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Found 15 results

  1. So I apparently don’t get your classic blisters and bumps I get an ulcer/lesion. Am I the only one? This is only my second time having this happen in 3 years and it’s just as bad as the first time. Mine have happened after a bad sickness (thanks COVID). It’s been almost two weeks and I’m almost healed up and symptoms have faded (besides some itching). The lesion is almost gone and there is no scab. There was never a scab anyway because it’s a lesion inside the labia area not outside. Since I don’t have scabs to heal, when will I know it’s safe to resume sex? There is nothing coming out and it’s almost gone. It’s also the normal color of that area.
  2. I’ve had Herpes type 1 on my vagina for 3 Year’s now. I was in a relationship with a man the whole time and now that I’m single I’ve been exploring my sexuality with women but it’s also scary for me. My anxiety is at an all time high when I get physical with women and usually i stop because I’m scared I’m going to give them herpes. Whether I’m licking their nipples or kissing them or getting more sexual etc. I’m scared they’ll get herpes. Does anyone have any advice besides disclose to them? I’m trying to educate myself more on this but it just gets me depressed because I still feel like my life is over. I also want to add Im 19 with one sexual partner.
  3. I’ve had herpes pretty much the entire time I’ve been with my husband. He had never experienced symptoms and neither had I before we moved in together and I first started exhibiting symptoms. I had a swab test on painful vaginal sores and was diagnosed. 13 years ago. We love and accept and are committed to each other. But, the risk of a herpes outbreak often makes me afraid to have sex and I know it hurts us both. My herpes has never really been managed, which I hadn’t even really recognized until recently. I hate the story that people with herpes rarely have outbreaks and their first one is their worst one. I have outbreaks all the time and when they’ve gotten past a certain point they’re uncontrollable and terribly painful. I’m dying for sexual freedom. I also have painful sexual trauma which I’m reminded of during outbreaks and sometimes even sex. I’ve experienced some serious hurdles and breakthroughs but am eager for success. I’d love any help!
  4. Hi. How long after being diagnosed until you guys had unprotected sex while being on Suppressive therapy? ( GHSV1 BTW )
  5. Hi all, This forum keeps me sane, thank you for all being so brave for posting stories, feelings and concerns! This is my first proper post, so here goes... I have HSV1 genitally from an ex who gave it to me orally over 3.5 years ago. I had no idea this could happen. Anyways at the time it wasnt the worst thing in the world, I was actually pretty ok with it! It prob helped that the first 2 years I got very minor OBs every 6 months following the primary outbreak. We didnt use condoms and it wasn't ever on our minds because we were happy! Until then he randomly started drinking, locking me out and I found out he cheated on me, it was the strangest thing and I'll never understand. We then went through a horrible break up so I dont think this helped me with anxiety and stress... I was always so positive and optimistic until this time so anxiety was new to me and definitely overwhelmed me. Over the few months following this break up, the stress took its toll and I had regular outbreaks so i went to my hospital and got put on Acyclovir meds and took Lysine with advice from this site. (Thank you!) During 4 months after this, (2.5 years after being diagnosed) I disclosed/dated with meds+condoms with two people, it didnt stop me dating as I had confidence, but they didn't work out... and THEN I met the most amazing guy and we have been together nearly a year! Living together and have our future plans set! (There is a love life with someone H- after herpes, believe me!! never been happier!) He doesnt judge what I have, he knows the risks when it comes to everything, and was there for me when I went to a therapist for 10 sessions to help me accept what happened to me and move forward with my life again! Which i have 🙂 ((Side note, I found that after 6 months on Acyclovir just a couple of months into my new relationship that my hair was beginning to break, that I was becoming nauseous, achey and had strange prickly feelings in my legs and genitals. We decided together that I should stop the meds and instead use condoms.)) Anyways getting on to the main part of my post! Since then, in this 1 year period, I have only had 2 real OBs in this past year. The odd tingle but not true OB that I can physically see or usual OB cycle. We also agreed we want to be together long term and want to feel each other better so decided as I knew when I am on an OB and that I know my early sign symptoms we wouldn't use condoms (since about 5months ago). We have many very open honest conversations as much as I dont like talking about it (as I get embarassed) we know the risks, we know this means more likely transmission of 4% female to male, no meds or condoms etc. But he is happy to take that risk so we agreed to go ahead with nothing but me taking Lysine. Since then...my question is... how can "I" stop myself worrying about it STILL after each time we have sex, when after everytime we have sex I feel that maybe maybe maybe I feel the odd tingle! The past few months of feeling super confident that yes no condoms no meds, i know myself, sex has also left me feeling super frustrated. When I do feel confident, and we have sex, that tingle