Should I disclose even if we are not having sex?

[Carly2020]

Hi everyone, I was diagnosed two years ago and still haven't had the courage to disclose it to anyone. I've been avoiding intamacy all together. However, just recently I shared a bed with someone I was interested in. There was kissing, cuddling, and short points wear my inner thigh would have been touching his skin. We didn't touch each other, but we did touch ourselves independently. I am petrified of giving it to someone else. I'm not sure if this was morally wrong not to disclose in this instance. 

[SweetLeo]

I think you are okay in this instance. Just learn from it going forward and do what makes you comfortable. There is no magical guide to herpes handbook with all the rules outlined. Obviously you know where you would like this relationship to go and you should disclose before things get all hot and heavy. Sometimes that can make the conversation more awkward when you both are half naked. 😳

[Tanari]

When it comes to disclosing what works for me is having it before intimacy but it greatly depends on how I feel about the other person and the possibility of maybe having a relationship, a sexual one for that matter, if you have no intentions of engaging in any sexual activity with that person then you don't have to disclose but if you do intend to engage in any sexual activities with them then by all means you should start disclosing, at first it maybe tough but the more you disclose the more confident you will get when talking about herpes with a potential partners , best of luck 

 

[Carly2020]

Thanks so much for your replies. I really appreciate your advice. I've just downloaded "the talk" handbook, so I will read up on pointers before getting myself in that position again. Scary, but necessary.

 

Thank you!