark little apartment because i didn't want to close my eyes and try to sleep, it was too emotionally painful to be quiet. however, i didn't have any fear about confronting the guy because i knew he gave it to me.. i went off on him. he admitted that he knew he had herpes and he didn't tell me. he offered to bring me medicine or anything i needed, but at that point i wanted nothing to do with him. he ruined my life, and i told him so. i was also not promiscuous. that was 11 years ago. regarding testing, the swab will only tell you that you have herpes. western blot is the best way to diagnose hsv1, and i was almost a year in before i got a positive diagnosis. imagine that. but yes IgG and IgA are the tests you need, for each virus. one of them, i'm not sure which, tells whether the infection is new, one of them reflects antibodies developed over time. it sounds to me like he is responsible for giving it to you since your outbreak is so bad. BUT, if he doesn't have much in the way of outbreaks, he may never have looked into getting diagnosed. that said, it's possible he knows and is too much of a coward to be honest with you (i say this based on my personal experience). i completely understand what you are going through. it's a dark place. but things will get better. if there is someone close to you that you can confide in for moral support and just to unload, i recommend that. be good to yourself, though i know that's hard to do when all you want to do is cry and take back what you did. in time you will integrate it into your mind and your life. you will be okay. i promise. much love.

he can get it either way. there's no 100 per cent way for him to be protected. as i mentioned, we used a condom and he still gave me genital hsv1.

http://www.flare.com/sex-and-relationships/usher-herpes/