down there always makes me worry after.. we go not having sex for 2 weeks because I say No we better not just incase if I do feel concerned, and as I say also confident I've only had 2 OBs in the last year. We try again and then I worry again. Ive started to lose trust in my body over the last month with every time we have sex. The reason why I am posting is because Im worrying again! I guess its maybe my anxiety coming back playing with my mind that im not on meds or using condoms 😞 ? I find myself looking through conversations on this site every now and again trying to find answers to what I know are probably impossible questions... Does anyone else feel like this after sex? Anyone else not using condoms and meds with a H- partner? Has anyone had issues with Acyclovir like mine? I feel like the only thing we can do is go back to meds to help us enjoy sex still without condoms and to give me that peace of mind. The past 3 years I have known how my body works when it comes to OBs and trust it, but its always at the back of my mind now the past month or so, plus my boyfriend has been absolutely fine after each encounter the past few months. So why am i doing this... I really hope its not just me that questions everything I do when making mutual decisions with an incredibly accepting H- partner. Your thoughts, stories, etc are welcome please. It can't be just me struggling with my H- partner being so great and me still feeling concerned about his health/triple checking how I feel everytime. Thank you x
  6. Hey guys! I have been living with H for 3 months now and I recently met someone. I did my research but I haven't found answers for everything. I have HSV-1 genitally. Can someone go down on me without protection ( I'm a woman) without the risk of me transmitting it to them and vice versa ? Can I cuddle in my underwear or is it not safe? And this is a bit embarrassing but can someone finger me without protection or should we use gloves or something? I haven't been intimate with someone since i found out and even before, it was only with 1 guy for few times so I am new to this like completely. Any help is appreciated Thanks
  7. Just within the past month or so I’ve recently found out i had type 2 and I do take medicine for it every day (haven’t missed one day at all). The first initial breakout I had is the only one I’ve had so far. But I have so many questions about it and sex because it’s all still new to me and I’ve heard so many things not sure what to believe is true and not true. First off, is it possible to have a normal relationship with someone (who doesn’t have it)? What’s the things I can use to protect him from getting it? If he doesn’t have it and I do, can I give him oral without using one of those dental dams (only because I’ve never used one) without him catching it from me. What’s the actual risk of him catching it, even if we use condoms and I take my medication regularly? I’m so confused with all of it, I just want answers so we can be safe but I still want to have a normal life relationship wise.
  8. I had my first breakout back in January 2018 & was diagnosed with GHSV-1 through a swab test (& negative for GHSV-2). My boyfriend gave it to me from a cold sore on his lip & I've never had a cold sore on my mouth before so I suppose that is why However it's worrying because from what I've read everyone seems to have only 1 breakout (which is their initial) with GHSV-1, but I've had at least 5 breakouts this year since my first. During the past month I've had 3 separate breakouts & I've a feeling they're stemming from a poor diet & stress but I'd just want to know if these factors are big triggers? I've noticed that they do tend to happen after rough sex, but is that a trigger as well? I don't get colds often so I don't know if it's a matter of my immune system Is this normal? I'm so worried
  9. Just after some help on this really, when is it ok to have sex again after an outbreak? Also when do you judge an outbreak as cleared up as when i have an outbreak the sores tend to be gone within about a week but for about 3-4 weeks after you can still vaguely make out where they were. Has been about 6 weeks now and the frustration is driving me mad. Sorry if these are dumb questions,Thanks
  10. Hello everyone, I recently found out I have genital herpes after going to the dr for a "UTI" that didn't clear up after meds. It was caught a week and a half after the first (painful!) symptoms. How long does the first outbreak typically last? Thankfully, it's not as painful but it's incredibly itchy? I've tried a warm epson salt bath, hydrocortisone cream, and ice packs (they help the most) but the relief only lasts minutes. Does/did anyone face this issue too? As for dating, how long after the sores disappear is it okay to have sex? I'm currently active on dating sites and don't want herpes to stop me, otherwise I'd never get back out in the dating scene. I've already done a lot of research and know that the virus can shed off me at anytime even without sores present and it can be spread when in contact with an open wound or mucosal membrane like someone's eyes, mouth, or genitals. I feel lost. I'm having a hard time with the itchiness and the constant worry of spreading it.
  11. My boyfriend knows my status and doesnt seem to care if he contracts the virus or not. Even tho he has yet to have an outbreak im sure by now he has contracted the virus...He wont make time to get a blood test, he figures positive or negative he still wants to be with me. Is it bad we dont use condoms ?? are there cons of two hsv2 + people being intimate unprotected?
