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  1. Hello! I am new to this group and I am looking for support and advice. When I was 13-16, I was in a relationship where I was frequently sexually assaulted. He would coerce me into having sex with him with threats of self-inflicted harm. He told his parents we were having sex and they supported it. I was young and was upset with myself for being uncomfortable - if it was okay with everyone else why was I so upset? I was embarrassed to tell my friends or my parents, so I bit my tongue and they still are unaware to this day. After two and a half years, that relationship ended but it was a lot harder to navigate the world after that. In my junior year of college (six years later) I talked about it for the first time to my favorite professor, and he helped me through therapy and to work through what had happened. I was finally becoming comfortable with who I was physically, and I felt ready to take on the world. A few months later, I was in a new relationship and everything was going smoothly. I told him about what happened in my first relationship and he was very considerate of how I was feeling every step of the way. He was the first person I comfortably had sex with. Within the first two weeks of us being together physically, I tested positive for HSV. Before we were together, I had him get updated STD tests, and we always used protection. I talked to him about it and he was unaware that he had it. We worked through it together, but we broke up a few months later for unrelated reasons. Now that I am alone, I am genuinely coming to terms with all of this for the first time. When I was with my ex we didn't have to worry about passing it because we clearly both had it. Now, I am facing the reality of how this will impact my life and the relationships I may forge. It took me six years to become comfortable in my sexuality, and it feels like that was ripped from my hands. I am having issues being comfortable with myself, let alone other people. I recently have been talking to someone that is everything I could need in a person, and him and I get along very well. I am very anxious to talk to him about it. I feel like it is definitely too soon to bring it up, but I am so tired of having this weight on my chest. This is the kind of conversation I would want to have in person, but due to the recent COVID pandemic that is definitely not an option. I kind of want to rip the bandaid off and tell him about my first relationship and my HSV status, but I am not sure the best way to move forward in doing so. I am not sure how to navigate through all of this, and any advice would be greatly appreciated.
  2. I was diagnosed with hsv 1&2 about three weeks ago. I never had a outbreak or any symptoms. I decided to get a full screening for everything. I tested positive for it. Now I wasn’t sexually active for over 6 months so basically there is no clue how long I’ve had this with no symptoms. The day after I found out I had my period and I had slight irritation thinking maybe it was just that time of the month. Got it swabbed and it tested positive for hsv2 so I was having a outbreak. No pain nothing. I was given Valtrex. Now reading the forum I decided to Conroe suppressive medication to remain outbreak free. Now since I’ve been taking Valtrex well (Valacyclovir) everyday I notice lots of irritation and now one little pimple size bump continue to pop up at the crack of the butt-!”no pain) itching (vaginal- no bumps or anything), and leg pain( never had any of these symptoms before the medication)Could this just be my body getting use to the medication? sorry for the TMI
  3. Hi everyone, I found out over the summer that I contracted hsv 2. I am learning to deal with it and am grateful for forums like this which have helped me in more ways than I can count. I do have some questions that I am hoping to get some answers, or just opinions about. 1. What are the odds of a person having had 100 sexual partners, NOT having hsv 2? The person I believe infected me, has had at least 100 partners. He is refusing to be tested, or making all kinds of excuses. I have stopped asking him. I think he has looked at the statistics and would rather not know. I'm just curious as to what you all think his chances are at being negative? It seems almost impossible from what I have read. There is only 1 other possible source partner, and he claims to be negative, although I have not seen his labwork. 2. I started valtrex the day my culture came back positive for hsv 2. When the antibodies finally showed up in the bloodwork, there was a 6.82 igg level. I've been doing additional herbal supplements, praying for healing, strengthening my immune system, and eating well. I also believe in mind over matter, and I've been very positive about healing myself. My results and dates are as follows: August 15th 6.82 igg September 5th 2.42 igg October 1st 1.19 igg I've not had any additional outbreak since the first, which was relatively painless and looked like a razor abrasion. I've taken 1 gram of valtrex daily since August 10th, a long with Lysine, olive leaf, oregano oil. I also use a topical mix of melissa oil, peppermint oil, and oregano oil twice a week. These have all been studied by NIH and proven to kill the virus in vitro. I apply this ointment to my genital area with a carrier oil before I go to bed. Does the fact that my igg level has dropped drastically in such a short time have any clinical significance as to how contagious I am? If I go back to negative, does this mean I am no longer hsv 2 positive? I do understand that this is supposedly a non-curable condition, but I have some different beliefs that have worked for me in the past. Do the low numbers indicate that I am less likely to transmit? Thank you all for your help. This has been very difficult and I am trying to wrap my head around this, while not losing faith that anything is possible. Janey