  12. If you weren't miserable/anxious about this, it would be something else. If this wasn't something you'd be afraid of facing rejection for, it'd be something else. There's always gonna be something to bring you down (if you let it), but it's better this than something else, something worse, maybe something life-threatening. There are so many people in a situation where they'd be willing to give their right arm in order to change situations with you and me, people with life threatening diseases..whether it's cancer or whatever, don't you think they'd happily have herpes instead of what they're struggling through. I'm not trying to belittle our pain because it's real to a lot of you and I know people sometimes find it annoying when somebody makes it seem like you don't have the right to be unhappy over something just because other people have it worse. I was always annoyed when people said that, not about this situation but just whatever situation I was unhappy with, knowing other people have it worse still doesn't take away my pain, and I get that..But seriously, after watching 50/50 (that joseph gordon levitt movie) I just thought, "damn, I'm lucky, I'm alive, I don't have something that I have NO control of, I don't have something that can really harm me, that character in the movie would've probably happily traded situations with me" this is what I posted on my tumblr: (Just watched 50/50 and damn, first of all.. fucking loved it! but it made me feel so I-don’t-give-a-fuck regarding my HPV and herpes, like wtf..it’s only a big deal if you choose to make it a big deal, it doesn’t have to be a big deal, now cancer is a big deal..I was having a breakdown over not having control over my body, well a lot of people actually don’t have any control over their bodies..some people have life-threatening illnesses, this is just an irritant. Like what the fuck, if I let this stop me from enjoying my life..I’m a fool. :P I’mma listen to awesome music, be around awesome people, have fucking awesome hot rough passionate sex, eat awesome food, shit’s gonna be good..cus I’m gonna decide for it to be. Gonna enjoy this life.) But seriously if something worse were to come up in your life, herpes would go in the backseat, you'd most likely ignore it, another pain would be in the spotlight, so there's always gonna be something..be relieved that this is the worst thing in your life (if it is). People fear rejection about a lot of things, people who have been abused might worry that if a person they're dating knew that they wouldn't want to be with them anymore, people who have self-harmed/do self-harm might worry that if the person they're dating knew about it that they wouldn't want to be with them anymore, let's say those people is your friend and your friend came up to you and told you that someone she was dating had rejected her for that..you'd tell her he was a jerk, would you not? and it'd be true and you'd tell her she was better off without that person and that she's lucky she saw his true colors before anything more happen and you'd be right in that. People always have a fear of rejection regarding something, our reason isn't any worse than others. The risk isn't that high and when you have the facts and you're calm and confident about the fact that this doesn't change your life (which is a fact, it's a choice whether or not you let it change things in a way that you're not comfortable with) and if the person you're having sex with would get herpes, it's not that horrible, we're all living it, I want to set an example for the person that I'm going to have sex with that this isn't a big deal, this doesn't change me, this doesn't change my life for the worse, the only thing it changes is that you have to be honest and practice safe sex (which you should be anyway if it wasn't for this) Damn, sorry for babbling.
  13. I'm hoping to find more information about the possibility of oral hsv2 transmission, the likeliness of it happening, do many of you have it? Have many/any of you given it? I'm finding it difficult to find information on this, I know it's rare, but if it is a possibility I'd like to be able to offer concise, factual information to my partner, not just "oh it's so rare, don't even worry about it." In short I really miss being on the receiving end of oral sex so any light anyone could shed on this would be oh so helpful. Please!!! I'm losing my [email protected] mind!!!!!
  14. There was a time where I was a very religious/Christian/spiritual type person. I would pray every night and go to church 2x per week almost. I slowly moved away from this and did not pray as much and became more sexually active with people who I did not have serious commitments with. I felt that as long as my partner wore a condom, everything would be ok. Or, if my partner had no signs of an outbreak, which I would have hoped they would tell me if they did, I could not catch anything. Well, I did catch HSV-2 from a partner that was wearing a condom and had never had an outbreak. He was completely unaware that he had HSV-2 until I had an outbreak a week after we had sex and called to tell him. What is wearing on my mind is that I wonder if I had been a more faithful and praying person, would this not have happened? Did God lift his protection from me because I was not praying like I should have or going to church like I should? I have friends that sleep with a different guy every month (or more), but they pray and go to church and nothing has happened to them. I know that this may sound crazy, but it is how I feel. I feel that God stopped protecting me when I stopped being as faithful.
  15. I have herpes. What a load off my chest. I know that I know none of you personally and anyone who reads this probably doesn’t know who I am, but despite that I have told you something I don’t even tell my closest friends. I’ve had herpes for about four months and the first outbreak had to be one of the most, if not THE most, painful thing I’ve ever experienced. I had no idea what was going on to my body, so you can imagine the shock when my doctor brought up the possibility of me having the STD. My heart dropped. There was no way. I was in a monogamous relationship for four years and both he and I were virgins when we met. I had been with no one else. So you can imagine what was going on through my head. The words, “My amazing, sweet, and loving boyfriend…cheated on me.” The thought was worse than getting diagnosed. It turns out, however, he had HSV-1 since he was a little kid and had mistaken it for only cold sores of the mouth. Turns out HSV-1 can be transferred to different areas of the body. We had no idea. He got tested and came back positive for HSV-1. So did I. I can’t be angry with him. It’s not as if he purposely tried to give this to me, he had no clue. Even if he did know, I’m not sure if it would have exactly changed anything in our relationship; now that I’ve been fully informed about HSV. It’s strange how much the media brings such a negative vibe on Herpes; as if only unfaithful and the sex-crazed get this virus and anyone with it should be shunned. Huh… You know, in a way, I’m kind of thankful for Herpes. It’s given me a better sense of judgment.
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