  4. This is what I have come to realise....for now! I had my first OB 3 weeks ago after being sleep deprived and morning the loss of a loved one. I didn't know what the hell it was. I couldn't wee without crying, nothing was working, and for me I had very large ulcers on my clitoris and very near the entrance of my vagina. I was sure it was thrush where I itched so much. Well turns out it was an OB of type 2. Absolutely gutted. I have been through all the emotions. Dirty, shameful, sad, like one big fat walking germ and the biggest one....lonelyness, but what I have come to realise is what the hell can I do about it now. I'm not crying over it night after night, I'm gonna get up, get dressed, straighten my crown and carrying the hell on enjoying life! It's doesn't matter if it's your first time, u used condoms every time, or your enjoying your sexual confidence, whatever, we can all still get it or got Herpes. I am still here, I am still alive and I am still ME. And more importantly there is fuck all I can do about it....but learn and educate. I don't know who gave it to me and I'm not sitting here trying to figure it out. I had sex, it's just part of having sex and I'm not pointing any fingers. What i am doing is telling everyone that needs to know. I told my ex straight away. He said it is what it is and he was sorry for me and will get himself tested. Without even knowing if it was him, after I explained about it all, he apologised if I had caught it from him, he doesn't know and nor do I. And i do not care. I choose to have sex, I'm a big girl, I knew about the risks. Next came the man I love, I was so damn nervous, but I will never lie and certainly not to him. After the initial shock and lots of questions I got the same response and he said he will support me 100% and get test also. What a relief. See it's not all nightmare stories. Things might change, he might change is mind and that's ok, it's his body and I am not in charge of his feelings. I can only do what i can do to protect him or whatever future partner I might have. I am scared of rejection. But what can I do about it, everyone is entitled to feel how they feel and I will be damned if I let it ruin my personality because I get a cold sore on my vagina from time to time!!! I'm frighten, yes I know extreme, but I am frightened of future OB. But I got past the first time I'l get past the next one, should it happen. I Have my coconut oil, ice parks and salt water at the ready. THIS THING WILL NOT BEAT ME! I realise I am new to this, I know at some point I will hate that I have it but for right now I'm gonna do my research, enjoy my life, take good care of my vagina and body, listen to the itches and the tingles and enjoy my sex life! My only real question I have is I hear "it's so common" and "it's hard to catch like 3%" and "you catch it at any point" all in the same sentence. Its get very confusing when explaining to someone I have it. But I told my boyfriend that he can get it regardless but I will never sleep with him when I have an OB and he will use condoms for now. But when the time is right, my plan is for a baby and condoms will be no more. He is OK with that. I'm not yet but I'm sure in time I will be. It's just like I said before part and parcel of having sex and he could get it from his next partner that doesn't even know she has it. I do, I can protect him as much as possible (if he doesn't have it already) and I say that is a good thing. So herpes you can stay in my body, I can't do much about that. But u will not ruin me and I will carry on with a smile on my face! I hope this has helped anyone reading this. I also open to be educated on anything to expect and any natural healings I can do to prevent and help recover from future outbreaks Thank you for listening and thank you in advance for any help, my virtual H friends ✌❤
  5. 4 days in with my hsv-1 diagnosis and I have been a mess to say the least. My newly discovered positive results have me not so positive, which is very unlike me. I cry about the diagnosis, I cry about my future and I just cry. My sister is a doctor and has been extremely helpful in this, but also tells me to just confide in her (which I know I will appreciate in the long run not telling just everyone about this) but also somewhat shameful. I find myself being upset for my family and friends? As if this somehow impacts their life just knowing me (someone with herpes now). I still hookup with one of my exes casually when I visit home and the idea of losing him completely makes me breakdown even more. I know I shouldn't, but I feel extremely unlovable and undesirable. I have never thought of myself as unattractive but now when I look in the mirror I just see disgust and start crying. I want to think of it as just a skin problem, but the idea i could give it to someone else down the road and them potentially feel like this, makes me feel sick. My sister convinced me to just do life normal and see how it doesn't impact me, and while its true my feelings about myself have changed, which in turn has changed life (for now at least). I went out with my friends and all I could think of in the back of my mind was how different I am than everyone. I was looking around thinking "who else is like me" the stats are so high at least some of these people at the bar have to be like me. right? I'm really glad I have my sister to ask the very obvious questions like "well you weren't different last weekend when you didn't know.." And I get that but I was happy last weekend in my bliss of not knowing. I hate the day I found out, it brought my world into a swirling black hole of sadness. I'm taking the medicine because I can't imagine how I would feel if I had another outbreak so soon. The idea of being the fun, loud, loving person I was a week ago feels like a whole lifetime ago and unreachable now. I can breakdown at just the thought this diagnosis may change who I am completely. I don't want to be upset about something so stupid, my outbreaks are more around my anus - not sure why but I am weirdly grateful for that? My vagina isn't any different but I don't ever want to touch it or look at it again, so why should I ever expect someone else to? Is this just going to take time? I'm going to look into finding a professional to talk to, but in the mean time do you have any suggestions on how to just move on? Or honestly, just some support would be comforting as I feel very isolated and lonely.
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